Just come into emergency accommodation and I feel so low

[cheekycee]

I’ve come into emergency accommodation with my children (one child is still on holiday with her dad but my son is with me) I feel so low and like I let them down. How am I almost 30 and I am in this situation😭. I feel so low. Everyone here see ex cons and all sorts. I’m sorry I’m judging but it is true I have seen them. I know it’s cause it’s change but honestly I feel heart broken. I’m told I could be here for 7-9 months. In a hotel room. With two kids. I’m out of the area that is normal for me so it all feels strange I’m so low.

Is the dad your child is with the reason you're in emergency accommodation?
Could she not remain with him till you're settled?

Deep breath. It will get better, keep yourself to yourself and focus on the future. You can do this because you are a strong woman and a good mum.

This can happen to anyone, so don't beat yourself up. Just remember, this is just temporary. You'll get through it.

Could your kid stay with their dad until you’ve are in different accommodation? A hotel room for you a 2 kids doesn’t sound great. Hopefully you’ll be out soon.

I'm so sorry you are going through this. It's hard but it won't be forever, you will get through this. One day you will look back on this and realise how strong you were. I hope you get a permanent place to live soon.

Short term pain for long term gain. It is tough but you will get through it. Best of luck for a rapid solution.

I don’t know what your situation is, but if you don’t have a job can you make plans to get one asap and then make plans to rent a flat?

For those commenting if my daughter can stay with her dad that’s not an option she gets jealous of me being with my son and loves being with me - I wouldn’t leave her behind. If she actively asked to do that I would but unless she asked it’s a no x

I have a full time job

Hopefully it won’t be for long.

This isnt your fault. 30 years ago in the same situation youd have got a council house. The tories sold them off and now people in your situation are stuck, as you are. Im sorry. But dont blame yourself, its a sign of the times. Try to keep strong, it wont be forever.

The same has happened to me, but trying to make it work.
it’s just food that is costing so much as no fridge.
We’re out as much as possible, kids have swimming memberships so swim for free outside of lessons, we go to free events locally. Last week was a kid’s cooking class, tomorrow is yoga & an art class.

it’s not forever, that’s what I keep saying & I make sure to get the beds changed twice a week & room hoovered at the same time.

we still play board games & read, it is depressing & I have cried several times but I keep thinking of the bigger goal, a house I can afford that we won’t get evicted from.

good luck OP.

Ahh I’m so sorry to hear. I really admire your strength. I also wish you a fast resolution at getting your forever home very soon xx

Hay girly your doing it for your children never forget what’s your doing it for! It’s not forever and Rome wasn’t built in a day. I’ve been there and there is light at the end of the tunnel xx

Thanks girl I appreciate your words - it’s so hard I feel guilty bringing them through all of this but it’s what is necessary and there no way I’d separate from them not in a million years xx

It's only temporary, you will be high up on the list for a property. So everything crossed for you it wont take to long. I really wouldn't worry to much about the kids you havent let them down you are doing what you need to do they will see it as an adventure

Im so sorry you are in this situation. When I was little we lived in a hostel for a short time as my Dad left and stopped paying the mortgage and it took a few weeks for my Mum to find a house. But looking back she made the best of it - she said it’s not what we’d choose, it’s not very nice but it’s not for ever, she set about being as cheerful and friendly to the other Mums as she could. I only knew years later that she was in utter turmoil and felt she’d failed, she thought my Dad would take us away as he had a house with the OW. I think it made me a more resilient adult.

It must be very hard but it is temporary. Try to keep hold of that word. If you work you will be put of there every day and kids at school. So it's not as bad as if you just had to be there 24/7. As PP said look for free or cheap events locally. Where are you in country? Maybe we could help find you things you could go to to limit time in room.

That may be, but you say where you are staying has ex convicts and is just one hotel room, that’s no place for children if there any other alternative for them. What about your son, could he stay with his dad or other family members too?

Thank you OP, you will get there.
Keep contacting your housing officer, contact your local housing association, that’s what I’m doing.

Do you drive? & honestly even if it’s chucking it down, get out to local library or even a cafe.

Ive picked up leaflets of local walks as well to complete with the kids.

I do washing at friends on sunny days & do gardening or house chores for them on my
days off.

We have picnic style lunches on the weekend of crackers, sausage rolls, cheese straws, crisps & fruit. Supermarket clearance shelves are great.

It does seem overwhelming at the moment but we’re already a month in & it doesn’t seem like that.

Please pm me. I don’t want to reply on here as it’s too outing. But please do message me

Please don’t beat yourself up, when I was 16, me and my parents and 6 siblings ended up in temp accommodation, it was a hostel kind of, one room for all of us, there were tough people in there clearly on drugs etc. my parents made sure we was out all day every day, weather it was the park or something, didn’t need to spend money, we weren’t in there long thankfully but none of us ever thought any less of our parents we knew the situation

Try to not blame yourself. Me and my 2 kids ended up in emergency accommodation due to fleeing DV. We got a temporary flat a week later, 8 months in the flat and got our social housing home. Been here just over a year. It's a difficult process, I used parks frequently to get the kids out the flat. Sending love xxx

My niece was in temp housing (hotel room) with her daughter for 7 months due to being homeless (kicked out of private rent and unable to find anywhere- even another private rent in the area), it was hard especially with her also working full time but she now has a lovely new build home and is settled. Look, it may seem the worst thing in the world right now but please don’t beat yourself up over it, everything will be ok.

ps. Get an airfryer, was an absolute life saver 😄

How come you ended up in emergency accommodation? Were you not paying rent? If you are working, try and private rent and work more hours to improve your situation.