What have been your 'rock bottom' moments or friends/relatives of alcoholics what was their rock bottom?

(7 Posts)
StrongTeaHotShower Sun 14-Aug-16 18:48:24

I'm hoping I've reached a point where I can start afresh but am not sure if I've reached that fabled 'rock bottom' as I know things could have got much worse than they are now.

Please share your experience smile

Rainbow Mon 15-Aug-16 00:36:58

I was married to an alcoholic for many years. In my case, I always thought I was protecting my children from their father, the DV was always when they weren't around. Mainly because the only time we were around him was when they first got up or went to bed. I tried to keep them out of his way. In was never prolonged violence. He hit me with a stick and that was it or he threw a mug at my head and it was done. I suppose my rock bottom was the day we came home and he had been stewing on something I had or hadn't done, I never found out what, and he was so angry. He grabbed my hair and hit my face against the work top, crossed my hands across my chest and pulled my arms so that I was strangling myself and kicked me. All in front of the children. Although the were a little anxious, they were not overly upset and my then 2yo walked into the garden, picked up a stick and calmly said "Here mummy, hit daddy." I knew at that moment, I hadn't protected them as well as I had thought and I phoned the police.

Why didn't I leave sooner? I had to try and make my marriage work. He went through detox and rehab and all for the wrong reasons. It all failedepends but I had to stand by himy while he tried to get sober.
I don't think you necessarily have to hit 'rock bottom' before doing something about it, you do need to be ready and doing it for you and no other reason.

StrongTeaHotShower Mon 15-Aug-16 10:55:41

Oh that's heartbreaking and terrifying flowers to you for getting through it and changing your situation.

bonjournono Mon 15-Aug-16 11:01:02

My brother's rock bottom moment was when he turned up to our sister's engagement party completely drunk, made a scene with my father, embarrassed my sister in front of her fiance's family and generally just made the whole thing awkward and upsetting. Several people in the family went NC with him after that until he agreed to try and sort himself out. He's doing much better now, thankfully although it took several years to get there.

R3ALLY Wed 24-Aug-16 22:16:23

I keep thinking I've hit the famous rock bottom but yet I'm still with him. This week alone he forgot to collect ds from minder... Lied to my face about drinking... Told me I only ever think of myself oh and the small matter of coming into the bathroom when I was in the shower and brandishing a knife and saying I wasn't going to take his kids away. I need to make a decision soon

SuperHeroesForKids Wed 24-Aug-16 22:22:47

Jesus R3ally- best wishes to you and get out X

R3ALLY Wed 24-Aug-16 22:25:05

Thanks - yeah it does look quite stark written down! He's sobering up now and telling me that he's not bad, he's ill and that he needs my support... I'm seeing a counsellor next week, hoping she'll put it in perspective for me

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