To hate flying so much

[Maisy313]

Due to fly at 7.50am tomorrow for work reasons, haven't slept properly for days, not hungry, not interested in sex - feel like every time I walk my ds to school or cuddle my toddler that it's the last time. I will be gone for 4 days and do realise I'm completely pathetic. How the fuck do I get over this fear and make myself get on the plane so I don't get sacked???

[WhyCantIuseTheNameIWant]

You are gone for 4 days.

Keep focused on day 5.

Toddler will be pleased to see you.
You can make special breakfast.
Bring him or her a little present.

Just remember it could be worse. You could be flying with a toddler.

I agree with you though. I hate flying.
I have decided it will be easier to drive to the south of France next time, from Liverpool, rather than flying.

Flying was absolute hell.

[Maisy313]

Haha yes we are also thinking south of France for holiday. Thank you, I miss them already. I know it's so silly but just feel so scared of flying I can't see anything past it, which makes saying goodbye to the boys very hard.

[Dinosaur1991]

I know exactly how you feel, I'm petrified of flying even though I know it's illogical. I remember reading a thread on here before about fear of flying and somebody suggested downloading the flight rador app and seeing just how many planes are in the air at any one time. It really is quite reassuring!

[expatinscotland]

I hate it because as forms of travel go, it's a fucking PITA. Constant rule changing at security, long queues at security, having to take all your fucking stuff out of your hand luggage - toiletries, electronics, etc. Once I'm on and in my seat it's okay.

[Crispbutty]

I was scared, put off seeing family for ten years because of it and the suddenly realised, there are thousands of planes in the sky, every single day, that take off, land, and have far more safety checks than any other mode of transport.

You really do have more chance of something worse happening driving down the road. Honestly.

[Maisy313]

Thanks CrispButty, I need to stop reminding myself that it's not a hugely risky venture! Short haul, BA flight... Urghhh shaking already though!

[Crispbutty]

You will be fine. Look at someone like Victoria Beckham, half her life is spent in the air. Look at the departure and arrivals boards at hundreds of airports worldwide. It really is safe. No plane has ever fallen out of the sky due to turbulence as far as I am aware. You will be absolutely ok.

[Honeyandfizz]

You have my complete sympathy op. I haven't flown in a few years now due to my fear so I have no real advice. X

[SpaceKablooie]

Honestly, ask your GP for some beta blockers. You can still drive, they just stop the symptoms of anxiety.

[AppleSetsSail]

You have my sympathy as well. Hate flying. I agree that you should seek medication, although that won't help tomorrow.

Short flight on BA is great.

[MakeItRain]

I feel the same as you about flying, with the same fears about everything being the "final" time. I had hypnotherapy which worked really well the last year I flew. Having had a gap now though I can't imagine getting on a plane again. I would grit your teeth and get on with it this time. Rescue remedy is quite good.

Once you get back, can you rethink your job? Do you have to fly? Is it really worth it if it's this difficult for you?

[VeryBitchyRestingFace]

I'm not a good flyer, but have to do it for work.

I'm a wreck on the take offs, moderately to severely anxious when cruising, and as happy as a clam when descending.

On a long haul daytime flight recently, I sat behind one of the wings. I found this strangely comforting. In the past, I got spooked by sudden unexplained jolts/noises etc. This time I could see that the noises corresponded to the flaps lifting/closing.

I think BA and Easyjet run courses in flying for the insanely terrified. Costs about £200.

[oenophilia]

Been there OP! Flying with Confidence courses are worth every penny. And let the flight crew know when you board - or even at check in. I always do and they look after me (extra gin has been known), let me talk to the flight deck etc. On a not very busy flight back from Milan the purser even came and sat with me and had a long chat about him and his partner and how they were in the process of adopting. No-one has ever laughed at me or made me feel daft. They're used to it and would much rather know and help than suddenly find themselves with a gibbering wreck. You'll be fine.

[vulgarbunting]

Definitely been there. Most recently cried in front of someone super senior because there was turbulance. Get some diazepam, and maybe a fear of flying course (I do diazepam which works well most of the time. I need to do the course).

[Maisy313]

Thanks everyone for being so kind! I've got some karms stuff so hopefully that will help. Will be so happy if I touch for safely on Sunday night!

[goingmadinthecountry]

I hate it too. Always text all my children just before I set off!! You'll be absolutely fine. If in doubt, a large G and T always helps me x

[WhyCantIuseTheNameIWant]

Keep planning Sunday and Monday op.
Be brave for your kids.

[arethereanyleftatall]

I loved the Alan Carr 'get over your fear of flying' book.
Every time I'm in turbulence I always remember the bit in the book where he likened that to a car going over cobblestones.
Also, when I'm on the ground and a plane passes overhead, I never think it's going to fall out of the sky on to me.