Mumsnet Talk

You are right fergus

Some very heartless and unfeeling so and so's on here.

Let's hope they never have to understand how losing a close relative to suicide feels like. I'm sure if they did their attitude would change.

Lack of compassion on this thread is staggering. Those of you criticising her suicide notes should be ashamed of assasinating her character on the back of the last communication written in the darkest and final hours of her life. Let her rest in peace ffs.

They provoked a vulnerable person. Whether they knew she was vulnerable or not is irrelevant. People need to have respect and consideration for other humans.

there's no shame and no blame. These new developments put a different perspective on it.

Ooh Susannah you're a peach aint ya? Bet in the light of recent news update you couldn't wait to rush to this thread to say "I told you so".

There is no blame either.

And susannah what shame exactly has she brought on those children?

There is no shame in suicide.

IMO it makes it even worse. Poor vulnerable woman. Upon reading a few comments here and other places online, I think...big fucking society my arse.

Despicable thing to say. ' doubts about the woman ' fucking hell.

Well I had my doubts about the woman right from the word go, and I still maintain that, given what we have now learnt, that she was most likely to have killed herself sooner or later.

It was said she died of shame, but what about the shame she brought on her poor children? Far far worse imo than the 'shame' of being caught out in a hoax.

So so wrong to blame the DJs.

So.

It's not a given she would have ways killed herself.

WE do know she had attempted suicide on two previous occasions - the last time less than a year ago.

We do know she was on medication

we do know she had received psychiatric treatment was marked down as a risk of making further suicide attempts.

And you've no idea it isn't.

...you've no idea if that's true.

Sounds like a very unhinged woman who was always going to kill herself. The fact she left notes blaming people also shows her - in my view - to not be a particularly nice person either.

So what if she had deep rooted problems.

This fucking prank pushed her over.

so the nurse had deep-seated problems all along. Not surprised in the least.

Amber- I am sorry for the loss of your relative and I think it has coloured your views on this subject. Again, your case is completely different to what has happened here

Thanks, yes Im sure it has coloured my views, to the point where I just don't think things like this are ever that simple and that it is very very wrong to blame a person for anothers choice to take their life.

Ive just read that Jacintha Saldanha had previously tried to take her own life on two occasions.

That confirms as far as I am concerned that she was already very troubled and while the DJs prank was wrong it is wrong to blame them for her death.

A very merry Chrsitmas to one and all on here!

I hope everyone survives with their sanity intact!!

I can't see why any suicide notes 'blaming' the DJs or the hospital management put a different slant on anything and, frankly, calling it 'vile' as just as vile as those who are calling for the DJ's blood.

Whether or not Jacintha had mental health issues, it was always obvious that the prank call made by the DJs, the subsequent reaction of her employers and the mass media was the catalyst in her decision to take her own life.
The notes have only confirmed this. They show how angry and upset she was about the whole thing. Not sure why this is surprising to anyone.

I don't see that many (if any) on this thread have suggested that this makes the DJs responsible for her death. Most people have just said that they do not sympathise with them and that they came across v poorly in the interview. They were very childish, selfish and stupid to try to make a prank call to a hospital but they are are not responsible for the tragic outcome here.

Personally, I can't stand this relatively new concept, perpetuated by the media (and the lawyers) that someone must be to blame if something goes wrong.
It is negative and unproductive.
What is useful is for the DJs, the radio station, the hospital management, the royals, etc to look at what happened without pointing fingers and try to learn from mistakes that were made in the decision making processes throughout.

wannabe- I can't see any similarity at all between the Adam Lanza murders and subsequent suicide nor your friend and her boyfriend and what has happened in this case. They are completely and utterly different in every way.
Amber- I am sorry for the loss of your relative and I think it has coloured your views on this subject. Again, your case is completely different to what has happened here.

wannabe:
'And no, it is not a "fact" that someone doesn't have to be mentally unstable to kill themselves - it is an opinion.'

but you have mis quoted what was said wannabe.
This is what festively said:
'FYI, opinions aside, it is not the case that a person who commits suicide must necessarily have had a pre existing mental health problem.
This is not an opinion, simply a statement of fact.'

which is different.

Mentally 'unstable', whatever that means is NOT the same as having a history of mental health problems.

"except for the blackmailing kind." but how can we know that the blackmail isn't also just desperation? especially if the blackmailer is prepared to follow through?

The notes have been mentioned in the press.

echt - the djs may be responsible for upsetting her - but they're not responsible for her choice to take her own life. It's a responsibility issue that's being discussed - not a blaming of the victim.

Where are these notes?

I haven't seen anything about them. Just stuff about them on here.

Finding it hard to believe the blaming of the victim here.

Suicide is not senseless, not to the person doing it. Patronising twaddle. It makes complete sense to them. The effect on loved ones is quite different. The use of selfish as a blanket criticism is unhelpful. Suicide is essentially self-ish in that it's about the self, but not necessarily nasty, except for the blackmailing kind.