No, not literally, we won't be doing our own liposuction with straws, or posting messages like, "Keen sewers: I was trying to give myself a lower-body lift but can't reach to sew up the back", or anything.

But does anyone else feel hideous? I do and I'm sure it's at the root of almost all my problems (low self-esteem being the main one).

I need to diet, get hair cut, sort out flattering clothes and ditch fugly stuff, stop biting my nails!, get pedicure, keep up to date on fake-tanning... all that.

Does anyone want to join in? If we were very brave we could post "Before" photos in our profiles then invent a month-long makeover plan, then do "After" pictures, but that might be a bit scary.

We need to ge up earlier and prioritise doing our make-up! And do a beauty treatment three times a week (body scrub, face pack, hair conditioning treatment, etc) just to nourish our Inner Temptresses.

I know it's non-PC to long to look gorgeous, but I'm fed up looking fat and frumpy and desperately need to reinvent myself! am i alone in feeling like this?

I know the awful irony of having a vain log-in name and posting this message, btw.