My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

AIBU?

To hate 'the wife'?

88 replies

cheekybaubles · 23/11/2012 11:29

AIBU to have a go at DH because he addressed me as 'the wife' to someone else? I mean did I wake up this morning in the 1980's during an episode of Boon or something? Urgh!

OP posts:
Report
DreamingOfTheMaldives · 23/11/2012 11:32

YA definitely NBU.

I absolutely detest 'the wife!!!' It is so derogatory. My husband knows that he would refer to me as that, on pain of certain death.

Report
Purple2012 · 23/11/2012 11:35

I wouldnt be happy to be referred to as 'the wife'. Although my husband does sometimes call me 'the commanding officer' in a jokey way.

Report
PseudoBadger · 23/11/2012 11:36

What about 'the missus' :o

Report
PerryCombover · 23/11/2012 11:36

I hate all that. Yanbu

Report
NoraGainesborough · 23/11/2012 11:36

Yanbu. as its your husband referring to you

However some people don't mind or even like it. I have never got people who hate the phrase when used by someone elses husband.

I also know women that refer to 'him indoors' or 'the husband'.

Report
Startail · 23/11/2012 11:38

My Dmother, who has been married almost 50 years would kill my Dfather if he called her that.

YANBU

Report
Dogsmom · 23/11/2012 11:38

I like it (clearly in minority) I couldn't wait to get married and be his wife, there are much worse things to be called.

Report
WorraLiberty · 23/11/2012 11:38

Not fussed really

It does make me laugh though if a male poster dares to post that on here

Cue 50+ posts from people moaning about it and totally ignoring whatever problem he was posting about.

Report
BumbleBee2011 · 23/11/2012 11:39

My DH calls me 'R Lass when talking to strangers, (he tends to go all "Northern").

Always makes me think of the dog Lassie.

Report
AbigailAdams · 23/11/2012 11:40

YANBU. You are not an object, you are a person.

Report
Longtalljosie · 23/11/2012 11:41

"My wife" - no problem.
"The wife" - awful. What are you, an inanimate object?

Report
WelshMaenad · 23/11/2012 11:45

Doesn't bother me at all. How many of us regularly refer to "the kids"? Different how?

Report
Chandon · 23/11/2012 11:45

"the wife" or "the missus" = LTB!

Report
cheekybaubles · 23/11/2012 11:45

I have no problem with 'my wife', although thinking about it does that make me a possession too? Hmm
It is just 'the' I object to.
I have asked him several times not to call me that but he has a brain like a doily.

OP posts:
Report
cheekybaubles · 23/11/2012 11:46

If I LTB I will be 'the x wife' but at least I won't have to hear it Grin

OP posts:
Report
DreamingOfTheMaldives · 23/11/2012 11:50

Dogsmum - my wife is fine. I just really hate 'the wife.'

Report
GambasAndCava · 23/11/2012 12:31

A friend of mine always refers to her DH as 'the husband' which is unusual and sounds weird, therefore illustrating that 'the wife' is perhaps derogatory.

I always find that men who refer to 'the wife' are usually the ones who also says they are 'getting a pass' when they talk about going out drinking etc without their wives, trying to give the impression that they are unfairly under the thumb and shouldn't be expected to take part in family life etc.

Report
PinsAndNoodles · 23/11/2012 13:06

My bugbear is "my/the other half".

My DP says it a lot and it makes me cringe. I hate referring to people just by their status in a couple - bleurgh.

Report
pumpkinsweetie · 23/11/2012 13:11

Yanbu-"The Wife" i think, sounds very much like your the property of the man iyswim.

Report
Alliwantisaroomsomewhere · 23/11/2012 13:15

Not bothered by it at all.

Report
samandi · 23/11/2012 13:40

Well "the wife" sounds a bit like a functional thing rather than a relation. "The wife" is someone who carries out certain duties (around the home), like perhaps "the receptionist" or "the plumber". It also sounds pretty chavvy.

Report
Mynewmoniker · 23/11/2012 13:46

Not as bad as John McKrickric (sp?) calling his wife 'Booby' but I still don't like it and my DH NEVER calls me that.

Report

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

MistletoeAndTomHardyPlease · 23/11/2012 13:48

DH calls me 'the wife' and 'the Mrs', doesn't bother me at all.

Report
Merrycuckingfistmas · 23/11/2012 13:49

I get called 'the Mississ' all the time wouldn't mind but were not even married!

Report
Hammy02 · 23/11/2012 13:52

Its better than 'current wife'. Wink

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.