Rubbish sleeper personalities?

[Poppet45]

So DS sometimes slept through when he was teeny tiny but has never slept through again since he was 3 months. He's now 15 months, and wakes one or two times a night, once my hubby puts him down in the early part of the night but if there's a second later waking, normally around 2-4am I feed him. Yes, yes admire my sparkly beautiful rod for my own back... on similar lines he still gets hysterical if you put him in his cot wide awake, so I tend to feed him to sleep or else cuddle and sing to him til he's very snoozy and then tuck him in. My partner can get him off with a shush pat, but he'll no longer fall asleep for me doing that.
Anyway we're almost resigned to this, although possibly considering nightweaning over xmas, but was talking to friends with more experience and also my HV and they said it was their more gifted/inquistive kids who were the worst sleepers. They were probably just being nice and offering me some consolation for no decent sleep in over a year, but do you think it tends to be the brighter kids who have the most difficulties sleeping?

Yes

Though this is based upon the fact that, as my mum still likes to remind me, I didn't sleep through til I was 4

We have a 21month old DS who still wakes most nights. You have our sympathies as it is so exhausting.

I'm afraid that your suspicion that people are just trying to be nice is right.

But I'm sure your DS will be a genius .

A handsome one .

Well, I think it has to do with how sensitive a soul DC is. DS is an emotional sponge .

I don't think it does follow all the time that a non-sleeper ends up being gifted. However, I do think that a lot of more gifted children need less sleep than their less gifted peers (or at least, my HV said she's seen this to be the case). Does that make sense?

TBH, I'd be happy with DS being totally average and sleeping occasionally, but it does help us get through the relentlessness of no sleep for 14 months by telling ourselves he is obviously a genius . He isn't - he's about as normal a toddler as you'll find - but it keeps us from maiming him at 3 am

(oh, and I have always been a really bad sleeper, but am no genius - and my brother who can sleep for britain really isn't the sharpet knife in the drawer. So it's no predictor of future personality)

WRT the feeding to sleep/shush pat - We recently lost our temper with DS (always fed to sleep until 12 months when he just stopped sleeping at the end of the feed) and ended up leaving him to scream (with us in the room) - it took him 4 hours to go to sleep the 1st night... However, he's much more resigned to staying lying down in his cot since then, and although ~4 nights out of 7 he still farts around and yells if we don't pick him up, we're having more and more nights where he goes to sleep without much input from us. Now just to keep him sleeping...

Oh god yes DS is an emotional sponge. Right now he's into hugging so hard he trembles! And I was sure that by posting in the Sleep section we could get an unbiased cross section of sleep deprived parents who all agree that our DCs are indeed insomniac geniuses with movie star good lucks.
:)

I'm still a crap sleeper. Of course, I'm also a genius

Actually, I think it has more to do with my having a naturally anxious personality.

When I asked my Mum about my earlier sleep patterns, she said, "Oh yes, IC, you were always a worrier..."

I got good A Levels, though.

My DD (now 10mo) isn't a great sleeper. She is, however, definitely a genius

Yes I'd buy that DS's a worrier too. I was just rather taken with the IQ thing because it stokes my maternal ego, and also because every dimwitted sodding checkout girl (sorry to the non-dimwitted ones) that I've ever been offered unwanted advice from appears to have had children that slept through from some point mid labour.... My favourite piece of unwanted advice from some retail Mensa candidate was on learning that DS was still breast fed at night, informed me that was 'all about me not him'. Her kids were breast fed and she never did any night feedings. I asked her what she did when hers woke in the night and she looked non plussed and said: 'uh well they never woke up'. She was under the impression I woke DS up at rubbish o'clock at night just to shove my boob in his gob just for shits and giggles

dd is now 13 and didn't sleep through til she started school at 4 yrs and about 3 days old. she is pretty much near the top of everything at school - has just taken her first gcse and is v v active even now - gymanstics etc so there may be some link.

not so sure about the gifted and talented or whatever.

my dd is the above schoolwise, but is also a terrible sleeper, very ott about some things, emotional, wise and super 'awake' generally. she is 8 now. was awake most of her baby years, never fell asleep in the car as a baby/toddler.

Terrible eater, and a general pain in the arse in many ways because she is so intense. BUT very polite, never gets stroppy or childish. Never had a tantrum. She's just pretty clued up and wise. Like a little old lady!

People keep saying that about our super-alert, nosy, wired, sleep-fighting DS. I bloody hope they are right. I was a crap sleeper as a baby - straight As at GCSE and A-level and an Oxford first. No bloody common sense whatsoever mind you

DD (2) slept through at 4 months - hope she'll be able to get me a discount at Tescos!

