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Sorry, another parking one. Who is being unreasonable here?(89 Posts)
We have lived in our house for 8 years. Small cul-de-sac with some parking at the end near our house. For all the time we have lived here, DH and I have parked in the same spots- in the 2 spaces nearest the houses. Never has there been any trouble with parking.
New neighbours have just moved in next door and suddenly I have been pushed out of my parking space. The bloke asked me earlier if I could move my car over so his wife could park nearest the house, as it is easier for them to get the young kids out of the car.
I did move it, but when his wife came home I went out and said I felt it was a bit off to suddenly be asked to park elsewhere just because they wanted that space. They argued that it was because of getting the kids in and out (baby and 3 year old), and said as mine are older (5) it is easier for me to park over the other side of the close.
I realise this sounds extremely petty, and there is no reason that I can't park elsewhere. It is after all a public road, and no one owns the spaces. It just really annoys me that I have been pushed out of my parking space by people who have only lived here a week. I wouldn't dream of moving into a new street and turfing someone else out of a space they had parked in for 8 years.
So, am I being unreasonable to feel so put out by this? Or are the new neighbours unreasonable for coming in and disrupting our long standing parking arrangements?
Chocolate and wine for anyone who hasn't yet died of boredom!
But you haven't been turfed out.
They asked you to park somewhere else and you agreed.
Then you later thought better of it and thought they were cheeky to even ask so will presumably park wherever you want to now. Whoever gets their first will get the space.
I'm in my second end of cul-de-sac home with space for parking in the turning circles. Everyone has drives, but some houses have more cars than off-street parking (lots of adult children still at home). People do generally have "their" space, but life happens and iit's not a guarentee that you'll get in, but no one would ask to move an already parked car unless there was an obstruction (not mild inconvenience)
Our current drive has parking that accommodates our cars. Car 1 can turn, but car 2 then has to reverse off (long shared drive with 90o turn- not easy) we then have to use the turning circle to drive in the right direction. We've made a general request to our neighbour who parks 2 of their 4 cars in the turning circle to aim to keep them to one side keeping the gap in the simplest spacing for us to turn. It makes manouvering much easier for us, but no difference to their distance from the house. The only time we've requested a move was when a son parked on the other side that left access off the drive rather tight- this was when I was 39+ wks pg ( I'd already been to hospital with warning signs of labour starting) and reversing off the drive at silly o'clock in the morning was a real possibility- due care and attention may not have been DH's strong point for avoiding a random awkward car!
Because his hose isn't long enough, Rebecca
OP-if you park close when you want to-why can't your husband move your car when he gets in & put his van there?
If you're the one who usually has the kids in your car why doesn't your husband park over the road?
YABU. Your 5 year old is easier to unload from the car than a baby and toddler.
The neighbours were very rude asking you to move your car, we have on street parking though and more cars per house than room for them outside the house. usually one of us paks outside our house and one over the road (where there is always space) leaving the spaces outside the neighbours' houses free for them.
Sometimes we get home a a visitor is parked outside our house or one of the neighbours. We just accept it and park elsewhere.
If a neighbour never left room for our car I would think them selfish and say something, maybe that is what happened here.
You are not being unreasonable - some of the above posts are just ridiculous and predictable. You and your neighbour have just as much right to the space - first come, first served, and no need for you to park elsewhere and leave the space for them
I have already said I realise I was being unreasonable. It is nothing to do with parking further away, where I used to park was not even the space closest to my house. I have been having a bit of a crap time lately, and just blew everything out of proportion when the neighbours asked me to move my car. I am well aware it is petty, so now am parking elsewhere and leaving the space for them.
It is certainly nothing to do with not wanting my kids to walk an extra few feet, they do plenty of walking anyway.
Exactly how much further away is the spot you have been asked to park in? 10m, 20m?
I nannied one year for three boys aged 2 (was 18 months when I started) 3 and 4 and managed to walk with them to the bus stop (I didn't drive) and get them all on with a buggy and shopping. I think some people are being a bit lame.
Take the bus.
All these kids should be able to walk down the street. It is good for them to get out more.
Why don't you park where your husband likes to park and then if there is space when he comes home he can park where you like to. In the meantime if someone else parks there he can always switch your and his car around so he can fill his tanks.
Or alternatively come to some arrangement with the new neighbours or buy a longer hose.
I think YABU. You want a guaranteed spot for your husband and his hose but think they are BU to want one because of their small children.
Either it's a free for all (and your dh loses out occasionally if your car and their car are in the spaces) or you compromise with them and you park on the other side to guarantee your dh gets the other space.
heh, it sucks but- that's life. I (seethe and swear) feel a bit put out when anyone has the end space where I normally park - especially if it is not one of the 'regulars' as we all sort of park in the same spots, without talking about it and I have to remind myself I don't own the space. (even if I did vow to piss it up and down to mark it!!)
I don't think you're being unreasonable, but unfortunately there isn't much you can do about it if it's first come first served and not designated.
The trouble is that because you have been able to park quite happily there for years, in your mind it's become 'yours' and now some one has come along in effect and used your space!
I think either you'll just have to come to an amicable arrangement with the new neighbours that suits you both, but if they don't cooperate in the way you would like you're just going to have to change your way of thinking to along them lines of "well, we have been very lucky over the last eight years, and it has been handy parking there when the kids were tiny but now things have changed so we have to get along with the new arrangement......"
YABU it is first come, first served. If they don't like the parking situation then why did they move there ( as my husband once said to one of our neighbours)!
Can you tell it really annoys me?
They are cheeky as hell.
I am lucky to get a spot out the front of my house and currently there are at least five cars in the street that have just been parked, left and not moved for over a week by goodness knows who- I did see a well dressed couple the other day get into their car with a suitcase- obviously they have been on a holiday and left it in one of the last "free streets to park" that is near busses and trains in London, rather than pay for parking elsewhere.
I still though would never dream of asking anyone to move their car or keep out of "my spot".
which does not exist unfortunately even though it can be a real struggle having to park around the corner.
I would just ignore the issue and park there when it's free. I think they are BVU.
But I would try and be friendly with them in general because it's worth being on good terms with neighbours.
Seriously? Clearly the baby-and-toddler on your own is tough. And its a cul-de-sac? I live in central London. We consider ourselves lucky if the space is anywhere nearby, and I use the double buggy if on my own!
Two of our neighbours have a similar parking thing - they both have 3 cars, one neighbour has a 2 car drive and the other has a garage and a 1 car drive - they do all sorts of passive aggressive bits and bobs in the area which is actually supposed to be for turning. I'm just glad we're not involved! Although OP, I have to say, if someone parks in 'my' space (I park on the road, directly outside our house) I get a bit narked, even though it is on road parking and not actually mine in the slightest. So YABU, but I would be too! I realise that's no help whatsoever!
YABU to expect to have two places right near your house!
Am I the only one who has never found getting a toddler plus baby in and out of the car a problem?
Throw a party and make friends with all of your neighbours.
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