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Is it reasonable for a teacher to tell a 10 year old that she should grow up?

8 replies

AJ65 · 25/04/2016 17:35

My daughter was having a hard time focusing in class today so the teacher asked to speak to her at playtime. She told him she'd been kept up by the sounds of foxes from behind our house.

The teacher then told her that if his 5 yo was woken up, he'd play him a clip to explain the noise and he'd go straight back to sleep. He went on to say that she needed to grow up and that he'd walked to and from school from the age of 8 and she shouldn't have her mother walk her to and from school every day.

Is this acceptable or am I being unreasonable?

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Birdsgottafly · 25/04/2016 17:40

Speak to the teacher, get his version of events.

Then tell him it's irrelevant at what age he walked to school. Eight? There's children working full time at that age and girls in other countries all ready married, his point was?

I'm like a tiger if anyone (including my DH) told me how I should be 'Mothering'.

If it was said like that, he's overstepped the mark.

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abbieanders · 25/04/2016 17:42

Well I assume your daughter doesn't get to choose whether you walk her or not, but overall, you may be a bit. You're not very explicit about what was going on in class and it may well be the case that she did behave in a way you might consider typical of a younger child.

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TheSolitaryBoojum · 25/04/2016 17:42

He's tactless and judgemental, and times have changed since he was a little lad in short trousers going to school. There are thousands of children escorted by parents, many even driven.
Foxes are noisy.
So are you going to drop in and have a word, or was she not that bothered and would be comforted by you pointing out he's being an arse?

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curren · 25/04/2016 17:49

I would speak to the teacher and get his version.

What age he walked to school is neither here nor there.

But it also doesn't seem related to the conversation. So it's possible that either she has left bits out or got it wrong.

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AngieBolen · 25/04/2016 17:50

I walked to and from school when I was 8. This is totally irrelevant to any other child.

The whole conversation seems very odd.

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AJ65 · 25/04/2016 17:55

Thanks for your responses.

I posted because I wasn't sure what to do. I think he's overstepping the mark and he's gone from being one of her favourite teachers to being loathed. I think I'll see if I can talk to her class teacher about it first, and take it further if necessary.

I just looked up some fox noises and played them to my daugther; she identified the 'foxes fighting' as the sound she'd heard and I've got to say I've found it hard to get back to sleep when they're at it in the front of the house (she's in the back and I've suggested she comes into our room if it happens again; lord knows what Mr Teacher would think of that!)

And, yes, I walked to and from school on my own at 8 and was a latch key kid to boot. Not an experience I want to pass on to my own child.

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AJ65 · 25/04/2016 17:57

Now that I think about it my half sisters were driven to school until they were 18! And they are now both successful and capable adults!

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Lovewineandchocs · 25/04/2016 17:57

Yes I would also get his version. Sounds initially like a decent suggestion, playing the clip, but was he trying to say she should be old enough to understand the noise? Talking about walking to school would seem an odd segue unless he'd been showing exasperation about her not being "mature" enough to not be scared by fox noises and then proceeded to say "and what's more, you're old enough to walk to school yourself" blah blah blah. If he did say, I'd tell him you'll walk your child to school if you like and to mind his own damn business! I'd also be tempted to ask him if he'd been an arsehole since the age of 8 also Grin

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