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AIBU?

To feel put out at the lack of an invite back for ds

19 replies

ghostfreak · 25/02/2011 22:07

Ds has two closest freinds at school that he get on with well.
I arrange a fair bit for these two freinds to come on playdates at our house.
Ds is 10.
During this half term break I helped the one out because she was working and I had her ds for the whole day from 8.00am until 6.30pm and he also ended up staying overnight at the boys request.
I took him back the next day at 6.00pm as she his mom was again at work.
During this time I took them out and about and spent money on them my choice I know.
His other mate we had over night and me and dh took them both out etc.
ds has not had a single invite from them during the holiday at all.
I have always told myself that I shouldn,t expect its just the way it is but for some reason I feel really upset biy it on htis occasion aibu I suspect I probably am.

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nailak · 25/02/2011 22:09

how could sh invite him if she is working? nd the holiday is only 1 week so mayb had other family commitmments and stuff planned....

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dexifehatz · 25/02/2011 22:11

You've just been had love.If they ask for any other help tell them to piss off.

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ghostfreak · 25/02/2011 22:12

Yes I do appreciate that she works all week but not at weekends.
and she did have a day off in the week she had said that ds could come over that day but the invite never came.

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ghostfreak · 25/02/2011 22:14

I just feel that on this particular occasion one of them could have spared a couple of hours for ds to go to theirs

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MorticiaAddams · 25/02/2011 22:14

I think yabu to expect an invite back to quickly. Half term is only a week and they have already spent two days together. Perhaps mum will invite your ds somewhere at Easter.

Lots of people like to keep the weekends free and not have anything planned especially if they work all week.

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ghostfreak · 25/02/2011 22:18

perhaps so I am probably a bit of a mug as I have had ds's freinds over when I have been at work. I work casual hours and when ds is at school I am working fulltime and part time in school holidays but I always invite ds's freinds over.
But then I know not everyone is like me.

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ghostfreak · 25/02/2011 22:20

Morticia its a similar situation in the long summer holidays I am convinced that nobody would get in touch and invite ds over.
I don,t understand where I am going wrong.
They always seem happy to come here when asked.

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ChaoticAngelofAnarchy · 25/02/2011 22:20

Give it time, that invitation may well come in the next couple of weeks, or as MorticiaAddams says at Easter.

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mmsmum · 25/02/2011 22:21

I'd wait until the next holiday and see what happens. It's too quick to invite back yet.

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AgentZigzag · 25/02/2011 22:25

I'd try not to think about it as if they don't invite your DS back they're somehow snubbing you and him.

Peoples lives are complicated, and hopefully they don't have the impression that an invite back is expected, that you asked their DC over because you didn't mind and your DS enjoyed it.

Were you just helping out the mum whose DS was over all day, and she asked you?

If that's the case it's not really an invite but rather a favour.

Not sure whether that makes any difference though Grin

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SeeJaneKick · 25/02/2011 22:31

You'll have to let it go. I regularly have DDs friends over to play and have tea and she rarely gets asked back because the parents work constantly. They do ask her on weekend days out sometimes though....but it's not worth getting upset about....I remember full well when I was growing up....our house was the one all the kids came to....because my Mum let them...it was great being the kid with the fun Mum who had time for us.

Let it go...one Mum was so worried about not being able to invite my DD over that she explained it to me and I totally brushed it off...people have busy lives.

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SeeJaneKick · 25/02/2011 22:33

ghost...a lot can't be bothered...it's fine though..wen they getolder we're redundant anyway. Might aswell enjoy being part of their social lives while we can!

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ghostfreak · 25/02/2011 22:35

I find it so dissapointing I think its nice when they have freinds they get along with but I am doing all the running.

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ghostfreak · 25/02/2011 22:37

She asked me to have him agent but then ended up having him over night as it was what the boys wanted

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Karenc3 · 25/02/2011 22:41

I don't know about this one - I very rarely let mine invite other kids over (All be it they are 6,4,and 1) with me I feel my kids behave but whenever I have had other peoples over I must admit it put me off for life!
We work and home and our kids (Apart from the 1yr old obviously) know when we are busy, they seem to have a good grasp on this. They respect the house, they do not break things etc etc but with other people's the kids are hyper, have broke things, and ran a muck basically.
Ever thought these parents may have been put off by other kids? Maybe they work at home? Might want to just ask them if he can go over?

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AgentZigzag · 25/02/2011 22:48

I'm not good at having other DC over either (anti-social twat).

But I'd try and see it exclusively through what your DS gets out of it.

He enjoys it, you enjoy seeing him having a laugh, having to supervise them is what you pay for seeing him happy?

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igetmorelovefromthecat · 25/02/2011 22:49

I wouldn't worry at all. This half term DD has been over to play at 2 different friend's houses, but because we have been out and about quite a lot we have not even thought about asking them back. Anyway, it doesn't really work like that with her 2 best friends, they may come over here three times in a row before DD goes to theirs, or vice versa, but that's just how life works out sometimes. It depends what other commitments our various families have. I wouldn't read anything into it, it's not a snub, it probably hasn't even crossed the parents minds that you would expect a return invitation yet.

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Karenc3 · 25/02/2011 22:50

AgentZigZag ah another Anti-Social Twat yey! :) Thought I was the only one lol

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burgerandchipswithredsauce · 25/02/2011 23:50

I have had my DC's friend over here 3 times this week. DC's have been invited to friend only once each. I am just pleased to have their friends over so I do not have to constantly entertain them IYSWIM?

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