My friend's DD has always been a rubbish sleeper & she is so much more advanced than DD it worries me sometimes, but I figure she's been awake for so much longer in those (apparently crucial) first 2 years she's had much more time to squeeze more info into her little brain than DD has!

PiratecatClaus I hear you on the never sleeping in the car thing. Beyond five months he gave up sleeping in the buggy. That left him only napping in his cot ever, which wasn't restrictive at all. :(
Bessie26 if it makes you feel any better I told my MIL about the HV's theory and she assured me DS wasn't going to be a genius because it was the other way round, the sleepers have all that time unconscious which is when they get smart. In which case my son is going to be a greeter at Asda.

So anyone the parent of a teeny tiny insomniac who, in the nicest possible way, reckons their kid is rather more Morrisons than Mensa? :o

My DS is 4 (on Monday) as has rarely slept through (when I say rarely, I realy do mean approximately 5 times) He is of normal intellect, but I would class him as very sensitive and as Dr Sears would put it a 'high needs child'. He is, in old fashioned terminology a 'mummys boy'. He has come on in lepas and bounds, but is still very sensitive and we still co-sleep. He is fairly young for his age and is fixated on his hobby.

As an aside, my DS2 is 16 months and I would not be able to comment on his personality yet as I feel he is still a baby.

DD is very clever but my two boys although fairly bright are definitely more Morrisons than Mensa.

Sensitive - tick. High needs - TICK. Mummy's boy - tick. :o

I was contemplating earlier today whether it was time I started a thread in 'sleep'... DD is 4.10, and has brief patches where she sleeps through, but has been waking at night every night since early October.

DH and I are almost on our knees... but she is like other children on this thread- was a 'high needs' baby, and very sensitive, though extremely perceptive, super-observant, polite, mature, and quite machiavellian with lots of 'schemes' going to achieve her desires... she is bright too, very bright, though so far I'd not say gifted. She definitely dwells on things, and worries about them.

I have been mulling over seeking professional help with the sleep tbh.

CaptainNancy that sounds exactly like my DD!

Scary!!

Sleeping through now at almost 3, took about 2.7yrs to get here. Pretty sure the sleeping through is just a phase tbh!

If that's the case then DS1 (nearly 4 and rarely slept the night) is a shoe-in for Mensa and DS2 is thick as pig sh**. ( 5M and sleeps from 6pm till we wake him up)

You can have it both ways, I reckon.

Either super-alert and cramming loads into those wide-awake brains...

...or spending many crucial hours asleep while processing all the info they've absorbed while conscious....

My DH was apparently an easy baby and a good sleeper and he's scarily bright.

But I would say that, wouldn't I?!

[loyal nodding wife emoticon]

Well much as I'd like DS to be a potential Nasa scientist.... I have to say he seems pretty normal development wise, maybe a bit advanced speech wise but in no rush for gross motor skills. He's almost 16 months and is only just attempting to walk holding on to hands :o
I do think he fits the personality in other ways though, definitely intense, high needs, very sensitive, indeed king of the melodramatic hissy fit, but also very gregarious, affectionate and social.... which given I'm a mardy cow was rather a pleasant surprise. Here's hoping we all get some nice uninterrupted sleep sometime soon.

both dds have been crap sleepers
dd2 is still tiny, so i have no idea of her personality.
but dd1 is definitely intense. she's bright, but no genius, but very talkative, observant and generally full-on. she can also be very anxious.

DD never slept much. She didn't nap for longer than half an hour, gave up napping entirely at 12 months. Woke all the time. Has never needed much sleep at all. She will still be up and happy at 11pm and fully awake, alert and ready to go the next morning. She never sleeps through.

My hv told me when she was 6 weeks old that it was often noted that children who didn't need much sleep were often 'classically intelligent' ie quick to learn, pick up things easily, curious, early talkers, readers and writers. She also said that dd's hatred of lying down and wanting to run before she could crawl indicated this too. I laughed/cried/whimpered a bit. I just wanted her to sleep.

She's 3 now. She can read and write. She's pretty switched on. Inquisitve, curious, interested.

She's also v sensitive which the hv predicted.

My DD, 22 mo, is not especially advanced.

She is anxious, but I always thought that was because she gets so little sleep. We feel anxious, as we are always overtired because of her.

Despite this, she is a lovely, gentle, sensitive little thing, though very full on and demanding, with not much confidence when it comes to gross motor skills.

What does "emotional sponge" mean?

I think it's definitely more an indication of personality (clingy, emotional, deeply loving) than intelligence. But I would say that because I slept through the night from 6 weeks.