Mumsnet Talk

<peers at 2p in holiday jar>

Come on! We can do better than that. I am entitled to a holiday.

<Flings M&S Spice, Iced Buns>

<Flings self after them to retrieve them>

I am utterly offended by everything on this thread. You are all bullies and you have made me cry!!

<goat smashes into head as ninja reflexes fail>

<<flings goat poo instead>>

<<<ducks to avoid narked>>>

<lobs a teacher and some pampas grass>

I think all women should breastfeed. Women who formula feed are selfish horrible women with no shame. Why doesn't anyone tell them BREAST IS BEST. BREAST IS BEST.

You are all being really passive aggressive, I hate you all, have a instead of buns and goats.

<strokes goat collection>
All of youse who don't buy goats with your benefits are fuckin lezzers.
Yer. Lezzers.
Lezzers who kill babies and smoke craven A and think that Eric is hotter than Alcide.

<chucks chelsea buns indiscriminately>

<<<eats babees>>>

>takes 2p back<

Call that intetled, sheeeesh

<<pats direct cow>>

And why has no-one mentioned the bullying of the poor goat?

we are not allowed to be nasty now. We have to say 'you sound like an arse and here's a compelling argument why' And TBH that is soooo much less fun than saying you are a twat that no one is bothering so it seems

You are a twat Fanny

<waits to see if universe is realonged>

my name is Funnys, if you don't mind, and I'm reporting yo ass for that PA

AND

I have more bedrooms than I need, will I be moving? Will I fuck.

<gathers in more taxpayer dosh, spends it in Boden on stuff I don't need>

The goat had it comin' MaryZed

It was giving me evils.

<reports everyone including the goat>

<loads goats into a deHavilland, goatbombs Devon>

Report THAT, TessCowDirect!

<<brings in the heavilly artillered cows>>

>loads cow pats<

>>sets target on on twat winkstans<<

Is that DA enough for ya

mwhahahahahahahaahaaahaaaahaaaaahaaaaaaa

No buns here - just some naice pastries. Tea anyone?

Mmmmm, carbs......

Stop goading me Ivana , you know I'm on a diet.

Oooooo tea

<unloads weapons of poo destruction>

<relaxes>

[siiiiiiiiiiiighs]

<<parks goat in C+P parking space, swishes immaculate hair and puts Grand Theft Auto on for DCs>>

You A All BU. And bullies. And wrong!

And doesn't anyone think of the children??

<<throws Pombears>>

Oh FFS what's the matter with you?

You just could of started one..... (like that! )

It was very quiet on MN last night though.

No laundering kittens or fanjo boils or anything fun.

(That ought do do it )

Youv al splet evryfing rong nd yer grammmer s shirt!

YPMYallSLAA

I'm waiting for a good opportunity to use it (and expect to be summarily told off).