To think that being on Mumsnet is actually making me a better person?

[samstown]

Have been on Mumsnet for about a year and a half now, and had a little boy about 5 months ago. I really think that having access to so many different views on things from people from all walks of life is really making me a much more compassionate and understanding person! My opinion has changed on lots of things, in particular women's issues such as rape and the sex industry (although the actual feminist section is still terrifying!), and it is so good to see such a range of views on current topics. Sometimes if I am discussing an issue with someone in real life and they trot out some cliched answer I think 'well you are obviously not a mumsnetter, because if you were you would have thought about things more carefully than that'!

I do think that having my son has also changed me as well and is making me a lot less judgemental. For example I used to be quite judgy about formula feeding, until I found myself cracking open the Aptamil at 3 weeks because I hated breastfeeding so much! But I do love coming on here and seeing the 'mumsnet view' on things.

So thanks guys, long many it continue!

[Waxtart]

Finding mumsnet was one of the best things I ever did as a mum. It has helped over the years with no end of worries, queries and definitely in terms of seeing other points of view. It's also helped make me much more confident as a parent. I can remember breezing through all sorts of stages (in terms of knowing or understanding what I was doing or trying to do) because I could come here for back up, knowledge and experience - whereas the others in my peer group at the time struggled at times and only had the HV to refer to.

Plus they thought I was odd for having imaginary friends, and how shocked were they when I actually went on a night out to meet them! I'm still friends with my local mumsnetters now, but no longer in touch with anyone from the group.

[viagrafalls]

I feel the same - YANBU!

[aldiwhore]

YANBU.

There can be a flip side though, you can actually feel like some decisions you make are wrong even if they're not.

If it makes you think about things in a more informed way, then its a good experience.

[NinkyNonker]

I agree. I like to think I question things more, and am more open minded. I grew up in quite a sheltered, privileged family and had quite set opinions taken from my parents, I'm glad these have been challenged.

Likewise I am more 'fiesty' and enlightened in my views in sexism, feminism etc.

But, I do conversely find myself being a bit more judgemental in my head sometimes, because I am more aware if issues, parenting styles etc.

[everybodyfreeze]

I totally agree.

I tend to really take on board what people have to say on here as I can't just 'butt in' and not listen properly the way I may in a real conversation iykwim.

[Boomerwang]

I've only been posting and reading for a few days but I love it here and I really have broadened my knowledge of pregnancy and parenting. I also love reading the good stories and putting myself in the position of others. It's of great benefit to myself, I think.

[Boomerwang]

Oh, plus I get big round greedy eyes whenever I see a bit of drama going on. :D

[runningwilde]

I like seeing different points of view
Although I am still judgey about formula feeding in most cases...

[BelfastBloke]

Sometimes a consensus develops on a thread which I would imagine would make it difficult to give enough weight to the posters who are saying something different.

For example on a "leave him" thread, there might be a couple of posters who are understanding the nuances of the situation better, have read the OP more closely, but because they are only a couple of voices in an onslaught of advice in a particular direction, it's difficult to give 'hear' them.

[BelfastBloke]

*it's difficult to 'hear' them.

[CheerfulYank]

I adore Mumsnet. It's one of my very favorite things and I don't know what I'd do without and I don't feel fully American anymore. :o

It brings a lot of things to my attention and also makes me feel better about myself...when you're typing instead of talking, you have more time to be kind, to really think of what it is you're trying to say. I like that.

[msjudgeypants]

I am both a better person, and a better parent.

(darlings, bugger off and leave mummy alone with her AIBUs - go play in the street or something, there's a bunfight going on)

A MUCH better parent.

[samstown]

Although I am still judgey about formula feeding in most cases...

Yes I had gathered that runningwilde

[everybodyfreeze]

It ilcan be a double edge sword though. People keep their judgey-ness to themselves for the most part irl but on here you are likely to hear some extreme opinions on a number of things which isn't necessarily the best thing if you are a bit sensitive or vulnerable about any decisions you might have made.

[RevoltingPeasant]

I know people will find this odd, but actually being on MN has helped me to make the decision to ttc.

You can see other people all over the country - just - I don't know - coping - and it makes the idea of parenthood feel so much more... familiar.

I mean, I know it'll hit me like a tonne of bricks, but still. I have some false confidence going in

[everybodyfreeze]

It can be a double edge sword though. People keep their judgey-ness to themselves for the most part irl but on here you are likely to hear some extreme opinions on a number of things which isn't necessarily the best thing if you are a bit sensitive or vulnerable about any decisions you might have made. Formula feeding being a good example

[BuenTiempo]

There can be a flip side though, you can actually feel like some decisions you make are wrong even if they're not.

agree, and there is a lot of browbeating so that you tow the accepted line

[everybodyfreeze]

Sorry for posting twice, am blaming my phone. Also aldiwhore said it already better than me!

[runningwilde]

Revoltingpeasant - best 'o luck with your baby-making! And lol at your optimism! Yeah it will hit you like a shit load ton but it's all good! Just rembe to listen to loads of advice, take the bits you like and discard the rest! X