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Dec 08 Mums - happy new year, happy new thread and soon some happy new babies!

999 replies

sybilfaulty · 01/01/2012 09:37

Happy new year!

Sorry for the rubbish title but wanted to get the new thread underway. Let's close the door on some of the sad events of 2011 and look forward to a better year in 2012.

OP posts:
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Kayzr · 01/01/2012 09:50

Happy New Year everyone!!!

Sybs Its very nice to have a new thread. Here's to a much better year for everyone.

LadyT DP will be away for 10 weeks, he has a couple of training courses and then 8 weeks on the ship. He has a friend who works for the same company who has just come home from working off shore in Ghana so it all sounds very exotic.

Spot They seem quite excited. DS1 really wants another brother and DS2 isn't bothered either way really.

Hope everyone is ok and not too hungover.

Indith · 01/01/2012 16:34

Happy New Year.

I can't remember a thing of what I have just read. I can't even get words out properly at the moment, brain thinks one thing mouth says something completely different and random. Dd is just hideous. I so desperately want to sleep and am really starting to worry about how I'm going to cope when the baby arrives if she carries on like this. She had been quite settled for a while at between one and 4-ish wakes which I could cope with. At the moment I don't ever feel like I actually sleep. Ds wakes most nights with growing pains or a nightmare or some other need for a cuddle (fine and normal for his age), dd is constantly demanding night and day, they are both shattered all the time from school/night waking so spend a lot of time screeching, I am anaemic again and while I am really, really looking forward to school starting back it does mean an extra run a day as dd will need picking up from nursery at lunchtime so I'll be up to around 6 miles a day walking.

Oh dear that's all "woe is me" when really I have no problems at all, we are all happy and (mostly) healthy.

How many of the 3 year olds are starting pre-school/nursery for their 15 hours for hte first time next week then? Dd can't wait, she is so excited :)

JollyBear · 01/01/2012 19:31

Happy new year all. Just marking my place. Children refusing to nod off!

Kayzr · 01/01/2012 19:38

XH just text to say that XMIL won't let the boys stay there anymore so until the council pull their fingers out and sort him out a house he can't have them overnight. Well maybe once a month!!! AngryAngry

I told DS1 about it and he said "it's because Grandma doesn't like me isn't it?" Sad

She's so bloody horrible. It's not fair on the boys or XH at all.

JamInMyWellies · 01/01/2012 22:47

Just marking my place. Happy New Year all.

DeidreBarlow · 02/01/2012 11:16

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

Just marking my place during my coffee break, I am trying to take the decorations down today, tidy up and generally get back to normal. Work tomorrow urghhh Sad

DeidreBarlow · 02/01/2012 11:19

Oh has anyone made any resolutions?? Mine is the usual to 'Get slim & fit'.

And Indith did you mention pre-school? Yes DS starts on Wednesday he will be doing 3 full days, and we are just paying for the top up. Can't quite believe we are at that stage already!

LadyThompson · 02/01/2012 16:20

Hello all. Thanks to Sybs for the new thread. Had a lovely party on NYE. Yes Spot, we took the girls but they just went to sleep upstairs so all easy and fine. We also stayed there instead of getting a cab to my flat, as it's a mahoosive house, so it was easy. We all had the karaoke out - DP and I were both hoarse the next morning...I was only a bit hungover the next day but felt sluggish and yacky and tired all the same.

Yes, my tenant, who was supposed to be moving in on Sat 7th, has vanished over Christmas. Irritating. More viewings tomorrow then DP and I are nipping over on Weds evening to get the last of my stuff ( I say 'nipping', but as much as you can nip a 120 mile round trip).

Indith, how are you? Are you feeling better today? I am so sorry about the lack of sleep and I do think it feels worst of all when one is pregnant as well. So once you have the new baby things may actually improve. As to pre-school, DD1 has been doing two mornings a week since Sept and now she is increasing to four mornings a week, 9-1. That means we will only be paying for one extra hour. DP said this morning he thinks four mornings will be too much for her. I wish he'd said that a few weeks ago when I was booking the hours. Anyway, I guess we can always drop one if necessary.

