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AIBU?

To feel like a timewaster at the doctors?

11 replies

HeadsDownThumbsUpEveryone · 23/08/2016 08:59

I'm a first time poster but long time lurker mostly I am sure of my 'reasonableness' but I am really struggling with this, sorry it's so long.

A few weeks ago I noticed a mole on my upper back, I noticed it because it was seriously itchy and sore. Upon looking at pictures from last summer I realised it was a new mole and after looking on the NHS site decided to book a GP appointment to ease my worries (I have cancer on both sides of my family but did not want to jump to conclusions).

Getting an appointment was extremely difficult I rang 41 times and spoke to 4 people but eventually I got one. Although the doctor I saw was lovely she said she had not got specific training in this area and booked me in with another doctor for a week later.

I spent a week worrying on an off the mole was still itchy and it was getting darker in colour since my last appointment, so I was relieved when I went yesterday to get it checked out by the 'specialist' doctor. However at my appointment he looked at it through a dermascope and told me its just a mole, then he turned back to his computer. When I asked about the itching, soreness change of colour and mentioned it was a new mole he dismissed me saying it was a mole (whilst still looking at his computer) and that he hadn't seen it changing. That was it, no compassion no eye contact, not even any discussion on what to do next he then continued to stare at his computer until I left.

So now I feel like I have spent 3ish weeks worrying about a mole that's still itchy and sore for no reason and I left the Doctors feeling like a great big timewaster, was IBU to make an appointment and do you think his behaviour was acceptable. Am still feeling very miserable about the whole experience. Sad

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Champagneformyrealfriends · 23/08/2016 09:01

Yanbu, and if it's anything more you could put in an extremely serious complaint. Ask to see one of the partners if you can for a second opinion.

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PeppaPigTastesLikeBacon · 23/08/2016 09:03

If your unhappy with what was discussed then go back to the doctor again. Try and take pictures each day of the mole and maybe keep a diary about it - seems bizarre to do this but it helped me to get a diagnosis of a very uncommon condition - which I went back quite a number of times before being reffered to a proper specialist. If you have the money you could see if there is a dermatologist (if that's the correct person?) to see if they can help?

I would definitely keep chasing if your worried and you think you haven't been seen properly

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gingerboy1912 · 23/08/2016 09:06

Yanbu that second doctor had a dreadful bedside manner. You were right to get it checked out.

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123therearenomoreusernames · 23/08/2016 09:14

If you are still worried some of the Big chemist chains like Boots have a mole screening service.

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catonlap · 23/08/2016 09:15

The fact that it was normal under the dermatoscope is reassuring on the cancer front. However it doesn't sound like the Dr's communication skills were very good in explaining it to you. You also didn't get a solution to the irritation you have been suffering. Is the mole in an area where it is rubbing (on bra strap for example)?

Sometimes rubbing on a bit of vaseline frequently for a while will help to soothe the irritation (obviously won't remove the actual mole, just can settle it). If simple measures like that don't work then a lot of GP surgeries have a minor surgery doctor who can remove such things on the basis of them causing irritation.

Also agree with taking photo for comparison later. If you can with a ruler by it in the photo as size can be difficult to determine if nothing is next to it.

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HeadsDownThumbsUpEveryone · 23/08/2016 09:26

Thanks to everyone who has replied so far. You have helped to reassure me that I wasn't daft for visiting the Doctors, I was only following their own advice after all. He really was incredibly dismissive and the whole appointment took at most 2 minutes (of which 30ish seconds was me sitting there wondering if I should leave yet).

The mole is about 6 cm away from my bra strap so not caused by that. I will take pictures of it as suggested but really don't think another appointment will do any good, it seemed like he was the expert at the practice so I would probably end up with him again, that's if I can even get through to book an appointment! Will probably go and see someone at the local boots store if I notive any other major changes.

Also thanks Catonlap hopefully vaseline will help reduce the amount of itching because it's still incredibly distracting at the moment.

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Bantanddec · 23/08/2016 09:41

Ask for a second opinion with a different doctor, try amd get a referel for your own peace of mind. You are not a time waster we constantly have 'check for lumps' and 'check moles' rammed down our throats by NHS propaganda yet when you are being vigilant you feel dismissed.

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ACatCalledFang · 23/08/2016 09:47

He shouldn't have spoken to you like that. I once got an existing mole checked out as I thought it had changed shape slightly - it took about ten seconds for the GP to tell me it was fine, but he told me I must never worry about wasting a doctor's time with that sort of query as it is very quick to check but could potentially be serious (basically, he'd rather see 99 normal moles than risk missing the one which requires further attention).

If you're at all concerned, get a second opinion and, if it can only be with that doctor, consider taking someone with you to ram home the point that it's a new mole and you're worried.

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toptoe · 23/08/2016 09:58

I've had a mole checked. This is how my doc dealt with it.
Phoned for appointment, got one (not sure why you had to phone 41 times - that's crazy!) with the specialist.
He listened to my concern about the mole. He looked at it through the little eyeglass thingy. He said it looked ok and explained why (can't remember the details now I'm afraid)
Then he asked me about skin cancer in my family (it's common) Then he asked if I used suncream and told me to use it often. He stressed I should come back with any concerns about anything odd with my skin, not just moles.
It didn't take long - 5 mins app - but it was thorough and I was ttreated well.

I think you need a second opinion.Maybe a private skin clinic?

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toptoe · 23/08/2016 09:59
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HeadsDownThumbsUpEveryone · 23/08/2016 10:07

Bantandec - we constantly have 'check for lumps' and 'check moles' rammed down our throats by NHS propaganda yet when you are being vigilant you feel dismissed - This is exactlyhow I felt, like he thought I was being melodramatic about it when the onnly reason I booked it was because of how often we are reminded to get this stuff checked out.

Toptoe- It sounds like you had a much more plesant experience with the specialist, I wish they had asked about my family history as that's the main reason I am so worried. I will look into a private consultation, although I do feel like it's a slight cop out that I have to even consider paying to get peace of mind! I really wish I was exagerating with the difficulty in getting an apoointment its near impossible and they don't make them in advance so if someone needs treament after the 8-8.05 window in which the dish out appointments then you have no chance.

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