Discussion thread regarding porn <trigger warning - contains distressing content & links>

[VaguelyAware]

Following a recent thread regarding porn & its detrimental effect on sexual attitudes, particularly amongst teens, one poster suggested we should have a further thread to continue the discussion.

I don't want to link to the thread until I've got permission from the OP of the previous thread, just in case, for any reason, she would rather the other thread fell from view.

I should add, I'm not an authority on this subject; I was horrified at many of the links in the previous thread. I was still under the impression that a lot of porn was significantly "softer" & lot closer to what it was 15-20 years ago. An attitude I suspect many other posters shared.

I am adding a trigger warning from the start. Please, anyone reading this thread, be aware that any links may potentially be distressing. However, I would ask that if anyone does post a link with potentially distressing content, they clearly state this.

Hello @VaguelyAware. I think this is a really valid discussion nowadays. In fact a friend of mine who is a theatre director is currently fundraising for a touring production devised and performed by young people about the effects of pornography on relationships, as well as a nationwide education project on the subject. It's a great project. If you don't mind I'm going to put the link here - please share and help to promote this conversation in a wider arena.
www.kickstarter.com/projects/1483928292/why-is-the-sky-blue-or-how-to-make-slime?ref=email

I will start by posting a link for the kickstarter to fund new piece of theatre exploring love, connection and the impact of pornography on children and young people:

www.kickstarter.com/projects/1483928292/why-is-the-sky-blue-or-how-to-make-slime/description

They have £6,030 of the £7,000 needed, & must raise the rest by 2pm today or it won't go ahead. Some lovely person (or couple of people) has donated £1k in the last couple of hours!

Haha fabulous X-post!

Oops! Cross Post! Glad to see we are on the same page though

I was still under the impression that a lot of porn was significantly "softer" & lot closer to what it was 15-20 years ago

I'd imagine a lot of people have this impression. The reality is extremely shocking.

I was one of those who doesn't use pornography but imagined it to be a slightly more robust version of Razzle or Fiesta from the 70's 80's.
Not my thing but in General what blokes do to get off.
I visited the popular porn site expecting to be surprised at the variety.

I was wrong.
Very wrong.

Nothing I saw was even remotely like sex. It was abuse.
I watched the start of three porn clips.
In each one restraint or overpowering was prominent.
I don't know how or why porn has mutated but it's nothing to do with sex now.
I'm not going to link, the implied incest in the popular titles leaves me cold, God knows how you get your brain around it if you have a blended family and step anything's.

If you haven't looked, you must. As horrible as it is you need to see what is being passed off as normal.

It is a bit weird that, on the site I looked on, most if not all of the 'top vids watched in the UK' are incest based.

Since this is a resource thread, here's a link to the BMJ study on attitudes to anal sex among young people (with the abstract below):

bmjopen.bmj.com/content/4/8/e004996.short?g=w_open_current_tab

Objective To explore expectations, experiences and circumstances of anal sex among young people.

Design Qualitative, longitudinal study using individual and group interviews.

Participants 130 men and women aged 16–18 from diverse social backgrounds.

Setting 3 contrasting sites in England (London, a northern industrial city, rural southwest).

Results Anal heterosex often appeared to be painful, risky and coercive, particularly for women. Interviewees frequently cited pornography as the ‘explanation’ for anal sex, yet their accounts revealed a complex context with availability of pornography being only one element. Other key elements included competition between men; the claim that ‘people must like it if they do it’ (made alongside the seemingly contradictory expectation that it will be painful for women); and, crucially, normalisation of coercion and ‘accidental’ penetration. It seemed that men were expected to persuade or coerce reluctant partners.

Conclusions Young people's narratives normalised coercive, painful and unsafe anal heterosex. This study suggests an urgent need for harm reduction efforts targeting anal sex to help encourage discussion about mutuality and consent, reduce risky and painful techniques and challenge views that normalise coercion.

Thanks for reminding me to donate

Another link below - petition against the Ann Summers / Pornhub collaboration.

www.change.org/p/ann-summers-ann-summers-dump-pornhub

The titles of the videos on Pornhub alone speak for themselves:

"Unwanted Painful Anal" (3.9 million views)

"Noose around her Neck, Real Hanging" (118,000 views)

"No Daddy Stop. I’m not Mummy" (2.5 million views)

"Human Toilet Girl gets a Stomach full of Fresh Urine" (71,000 views)

“Anal Tears” (1.5 million views)

“Extreme Brutal Gagging” (472,000 views)

“How to Sexually Harass Your Secretary Properly” (10.6 million views)

When Ann Summers suggests “Ways to Spice up the Night”, "Bring the Glam" or “Romance is What You Make it” .. is this what they mean?

www.preventionplatform.co.uk/?p=2222
Pleasure vs profit is a good film featuring young people which is suitable for young people to watch.

Pornland by Gail dines is a good book to read.

I'm going to start doing this.

Following - thanks for the thread @VaguelyAware

Does anyone know, on a kickstarter "all or nothing", what happens if they don't raise all the funds? Does it get automatically refunded to the donors?

They still need £439 with £70 minutes left. Just curious really.

I was just wondering the exact same thing @VaguelyAware! I really hope it doesn't just nullify everything :(

Is there any way we can promote the fundraiser any more? (Aside from keeping on bumping this thread!) I've tweeted it again.

I keep sharing it on Facebook! Have you done that too?

I missed the other thread but I agree with the sentiment on here that many people are not aware of the hideous type of porn that dominates now

Going on PornHub is certainly an education in the malevolance of men. It is all the nasty horrific fantasies of men there in front of you presented as legitimate.

I recommend any women to spend an hour on there and listen to their gut about porn

Kickstarter FAQs says no one is charged unless the goal is reached.

YES! Just seen that they've made it with 6 minutes to go!

I know! I was just checking out my online banking to see if I could afford to top up the fund (clue - they still needed nearly as much as my monthly rent) & it updated to £7k! Yay!

Haha I think we are actually the same person - I was doing exactly the same thing!

Ah brilliant!!

Some links on the Ann Summers petition about how easily distribution of porn increases the rape rate

Good thread idea!

I'll post my only link from the previous thread, however on further investigation of the website, it looks like a good resource (actually for teens to look at?) seems to be an app but is in NZ/ Australia.

fightthenewdrug.org/activist-richie-hardcore-talks-porns-effects-new-zealand-australia/

Main site:

fightthenewdrug.org

Mission statement:

"Fight the New Drug is a non-religious, non-legislative, nonprofit organization that exists to provide individuals the opportunity to make an informed decision regarding pornography. We do this by raising awareness on its harmful effects using only science, facts, and personal accounts."