BIL Scrooge - Christmas related

[Scroogyface]

Me, my db and gf, ds and bil will all be at my DM's this Christmas.my mum asked me to arrange a secret Santa for adults to exchange a £5 gift on Christmas morning as a token fun thing. I do it via a good online site that sends out invites and then does the draw. Sent out the invites two weeks ago and pretty much everyone replied straight away (you literally have to click a button saying 'I accept') it's less than 30 secs but had also messaged DS and DB about it and they were keen and enthusiastic. BIL never clicked on the accept button which meant I couldn't make the draw for names today. Texted DSis yesterday to ask if she could nudge him. Nothing. AIBu to think you just have to get onboard and click on a fricking button so we can do secret Santa, my DM wants to do it, it's her house, it's a £5 spend limit, its just really straight forward! It won't happen just because he can't be arsed to click a button. To avoid drip feeding I get on v well with my siblings and their partners but this has really pissed me off! It's classic 'what applies to others just doesn't apply to me'

[Ahickiefromkinickie]

YANBU. Can you re-send and exclude BIL? (after sending one last message giving him 24 hours in which to click).

[bigredfireengine]

God that sounds complicated. Couldn't you just do a random one that anyone who wants can join in? £5 is a perfect amount for that. If you put a gift in then you get to take one out. You can those a theme if you want.

You are over complicating it.

[Scroogyface]

I can't exclude BIL and wouldn't want to - it's a family Christmas and he's lovely!

Honestly not complicated bigred you get an email (which he got) click on a button, then get another email saying who you're buying for. We've done it this way before. I'll just need to call my dsis to make him do it but it so smacks of can't be arsed!

[SantaPleaseBringMeEwanMcGregor]

Talk to BIL and see if he wants to take part, and if so, did he even get the EMail? Sometimes things like that are auto-routed to a spam folder if you use GMail or something.

If he wants to take part, your choices are:

• Tell him to click within 24 hours, or you carry on without him.
  
  
• If he doesn't click, draw from a hat that includes his name.
  
  
• Or make a dummy account with Hotmail, send an invite to that one, and then accept it, and that's "his" spot in it.
  
  Honestly, I would check with him, and then if he doesn't respond in a timely manner, just carry on.

[Andylion]

Which is it, is he a Scrooge or is he lovely? Did your DSis indicate that he would participate?

[honeyroar]

It really does sound over complicated! We do secret Santa every year and don't need apps or computers! Just put everyone's names in a hat, draw them out and then tell him who he's got? I think I'd be a bit shocked to get an email asking to accept by clicking a button if I was going to someone's house for Xmas.