I am single, 40s, no kids, decided after my last relationship that I preferred being single and have been happily so for the past 10 years.
But there's a man who I work with - also in his 40s, married for a long time - who I have always liked, and thought that if he were single and I was interested in relationships, he'd be just my type. I never got the impression that he was into me at all though.
Then last autumn he just said out of the blue that he had moved out of his house and had to make a decision whether to separate from his wife. This triggered a massive crush - I guess because he was suddenly potentially available. I read up here on the Relationships board about similar situations and worked out that he almost certainly had an OW. So I decided to just try to get rid of the crush. Avoided him as much as I could, tried not to think about him, didn't ask him or anyone else any questions about his personal life. I just wanted him out of my head. He may have noticed the crush as I was very awkward around him for a while. I also lost a lot of weight, but credited this to a diet
We have a mutual friend who he confides in, who later dropped hints to me about a 'girlfriend', so it looks like there is in fact an OW.
He then moved to a branch in another town - the story was that it was so he could move in with his brother who lives there, although I imagine it was to be with the OW. He still has to come in to our branch sometimes though.
So six months have passed and my crush had petered out, but lately when he's in our office he's been very very friendly with me. I thought I was possibly imagining the flirting until another coworker made a sarcastic comment to him (like 'you obviously want a shag'). So now he's back in my head again.
So what's the most likely situation now?
He has no interest in doing anything, but wants to get me crushing on him again for the ego boost?
He wants a fling when he's working in our town, whilst still in a relationship with the OW? He probably thinks I don't know about her.
He's splitting from the OW and looking for a new GF? (If only...)
I could try getting information from the mutual friend, but I'm worried that this would be showing my hand.
I think I should just try to forget about him again and possibly find someone outside work to have a fling with, to get it out of my system.
Convince me
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Relationships
My crush now appears to like me - what's he up to?
witteringon · 03/03/2013 14:20
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