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Omg!!!! I've just found out

(164 Posts)
Stopthepidgeon Sat 17-Nov-12 16:15:18

Okay - so following on from my should I should I not track my cheating husband thread .....

He has taken our dc out to visit his parents - and left his computer open

I am dumbstruck to find out he has secret savings in excess of £1 million!!

This is not a stealth boast - I am in total shock

TuftyFinch Mon 19-Nov-12 13:20:56

Tell him DC's presents add up to £1 million.

lisad123 Mon 19-Nov-12 13:26:47

Would be so tempted to try and move money to my own account if that was ever possible.mi know our bank saves other accounts we have paid in from and out of, so maybe your other account is saved too ;)
Personally I would go spare, can't believe he is moaning about Xmas pressies when there is one million in the bank!!

ShipwreckedAndComatose Mon 19-Nov-12 13:27:16

What are you planning to do?

His behaviour is so odd!!

SirSugar Mon 19-Nov-12 13:28:38

This is fascinating.

After H died, a mate of his called up from abroad and said I've got $20,000 of his, how would you like me to get it to you! Thank goodness for his honesty as I knew nothing of this money.

Yours is a bit like a lottery win grin

DragonMamma Mon 19-Nov-12 13:46:23

Bleed. Him. Dry.

MadAboutHotChoc Mon 19-Nov-12 13:51:45

*Change the password, take it all, LTB.

Isn't that the default MN response?*

Sorry to disappoint you Cronullansw grin

Furoshika Mon 19-Nov-12 14:01:15

What form is the money in?
(stocks, ISAs etc)

unlucky67 Mon 19-Nov-12 14:16:32

What about if he deliberately left it so you could see it...thinking that if you knew he had so much money you wouldn't leave him ....(assuming it is real money and it isn't some devious trick) - or that you might leave him now - hoping to get a share of the money - so he gets some kind of guilt free/or even possibly cheaper escape?
And the thing about the christmas pressies was a test - whether he deliberately left it for to see or it was an accident ...he suspects you may have seen it and he was trying to work it out...

Either way it doesn't sound like you are in a good relationship and you need to think about what you need to do to make you happy...

unlucky67 Mon 19-Nov-12 14:30:19

BTW I would be surprised if you could move it out of his account...DP and I are with the same bank...we have a standing order that transfers money from my partner's account to mine every month to pay for bills etc...we have children's account in both our names... we bought a house and are renovating - large sums of money have passed between our current account's over the last 6 months...
Rest of money for renovation (for now) is in my partner's isa but to keep an eye on costs all the payments are coming out of my account -when he lost his card recently I couldn't transfer £2k for the plumber from his to my account because we couldn't use the card reader to authorise it!

clam Mon 19-Nov-12 14:48:47

I have to say that it does strike me as very odd that someone as practised a deceiver as your h would be so careless as to leave his computer open with such potentially incriminating evidence on it.
Is there any reason explaining how that came about?

MrsBucketxx Mon 19-Nov-12 14:52:52

wow there is no hiding our accounts as ee are both linked on the mortgage and can see the accounts.

i know this could be dangerous but i would call his bluff create a false money problem like i have a gambling problem i need x we need to remortgage etc, and watch his reaction if he is still tight tell him i know about the money, that was bollocks i just wanted a reaction out of you.

or just say i know about the money and see what his reaction is to that.

LaCiccolina Mon 19-Nov-12 14:58:20

Do not confront.

Send to solicitor fast. Be warned there's cases going on recently that might well mean u can't get any if u leave. Some rich blokes hid money from wives, cheated, got caught. Wives snooped, found secret cash but damn fool judges said oh dear me poor pitiful men they must keep it!!!!!!! May set precedents. Clarify this then spend like billiho if necessary before u walk out!

Longdistance Mon 19-Nov-12 14:59:42

The only problem that telling him you know, is he'll change the account and move the money elsewhere, and could claim he gambled it away. Hence, keeping the knowledge to herself.

Corygal Mon 19-Nov-12 14:59:50

What are your ideas on where he got it all from?

ClippedPhoenix Mon 19-Nov-12 15:08:12

Well he was lax enough to get caught in an affair so why not this?

I'd keep my mouth shut and get as much info as I possibly could.

Then it would be the divorce courts for me..

"I'll have half thank you dear"

BluelightsAndSirens Mon 19-Nov-12 15:11:10

Wow just read the thread, stay strong and quiet

Plomino Mon 19-Nov-12 15:16:00

Excellent response Pidgeon .

The really suspicious part of me says however that this normally careful man might just have done it on purpose , to make you think this is all (all! ) there is . Don't be too surprised if subsequent events reveal more.

MrsBucketxx Mon 19-Nov-12 15:39:47

could it he some sort of lottery win?

FrankincenseWippery Mon 19-Nov-12 15:48:02

Gosh and wow and all that.

Stopthepidgeon Mon 19-Nov-12 17:52:14

Thanks all for your support - I'm just biding my time for now. No point in me throwing a hissy fit - lets see what more secret info the new year brings .....

The way I feel about it at the moment is its not so much the amount of money per sey, just about yet another layer of deceit being uncovered. For now I'm intrigued and fishing like crazy at safe moments

I always said I wanted to take up fishing - ironic, huh?wink

solittletimeandsomuchtodo Mon 19-Nov-12 17:52:24

angry
How are you op?

Stopthepidgeon Mon 19-Nov-12 18:02:23

Hi so little. Amazingly I'm fine. Very busy with work and honelife with the dcs which is keeping me sane for now. Thanks.

Londonista1975 Mon 19-Nov-12 20:13:07

I'm interested to know what hs reaction was when he came back, knowing you were there?

solittletimeandsomuchtodo Tue 20-Nov-12 08:06:22

X-post grin
I know how you are feeling (not the bank balance!) but the affair. In the same boat -it's heartbreaking isn't it. (sorry I don't think I read your other post)

Bogeyface Netherlands Tue 20-Nov-12 08:15:36

Buy him a copy of Silas Marner for Christmas wink

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