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Adoption

Baby shower when adopting?

14 replies

RosieandJim89 · 24/05/2016 21:36

My cousin has offered to throw us a baby shower just before we adopt and I didn't want to sound rude so accepted. I explained how complicated it could be - having little notice between matching panel and introductions, not knowing what the baby has already and what we will need etc. She is still prepared to do it, especially as we didn't have one for our birth son 4 years ago.
Did anyone else have one? How did it work? Any tips?

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ProfessorPickles · 24/05/2016 21:44

It sounds like a lovely idea, but I agree it could be a little complicated with what to get for the child etc. Maybe say not to bother with presents? As the important part is your friends and family coming together to celebrate and to support you Smile

Or they could put money in a pot to put towards a nice photo album or something for you to add to over the years?

If it's really not for you OP, then let her know!

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Mrscollydog · 24/05/2016 21:44

My friends through us one just before we started intros. We had also missed out on one for our BS due to his prematurity.
It was lovely, just good friends getting together for food, wine and some fun. Presents wise, they gave us vouchers as all knew we wouldn't know what we needed for a while.
Go for it. There are few and far between oppurtunities to get together with everyone once LO arrives!

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Cleo1303 · 24/05/2016 23:08

I didn't have one, but I was overwhelmed by all the New Baby cards and presents that arrived after DD came home. I wasn't expecting it at all and it was a wonderful surprise. Needless to say I've kept all the cards for her when she is older.

I think it's a lovely idea. Why not?

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Italiangreyhound · 24/05/2016 23:15

It's a lovely idea if you want to do it.

My work colleagues gave me one when I went on adoption leave from work. They gave me vouchers, to spend on ds, we had food and fun.

Only do it if you want to, but if you want to, go for it.

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RosieandJim89 · 25/05/2016 22:06

Thanks all. My cousin said Vouchers ad nappies for presents which seems sensible. I think we will probably go ahead as long as DH wants too aswell.

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Cleo1303 · 25/05/2016 23:21

I'm sorry, and at the risk of being shot down in flames, I don't think nappies are appropriate for a baby shower. If this were a birth child I doubt very much if people would give nappies.

I didn't have a baby shower, as I said above, but I had lovely welcome home presents for my daughter which she could use at the time - pretty clothes, cuddly toys - and things she would be able to treasure when she was older. In between there were lovely things like baby mug and bowl sets and she is still using the Jemima Puddleduck bowl for breakfast even though she is now 12! I think it's great that she has some lasting mementos from the start of her life with me because they show how everyone wanted to celebrate her arrival and welcome her.

That is just IMHO of course.

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RosieandJim89 · 26/05/2016 07:23

When my DS was born, we didn't have a shower but people did bring gifts. An enormous bag of nappies was one of the gifts we received and considering how many we went through in the early days I was grateful. This time we won't be getting a newborn obviously but I wouldn't turn down useful gifts.

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Cleo1303 · 26/05/2016 09:26

They are very practical and useful. I just thought it would be shame if too many people brought nappies rather than things DC might like to hear about and treasure when they are older.

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JustHappy3 · 26/05/2016 10:02

Nappies seem totally appropriate. You can pay a lot of money to have them folded up and gift presented especially for baby showers! My lovely friends also offered although in the end it was a rush (intros 2 days after panel) and i was busy getting ready so declined.
We rode a wave of goodwill from everyone we knew - it was quite humbling. But as friends from training have adopted i have also felt that huge joy because i know what they've been through. So let them spoil you.!

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sarahlux · 26/05/2016 20:18

My friends threw me an amazing baby shower. I present wise I got a few clothes and toys lots of nappies but mainly they got us vouchers for mothercare.

We played a few games like guess the baby food and like a mr and Mrs game where they had asked my partner questions and I had to get the correct ones.

They put so much effort into it I was over whelmed. Would love to show some pictures but it would Probaly out me lol.

The best present they did was a book they had all made detailing our journey. All my friends and family wrote letters for it. After a few glasses of wine I was blubbering reading it.

Let them spoil you and enjoy it :)

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Themoleandcrew · 28/05/2016 19:17

I had a 'toddler shower'. We played a few games about kids to and stuff and I got hammered. Can't do that at a regular baby shower!! We received loads of clothes and books mainly which was great. Except it turned out that my kids are so small they couldn't wear any of them for over a year.

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Themoleandcrew · 28/05/2016 19:17

That was kids TV and stuff btw.

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Yolande7 · 11/06/2016 21:07

A friend threw me a baby shower (my children were 5 and 6 years old placement) briefly before placement. It was absolutely lovely! The presents, food and party were lovely, but for my children the most important thing is that there was a baby shower at all. It has and still does make them feel wanted, welcomed and celebrated and I am very grateful for that.

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Clockworklemon · 12/06/2016 15:56

I had a very low key last minute baby shower type lunch, invited my closest friends and it was lovely. I needed to mark the event for me, to get my head around the fact that I was going to become a mother again and to have some sense of "normality" during a very stressful and anxious lead up to introductions.

It was lovely to have a break from the adoption process madness and just have a special moment of celebration with my girlfriends as I had done when pregnant with my BC.

Absolutely agree with Yolande, so important to celebrate and start making memories. It was also a special thing for my friends to be part of, they had been great support during our journey. Lots of happy tears! Enjoy..

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