To think this woman shouldn't be involving her dd in this parental fall-out?

[lecce]

There are two women we know through school. Our dc all play together and we three families quite often meet up at weekends etc. Recently, it has become clear that the other two women have a bit of tension between them. Partly it is because the ds of woman 1, we'll call her Mo, is a little too boisterous in the way he plays for woman 2 - I'll call her Val. However, it is also the case that Mo and Val have always had 'issues' and seem to clash over every little thing. Up until now though, they have managed to keep a lid on it.

On Friday, dh texted me to say he was mortified as Mo and Val were having a huge row in the park after school. Ostensibly it was because Mo's ds had been aggravating Val's dd with a stick, but dh also got the impression that grievances were being aired and they were letting rip at each other about a lot of other stuff that had been building up. Both said stuff about each other's child - it really wasn't pretty .

Earlier tonight I had a text from Val saying she was feeling low. Her dh works away and she was whittling about seeing Mo tomorrow. I went round for a chat and she told me that Mo had sent her a text suggesting they maintain friendly relations for the sake of the dc. Mo also apologised for her part in the row. Val then showed me her reply. It stated that they should stay away from each other as there is clearly no hope they can be friends. I thought it a little harsh, especially since they will have to see each other at school most days anyway. She then told me she had showed the text to her 5 yr old dd to get her opinion on it .

AIBU to think this is totally inappropriate? It involves children in an adult dispute and does not set a good example in resolving differences. Yes, some differences are irreconcilable, but not, imo, for 5 yr olds. All three of the dc are friends, but now I think Val's dd may feel awkward playing with Mo's ds as she now knows her Mum can't stand his.

I now feel dh and I, especially dh, are to be stuck in the middle, with Val attempting to call the shots .

[plentyofpipecleaners]

YANBU. What did you say when she told you this?