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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

13 DD ambulanced to hospital and kept in overnight for drinking vodka on new years eve

44 replies

meercatmum · 01/01/2012 22:55

DD was left at girl friends house to watch DVDs and have sleepover. We were contacted at midnight via Facebook that friends parents had gone out and they had raided drinks cabinet drinking vodka baileys wine. My Dd was violently ill and unconscious so her friend was trying to get advise on FB and we were told by friends children who alerted us. By this time friends parents come home from new years eve party and called ambulance. We took taxi to her at midnight and she was kept in overnight. Thank god she was discharged at 11am with no permanent damage. DD has anorexia and mild aspergers where she feels that she needs to fit in and so the drink affected her more than her friend. Today she is very hungover and sorry for herself saying she will not drink again .... She has not drunk before. Comments

OP posts:
OddBoots · 01/01/2012 22:58

I'm not sure what kind of comments you want but I am glad she has been discharged and is okay.

LeBOF · 01/01/2012 22:58

I'm not sure what you are looking for here. How are you feeling?

workshy · 01/01/2012 22:58

it's a learning curve and I'll bet she is feeling bad enough that punishment not required

my older sis did the same thing at 15, my parents were upset, angry, embarassed, disappointed

but she never got that drunk ever again!

SootySweepandSue · 01/01/2012 22:58

I did the same at 14 and turned out fine. I'm sure the whole experience will make her rethink drinking at least in the short term.

birdsofshoreandsea · 01/01/2012 22:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

seeker · 01/01/2012 22:59

You poor thing. And poor her. I would give her loads of cuddles and reassurance-she knows she's made a mistake and she will have learnt a hard lesson. Be gentle with her and with yourself.

Spidermama · 01/01/2012 22:59

Wow what a stressful start to 2012 for you. You must have been very worried. She was very silly but we all are sometimes and hopefully this is a major learning opportunity for her. She now knows how alcohol can poison you really badly. She also knows how badly wrong it can go when you do things just because your mate is doing them.

BluddyMoFo · 01/01/2012 23:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

michglas · 01/01/2012 23:00

Sorry to say but they quickly forget the lessons learnt, and they do repeat the same mistakes. Glad she's okay though

AnyFuckerForAMincePie · 01/01/2012 23:00

I am glad she is ok

I don't what else to say

Do you want us to slag off the friends parents ?

Do you want a bit of handholding, aren't teenagers a fucking nightmare sympathy? 'Cos I can give you that in spades.

Spidermama · 01/01/2012 23:01

I agree with workshy no punishment required. She's felt the consequences of what she has done sufficiently.

You could play a blinder here. Be very sympathetc (she's had a trauma) then gradually over the next few days/weeks gently re-visit the subject asking her the odd question about what happened and how she got herself into that situation. Hopefully she'll come to her own conclusions and learn a valuable lesson.

Happy new year.

Spidermama · 01/01/2012 23:03

I did the vodka thing at 14 by the way. I remember at first it tasted bad but later on I was pleased with myself for being able to swig it like water. Next thing I knew the pavement was moving around my face! Shock

I have never touched vodka again and I have very rarely been properly drunk.

canyou · 01/01/2012 23:04

You poor thing what a scare, hopefully this is a lesson learnt early. DP was working last night and would tell you that you are not the only parent who had such a fright last night [he had 3 under 18's drunk call outs]
We are in IRL and our local Gardai sent all under16's with drink taken to hosp as it is a huge financial out going and helps parents take it seriously

Purpleroses · 01/01/2012 23:06

I'd be understanding, and take the opportunity to talk to her to make sure she knows if she's ever with friends again and she or someone else is that ill, she should contact you/other adults/999 straight away (not try and get help via facebook). Much better to have her feel she can come to you without fear of being in trouble than to try to punish her for what was certainly a pretty horrible experience and probably quite accidental (vodka is strong!)

RosemaryandThyme · 01/01/2012 23:11

Think the Anorexia is more worrying than the drink to be honest.

A1980 · 01/01/2012 23:15

I'm not sure what to say other than I'm glad she's ok. Perhaps the paretns need to keep a lock on the liquor cabinet.

Original poster
meercatmum · 01/01/2012 23:16

Thanks for all the comments they are helpful. I certainly am not looking to cause scene with other parents. I am relieved how you reinforce my hope it is a one off. As she has many other issues with food and body image I guess I am just scared that the escape into alcohol will be the next rocky path we have to follow. She has weekly cahms support and this will be raised at our next appointment altho I feel that she is handling the whole situation today pretty well. I haven't given much sympathy I probably need to... It is so very very difficult with her and she makes life so difficult for herself

OP posts:
WingDad · 01/01/2012 23:18

Every single time since the age of 12 when I first tried it, when I straight shot vodka, I violently throw it back up again within 5 seconds. Never a pretty site....

It'll have been an experience for her, and, in a roundabout fashion, it may do her good in the future when she'll be in a similar situation, she'll remember this time and may be more apprehensive.

Original poster
meercatmum · 01/01/2012 23:21

Rosemaryandthyme - her eating issues are a major concern and are the main focus of weekly cahms sessions but feel this is another new thread and is something we are trying to deal with. V v v hard tho

OP posts:
RosemaryandThyme · 01/01/2012 23:26

Best of luck with the sessions, maybe there is an under-lying thing that the sessions could help resolve for her.

Bossybritches22 · 01/01/2012 23:28

I think I'd be having a word with the host parents TBH as well, why did they leave 13 yr olds unattended with easy access to hard drink? Was this made aware to you OP? They obviously felt they could trust their DD who abused that trust.

A united front as regards words of advice on alcohol, emergency contacts etc might be good for the whole gang, bet it scared them shitless.

Thank god your DD is OK, hopefully you can chalk this one up to experience but frightening for you all.

Spidermama · 01/01/2012 23:29

I was anorexic at this age too. It's pretty hard. It must be really hard for you too. I hope the sessions help. They didn't help me I have to say. I just nodded throughout to get them off my back so I could go home and restart my regime of strict control. Horrible time.

I think it's good that you are involved. My mum completely ignored me and never accepted that I was annorexic. In the end my big sister made her take me to see someone about it. Please listen to her. I know she's driving you mad but she really needs to be heard even though she appears to reject you. She still needs you now perhaps more than ever.

I'm fine now. I worked it all out myself by the age of around 18 but I do remember it as a very tough time. Good luck to you both. x

Bossybritches22 · 01/01/2012 23:30

Sorry x-posted OP with your update-slow typing.

Spidermama · 01/01/2012 23:31

I wouldn't be looking to have a go at the parents. I leave booze in the house and I'm sure we all do because we trust our 13 year olds won't drink it.
If I were the parents though, I'd want to apologise and explain but then you can't force other people to behave well.

MollieO · 01/01/2012 23:33

Did you know she'd be having a sleepover at her friend's house when her friend's parents would be out late? If you didn't but your dd did then I'd be having words. If you dd didn't know her friend's parents would be out then I would be having words with them. Personally I'd find it odd to have children's friend over and not be in to supervise. From other threads on here I know I'm in the minority but I wouldn't leave a couple of 13 yr olds unsupervised for an evening/late night.