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AIBU?

baby juice and DM - am I BU and PFB?

26 replies

rubberducky24 · 10/07/2013 11:50

perspective needed please! DD is 10mo, not a big water drinker but am doing my best to get her used to it. Have told DM that I don't want her to have baby juice, but my mum has gone and got it anyway. Am I BU to be a bit annoyed about this? Am I being odd and PFB in only wanting her to drink milk or water until she is a little bit older? She does drink enough water so am not worried about her dehydrating in this weather, I just don't want her getting used to things I think are unnecessary. Is this normal??? Any feedback on the pros and cons of baby juice appreciated!

OP posts:
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TondelayoSchwarzkopf · 10/07/2013 11:52

YANBU but some people will think you are. Best to hold off the sugary crap until they actually badger and nag for it.

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PerchedOnMyPeddleStool · 10/07/2013 11:52

I don't even know what baby juice is?!
It sounds... Odd.

Milk and water are fine.

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aldiwhore · 10/07/2013 11:55

YANBU to be annoyed. Your DM is BU.

Unfortunately this is incredibly common! I think you need to put your foot down (as nicely as possible) now, because you can sure there will be other things!

It's taken nearly 10 years to train my Mum to just check with me first, and she's got the hang of it now mostly, there are times when she treats the children without my knowledge, and occasionally I will allow her that!

If I had my time again I would be much more strict with juices, neither of my boys drink water they would rather get dehydrated, I've just about managed to get them drinking very diluted juice - it would have been a lot easier had I stuck to my guns when they were little!

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MonstersDontCry · 10/07/2013 11:55

YANBU. Don't go down the sugary drink route. Not worth it, especially as your DD drinks water anyway.

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WilsonFrickett · 10/07/2013 11:56

When my PFB was 10 months this would have driven me insane. Now he is nearly 8, I can appreciate that this sort of thing isn't that important in the grand scheme of things, although it is annoying.

Have you told your DM why you don't want her to have juice? Have you talked about teeth and only wanting to give water/milk and why you think that's important? Because she genuinely may not have thought it through.

If she persists, it really doesn't do children any harm to learn that different rules apply in different places. So while she may have juice at grandma's, she won't have it at home. Presumably she is only at your dm's occasionally so it won't do any real harm?

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littleducks · 10/07/2013 11:57

Stick with water definitely.

But tbf to your mum baby juice us outdated but was seen as good/recommended at one point so she is just out of date.

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LemonBreeland · 10/07/2013 11:59

It would really annoy me. I always fought to get my babies to drink water, and after a while they get used to it. I hated hearing people say that theirs wouldn't drink plain water and would only have juice.

Clearly if you offer sweet juice then they will drink that in preference. I didn't want mine to have juice because wanted them to get used to water.

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FirstStopCafe · 10/07/2013 12:00

YANBU I'd hate this

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JADS · 10/07/2013 12:02

YANBU or pfb

If she drinks milk and water why bother with expensive flavoured water? I am a dentist and after seeing the damage these sort of drinks can do, I would steer clear for as long as possible. I am well aware they aren't crack cocaine, but kids do seem to get addicted to them.

If your mum is insistant, then only at meals in a cup and never in a bottle, ever.

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IneedAyoniNickname · 10/07/2013 12:05

Yanbu. My dc never had juice at that age, and even now at 8 and 6, ask for water most of the time.

Admittedly, in the grand scheme of things, its not really important, BUT, as the mother its up to you what your pfb baby drinks

(and I say pfb in a jokey way)

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NeeeNawwwNeeeNawww · 10/07/2013 12:06

It'd really boil my piss if my mum went against something I had specifically said. YANBU.

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Sirzy · 10/07/2013 12:10

Lemon - it doesn't work like that with all children though. DS would have dehydrated rather than drink water so had weak juice instead as it was by far the lesser of 2 'evils'. At 3.5 he now drinks water out of choice and rarely has juice.

The ops mum shouldn't have gone behind her back, but really a bit of juice isn't the end of the world especially when a baby refuses other things.

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FreudiansSlipper · 10/07/2013 12:10

yanbu

ds did not have juice until he was older and that was pure fruit juice with water

he now really only drinks milk or water and he is 5

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DoJo · 10/07/2013 12:12

YANBU - my son drinks water and milk only and I would be furious if someone gave him a taste for a sugary substitute which wasn't necessary, especially before he is old enough to understand that it is a treat only and not something which he will get on a regular basis. When children are older, they can grasp the concept of an occasional treat, but at your daughter's age it's just so unnecessary.

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thebody · 10/07/2013 12:19

Yes when mine were little esp pfb this would have driven me mad as well.

Now well it's just juice, its not devils sperm. ovcadional drinks dont rit the teeth, occasionally given by gran then it doesn't matter in the grand scheme if things does it. You just give water or milk so that's what he gets the majority if the time.

If this 'boils your piss' then you gonna have one hell of a freakin shock further down the parenthood road.

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eccentrica · 10/07/2013 12:33

My daughter was great with water at this age but now she'll only drink it if it has ice! Enjoy the non-fussy bit Grin

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AmandaPandtheTantrumofDoom · 10/07/2013 12:35

I would be very pissed off if my mother undermined a parenting decision I had made in that way. Not so much because of juice (what the hell is baby juice by the way? When mine started having juice it was just watered down fruit juice) but because your decisions as a parent should be respected.

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SmiteYouWithThunderbolts · 10/07/2013 12:39

The juice itself is neither here nor there IMO. The issue is that your DM went against your express wishes, which I would find disrespectful and annoying.

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Justforlaughs · 10/07/2013 12:41

What AmandaPandtheTantrumofDoom said!

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ifyourehoppyandyouknowit · 10/07/2013 12:41

This would drive me mad. You've said no to juice. It's not like it makes any difference to her whether she gives the baby water or juice. So why would she buy it?

I'm really pfb about juice. I just don't let DS (18m) have anything over than water or milk.

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Inertia · 10/07/2013 12:49

YANBU. Your mum got to make parenting decisions when she had her own children, she doesn't get to override yours.

Babies only need milk or water to drink- why run the risk of damage to teeth for no good reason? At 10mo, your baby can have actual fruit which would be far more beneficial.

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manitz · 10/07/2013 12:50

yeah, my mum does a lot of thing i don't like with my kids - chupa chups being one. but as others have said in the grand scheme of things it's not much, it's more about power.

I did start giving my pfb (now 10) juice with meals in an open cup and watered down because she was very little, struggled to put on weight and allergic to dairy etc. I heard that vitamin c helps to absorb iron so at that point I thought that was important. Never in a cup with a lid though my youngest (20 months) is allowed at toddler group, just not from me. as the youngest of 4 he has a lot of things my first did and it's not just my mum who is a bad influence.

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manitz · 10/07/2013 12:52

I may be wrong but I think baby juice is watered down fruit juice like apple etc. I have found it is more expensive than normal juice!!

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ChunkyPickle · 10/07/2013 12:55

If you prefer no juice, then no problem - your mum needs to listen to that.

BUT

I will say that DS (nearly 3) has gone through phases of drinking juice since he was about the same age (I water it down, I'm pretty sure MIL doesn't), but still prefers milk generally or water in hot weather so it's not necessarily a path to ruin!

I think that at least at first DS found the sweetness closer to the breast milk he was used to, whereas now he's weaned he's happy more savoury tastes

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gotthemoononastick · 10/07/2013 13:00

My daughter believes sugary and fruit drinks are the devil.I would not dream of thwarting her by buying them.Neither would I put a thing into her child's mouth without asking her if it is O.K first.It is called respect.I need her to trust me with her precious child.

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