Mumsnet Talk

You may be a teensy weensy bit hormonal and utterly barking

In the time you wrote that post, you could have printed off the photos. It sounds like you are being a bit controlling and that dh was trying to keep you both happy. My fil spent ages printing off pictures and I was touched when I saw the huge folder he'd compiled over the years. However I do appreciate you have your hands full and constant nagging to do something is very off putting. At least it's done now, and hopefully the inlaws will stop mithering.

And babies do change an enormous amount in the first 3 months.

Your dh was trying to help maybe his dad had nagged him too.
I fairness, on your terms was making him wait. I can't really see the point in not being accommodating to other peoples requests.
However, fil/mil obviously and rightly piss you off and I too think your dh should speak to them about respect. Its a 2 way thing though, I treat my pils far different than I did my parents as totally different characters.
Finally I will add, my mum never got to see my graduation photo's (v. mature student). She was so looking forward to getting her copy. She died the day before I was due to take them over. I had them for 2 weeks prior to this. Maybe your ils are just longing for photos.

3 MONTHS. OP YABU...

It sounds like you made the task a bit too complicated, and it built up to be a big thing. Why did you buy a frame? He only wanted photos.

Has he got email? Can't you just forward some photos and let him print them off?

YABU for being annoyed at your dh.

Sorry. I think you are a bit.

Your father in law wanted a nice pic of his grandson. He's been asking for three months. You have other things to get on with and haven't got round to it. He's pissing you off. Your husband thought you know what, I'll solve the problem. Here are some pics, he can stop asking and she can stop being pissed off.

Three months. I mean, I'd be more leaning towards you not being at all unreasonable if we were talking a week or two but three months?

He's being really ridiculous about it now though. Petty and I suspect a bit nose off to spite face.

YABU, but understandably so having just had a baby, moved house and everything else. Let your DH give the photos to your FIL and move on.

YABVu I'm afraid!

You need to relinquish some control, thereis nothing unusual about family wanting pictures of dgc and waiting 3 months is a long time tbh!

A picture of a newborn is lovely but they grow so quickly and some people like to have more up to date photos. Maybe they want to show off their dgc to their friends.

Give your DH and his family a break, life is too short.

Bloody hell, what a fuss. The poor man wants a photo of his grandchild and in 3 months you haven't been able to get your act together to get him one, so your husband steps in, gets photo done, gets FIL off your back and makes him happy. And your problem is?

You're bonkers.

If your dc is 3 months old and you gave FIL a newborn photo, you can kind of see his point, can't you? And you only gave him that after much prompting...

YABU, your DD was trying to help and you bit his head off. If i was him i would be pissed off with you.

FIL got his pictures, you're no longer getting pestered, win win. I really don't see how or why you could be angry.

Fil - 'Can I have some recent photos of dc2 please?'
Twitchy - 'Of course you can, dh will print some off, just ask him'.

Why didn't the above conversation happen months ago?

Also as your dh was aware of your annoyance at constantly being reminded why didn't he print some off weeks ago? The fact that he has gone ahead and done it now should be a time for rejoicing not getting the hump.

If you are still having difficulties from the birth then stop moving boxes etc. that's what dhs are for.

YABU. Your FIL wanted a photo of his grandchild, which is nice. He's been asking for 3 months so he's obviously really keen to have one. Agree with GwendolineMary TBH. What was the problem in actually printing one off for him? Would have taken five minutes. And what the heck is the problem now DH has done it for you? Why did it have to be 'on your terms?' I think you need to grovel a bit to DH actually. I can see why he's fuming with you.

You sound precious and he sounds overbearing, either communicate the problems you have with them or suck it up!

I am totally confused. This is a gp who lives close to his gc, visits often. Why is he hassling his DIL for photos? Can he not just bring his own camera with him when he visits? Why is it up to his DIL to provide photos?

OP I think you should demand photos of your FIL's dog, or garden or something. And keep making sarcastic remarks until you get them. And then complain they're taken from the wrong angle.

YABU and completely controlling.

think you didn't really want him to have the photos did you.

"the only time FIL comes to see DC2 is when its DC1's bedtime... I am sahm and therefore free during the day for vists but on the few occassions FIL has visited, its has always been around bedtime for DC1" - as your DH is more likely to be around at bedtime? I don't think FIL should be sarcastic to you at all, but you do seem to be giving off vibes that suggest it might be uncomfortable to visit you in the day as you appear very hostile to him.

3 months is an unreasonable length of time to wait. Presumably you had time to get them Xmas presents, but not a photo? I don't think "nice frames" are necessary, just a normal 5 x 3 print would have been adequate...

Oh, and next time they visit, get them to move some boxes for you!

You were a bit too ambitious with the print and framebusiness. However, after you got the newborn photo together with the frame, I would have followed up with just some emailed some photos - not another print.

On another note, his and MIL's awkward timings would piss me off. Feel free to tell them not to come round if it's going to be at bedtime!

Sorry But it's another YABU from me. Maybe, FIl was being pushy but just give the guy some photos. (or ask your DH). I feel a bit sorry for your DH.

I guess there is a lot more history to this ill feeling. This doesn't bode well for the future

BTW, do you have a photo printer, or did you/DH have to go to a printer's (accounting for the expense)?

Sorry, YABU. As above.

Molehill -> Mountain

Your FIL is clearly somewhat objectionable, and I can understand you being annoyed about the disparity between how they treat you and your family compared to your SIL.

But - your DH took the job off your hands and now you are moaning at him? I think you are being harsh.