AIBU to not want house guests

(17 Posts)
AcheyMiddle Fri 29-Jul-16 19:22:34

Is it wrong that I hate having my perfectly lovely, easy going in laws to stay over? I hate waking around in the morning not dressed for the day so have to get up, shower, and get dressed immediately, so no slobbing about. I also hate having to talk all the time, sometimes I want to sit and read and just watch telly. Said guests are helpful, clean, tidy, not demanding at all. I just much prefer it when they stay in a hotel nearby. Am I being mean because they're in laws and not my family, or is it totally reasonable to feel like this? They currently stay in a sofa bed in the lounge. We need a new sofa, is it mean to get one that's not a sofa bed but to get one that actually looks nice and that I like? Or should we bear them in mind and buy a sofa bed so they can stay over in the future? Thanks all.

AcheyMiddle Fri 29-Jul-16 19:23:33

Oops, clearly I didn't mean to post it in pregnancy! How do I get this moved?

ethelb Fri 29-Jul-16 19:26:48

Are you offering to pay for the hotel?

AcheyMiddle Fri 29-Jul-16 19:28:53

No, should we?

PresidentOliviaMumsnet (MNHQ) Fri 29-Jul-16 19:52:32

Do you or are you planning to have DC? IN which case keep em handy for babysitting grin
We've moved this thread btw

Leviticus Fri 29-Jul-16 19:55:59

YANBU to not feel like doing it but sometimes we have to put ourselves out for other people.

What's the alternative?

AcheyMiddle Fri 29-Jul-16 19:58:35

Yep, I see your point. Keep smiling keep them sweet (yes we do have dc).
Thanks for moving it :-)

dimots Fri 29-Jul-16 20:01:40

Get one of those double air beds that blows up to be full height like a normal bed. Then buy the sofa you like.

Fluffyears Fri 29-Jul-16 20:03:40

Yep double air bed then get sofa of your choice m.

NellyMelly Fri 29-Jul-16 20:06:20

They seem nice and not causing problems so you should put up with them as they are your family. The airbed sounds a good solution. Can you go out in the day and escape for a few hours to relax.

AcheyMiddle Fri 29-Jul-16 20:12:37

That's probably the best solution, the big air bed one. I'll suggest it, I'll definitely think that's what we should do.

I can't really escape during the day as they only come for a few days and we tend to do planned activities together. It just feels like an intense few days. They're perfectly nice people, just nothing like me at all (I am nice enough though!).

LaurieLemons Fri 29-Jul-16 20:13:48

Well you can't help the way you feel but you would be unreasonable to not let them stay I think. You don't want to make them feel unwelcome.

There is no reason you can't watch tv or you have to get dressed straight away if they're normal nice people they won't care, so really that's your issue not theirs.

babba2014 Fri 29-Jul-16 20:28:32

I am probably the least sociable person but honestly if they are nice, pleasant people I would let them stay. It is nice having people who care and act normal. This is coming from someone whose in laws don't bother with DCs yet live round the corner. And aren't that pleasant.

It's a breath of fresh air knowing there's kind, genuine people out there. I'd say welcome it with open arms. You are very lucky. But I would also say tell your OH to plan something in between for him and his parents so you get a break.

StillStayingClassySanDiego Fri 29-Jul-16 20:30:28

How often do they visit?

panegyricS1 Fri 29-Jul-16 20:35:27

Kipping on a sofa bed isn't ideal for anyone who isn't a student any more, frankly. Perhaps they'd prefer to stay in an hotel but don't wish to offend you? What does DH reckon?

AcheyMiddle Fri 29-Jul-16 20:42:57

That was a really good reality check for me, babba. Thanks.

I'd say they come 3/4 times a year. And sometimes they do stay in a hotel, but sometimes it's at our house. I think secretly dh would rather them stay in a hotel but he'd never admit it.

Jayfee Fri 29-Jul-16 22:21:02

I think more than one night in the lounge is too long. I also like company, but like time on my own or with my husband. So when I visit or have guests i always either suggest they go out e.g. it's a nice day i thought you and joe might fancy a walk by the river. If I am visiting I would just say, your dad and I thought we would pop out and give you and Laura some time alone. I sometimes see whole families, parents small children and inlaws out walking and they don't always look happy. You can have too much of a good thing.

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