To Not Like My Mum

[SheDoneAlreadyDoneHadHerses]

I love her, don't get me wrong, but my GOD, she's annoying.

We've always rowed from me being 13yrs old and "becoming hormonal" - her words. We are absolute polar opposites.

We've just had a blazing row where I've walked out to get away from it turning nasty because she started telling me how to parent and I told her it wasn't her place to comment (it was really incredibly trivial but it hurt me a little) and she got incredibly - overly - offended. I tried pointing out she was at fault too but no, she wasn't offensive, how dare I, then she started saying "I'll never do anything for you again, you'll never shout at me again in this house. Go on get out."

She gets offended but refuses to believe that she too is offensive. She does this with both me and my DS. She can say what she likes, how she likes, but neither of us are allowed to disagree or be offended.

The older she gets, the more cantankerous she's becoming - and the more offended (seriously, I need a different word) she is by everyone, eg the shop assistant in Aldi made her feel stupid, the people on the phone at Sky, me, my son, etc etc.

But apparently she's blameless. I'm at the point where I'm not going round now unless she asks me to. I've historically always had to apologise as "I'm the child" and I CBA anymore.

AIBU to finally realise that yes, we're related, but we wind each other up, so we need space as two grown ups? And ask how to take it from here?

[elephantfeet]

She sounds just like my mum. I moved 300 miles away.

[BabooshkaKate]

My mum is pretty similar. I don't seek out contact and keep things brief and never go into details with my life any more.

[Sangria]

So she has always been difficult but is getting worse now; that was how my neighbour's dementia started.

[SheDoneAlreadyDoneHadHerses]

Sangria I've told her that I'm worried about this. She had a stroke about 4 years ago and has just progressively gotten cantankerous, but I've always been aware that I automatically get on the defensive when I'm round at hers.

She'll listen to you and then either completely ignore what you've just said so you have to repeat yourself or repeat word for word what you've just said. When you point this out, she just says she wasn't listening.

[SheDoneAlreadyDoneHadHerses]

Think she's mentioned it to the doctor and they've said it's normal age-related decline.