To change my holiday plans?

[Earlybird]

Bit of background: we are going on holiday in July. A friend is going on holiday in mid-June. She has suggested that we start our holiday a week earlier, in order to join them at their villa outside Nice. After that week, we would then go on our originally planned break.

This seemed like a good idea at the time, and my work is flexible enough to allow this option. Of course, we would have extra flight costs, but accomodation would be free, so I agreed.

Friend called about a month ago, and asked me to delay booking our flights as their plans are changing for various work/family reasons. She then asked if we could come to them a few days earlier than planned. Not a problem.

She now tells me their holiday plans have shifted 2 weeks earlier, and wants me to shift our time too (not very convenient, but possible - if flights aren't ludicrously high by now). SA few days later, she drops the bombshell that instead of a quiet week with them in the mountains with a few leisurely day trips, she wants us to come with them to Paris where her dh has business......oh, and don't worry, she'll pay for our Paris hotel.

I am rapidly losing interest - both in their constantly changing dates/plans, and the fact that our extra week with them is now morphing into something else entirely - and not at all what i originally agreed to.

She seems to think that we'll be happy to 'be flexible' - especially has she has offered to pay for the Paris hotel. I am inclined to tell her that we'll stick to our original plan.

She won't be happy, i know. What would you do/say, and aibu?

[shortround]

I think i would lie and say i have work commitments and realy cant change plans again.

[popserinis]

I would tell her to forget it, she shouldn't be mucking you around like this. If she commited to something at the start she should have stuck to it. Seems like she is pulling all the strings and you need to come along for the ride.

What seemed like a relaxing week is now turning into a hectic holiday with lots of mucking around on your part.

Stick with your original plan

[Dozer]

Yanbu, just have the holiday without them, would be fine to be honest with her, but if you can't face that just claim work issues with getting the leave or something.

[YellowDinosaur]

YANBU.

While she might be paying for your accommodation its not reasonable to think that you will do exactly what they want for YOUR holiday. I'd also be concerned that the goalposts will move again (and again and again...) so who knows what will eventually happen with your holiday.

[Earlybird]

Hmm.

Quite honestly, the idea of tearing 'round Paris is not appealing. I agreed to a quiet week mooching around a medieval walled village, having a swim in their pool, with lots of lovely food, wine and conversation.

She's already said she can't wait to go shopping in Paris - which does not interest me in the slightest. Museums, galleries and general sightseeing would be top of our list - which presumably don't interest her/her dd very much.

I think the paying for our Paris hotel would also = feeling indebted/obligated to her in a way I wouldn't if we were guests at their villa.