Show your dh/mil/neighbour from hell this thread

[Soubriquet]

I keep seeing this line trotted out. Over and over again

Someone posts about how their Dh/mil/SIL/Bob from down the road is being absolute twat. Mostly bordering on abusive and everytime someone will trot out, "show them this thread. Maybe they will see they are wrong"

No no no no no no no!!! You never show a person in the wrong a thread in the hope they wil have an attitude change. It's more likely they will lash out.

AIBU to think people should stop suggesting it?

[HerRoyalFattyness]

Yanbu. If some posters showed their dp/mil/sil/cat a thread on here they would be about it. And probably have a go for posting personal shit online. it would be just another excuse for them to have a go at the OP.

[EverySongbirdSays]

YANBU.

I'm on the verge of starting a thread about a close friend, and have posted as anonymously as I possibly could under an NC about a family matter.

I certainly wouldn't want my family to not only see what I'd written on one thread but be able to search my username on others.

It's particularly inadvisable for people in domestic violence scenarios or even emotionally abusive ones, where anything they say can be turned on them.

For some people having a private outlet of escape where they can talk to other women without being outed is vital.

[QuiteLikely5]

I've never seen the line used where it wouldn't be safe or it would be crazy to show someone because of the circs

I can't believe how wound up by it you seem tbh..........

[Soubriquet]

I'm not wound up.
It takes a lot more than that to wind me up.

But you obviously haven't been looking hard enough if you haven't seen a potentially dangerous thread being advised to show their Dh in the hope he will see the error of his ways

[DallowSpicerPinkieCubitt]

I agree. I made the fatal mistake of telling my mum "all my friends think you're being unreasonable too" it didn't end well

[TaliZorahVasNormandy]

YANBU. Proof of their unreasonableness will only make them more aggressive.

[wombattoo]

YANBU. I just don't see the point. If a person posts on here about a problem it's usually because they can't/won't say it in real life. It would seem weird to me to then point out a thread you've started about them

[NKFell]

YANBU!

You'd look like such a weirdo as well. Can you imagine: "see I am right, strangers on the internet say so!!"

[JellyPlum]

They type of person that is generally very unreasonable and doesn't think that they are is extremely unlikely to be swayed by random people on a forum.

And there's no way I'm showing my neighbour (as an example) what my MN name is. No way.

[Fairybella]

I would never show someone my thread... That could unleash all kinds of hell!

[Nocabbageinmyeye]

I've never seen it trotted out in dangerous situations either to be fair and while I have seen it it's definitely not a regular occurrence.

A few years back I had a thread on a different site about my dh but before we were married, I would never ever have shown him but he saw it by mistake, it did turn out to be a good thing, it was the type of thread you'd have read in relationships, I think had I spoken about it to him I wouldn't have been as honest as i was in the thread and the replies really hit home with him, it may not have had the same effect if I had said "haha I was right and these internet strangers prove it" though but it's not always a bad thing if the person the thread is about sees it