to toast, butter then eat a nail file

[pud1]

otherwise i am confused as to why ADSA.com thought this was a sutable substitute for 4x hovis teacakes

[colditz]

PMSL

Honestly I guffawed when I read that.

I thought I was badly off with 200g of posh lardons instead of 600g of megabudget bacon.

[theevildead2]

YABU, and uncultured.

Nail files should only ever be served with clotted cream and jam

[UnquietDad]

Best (worst) substitition I heard of (thankfully not for us, but recounted by delivery guy):

An old lady who had asked for salted peanuts - got a copy of Nuts magazine.

[Tee2072]

Really TED2? I always have mine with honey.

[SeriousWispaHabit]

'Birthday girl' party plates, tablecloth and balloons substituted with 'Birthday Boy'

Lemons substituted with Lemon flash bathroom cleaner.

That was my Tesco order last week.

[GrimmaTheNome]

Its put me right off the idea of buying Hovis teacakes - are they high bran?

[BikeRunSki]

Soya milk substitued with skimmed milk!

[theevildead2]

tee2072

philistine

[DirtyMartini]

Birthday boy for birthday girl! That's an absolute classic.

[pud1]

good to know i am not on my own then. going for a bath now. might use a crumpet for a sponge

[starkadder]

this made me laugh out loud...

[Kaloki]

Heheh excellent!

[Vallhala]

A delivery driver once told me that he'd had to hand over toilet rolls.

The customer had ordered sausage rolls. :o