Her eating has gone from eccentric to dire again. She has lost weight and seems quite anxious so we are quite worried about her. Mind you, she has had had a string of viruses in quick succession as we all have, so I think it may partly be that.

Anyone heard from Beans?

Kayz, why is your XMil being like that? What is her problem with the boys staying? How mean!

Spot, how are feeling about your new home now? I feel quite glad to have survived 2011.

I feel quite positive about 2012. I am off to Norway a week on Friday with the cricket team, for 5 days. Sans kids! I have mixed feeling about this. I will really miss them and worry about them. But simultaneously, I'm excited.

New Year resolutions, DB? Let's see: they're a bit rough but basically

  1. Enjoy my life and above all to enjoy the present. I don't mean that in a particularly heavy way but it strikes me as v important.
  2. Travel more. Oslo in Jan is a good start. If I only had a week left to live, lack of travel would be one of my chief regrets and in the last couple of years it's gone to the wall.
  3. Yep, slim down and get fitter, though I am probably down the best part of a stone compared to last Jan and so that feels good. But I always have that one, as well as
  4. Write more.

I suppose I should add "finish the house" to the list. I am heartily hoping that won't feature in next year's Grin

Am reading The Sense of an Ending by J. Barnes. V enjoyable so far.

DeidreBarlow · 02/01/2012 16:50

I am also adding being a better mum to the DC's to my resolutions. I need to be more patient with them I think. I forget DD is only 5, and treat her like she is older...and I forget that DS is 3 and therefore has to do EVERYTHING on his own, which usually means everything takes longer to do.

So to that I will also add be more organised. As I am usually rushing about and as a result end up shouting at the DC's to hurry up or the like....

DeidreBarlow · 02/01/2012 16:51

lady Your trip sounds heavenly! I seriously need some sans DC time to appreciate them more.

I also hope DD1 is just a little run down, and will be back to her own self soon

LadyThompson · 02/01/2012 17:05

I am looking forward to it, DB. I am looking forward to going dog sledding even more than the cricket...it's something I have always wanted to do.

DD1 is such a complicated child, it seems to me. I hope she can chill out a bit as the years go by, more for her sake than mine....

Beans36 · 02/01/2012 18:43

Hello lovely ladies. Apologies for being silent. Nothing personal, just busy bee. Had 6 adults for supper on NYE and 4 of them stayed, with 3 nippers between them, so it was hectic schmectic. We went to bed at 2.30am and got up at 6.30am. I knew I was a grown up because I got up when the first child did and came downstairs and cleaned up and got breakfast ready for everyone before anyone else came down. I am a wonder of modern science. Robobeans. DH was hilarious and on spanking form. I giggled so much. It was like being about 19 again. Everyone got shedded and danced and laughed so much. We'd all forgotten about getting up early for the nippers in the morning and it really didn't matter that we were floppy for one day and it was such FUN! I loved it! 8 of us (one doesn't drink, so 7 really) got through 4.5 bottles of champagne/prosecco, 5 bottles of wine and half a bottle of sloe gin. Bleugh. Worth every ache and pain, though!

Sybs - thank you for the new thread and I like the title. I want 2012 to be a good year.

My resolutions are to get thinner and fitter, as always and have a date night every month with DH and be a less shouty mum and to make friends if we ever move into our new house.

Lady - you sound in quite good heart, apart from DD1's eating. Our DD1 stopped eating completely over Xmas and it turned out she had the flu. I knew she was ill, but not how ill. Properly unwell. Back on track now again, which is a blessed relief. But still so much less than every other child I know - even DD2!

Dad update: he has managed to shift the pneumonitis and his chemo starts again on Thursday. We all went to see him yesterday and it was lovely to see him on such good form. He went to play golf today. Apparently he fell over a lot, because his leg won't support him, but he loved it. Mum is ok, but very teary with me this morning, which hurts my heart. He has just aged so much, if you know what I mean. Everything takes so long. They told him he should have one good summer left in him. Which is pretty tough. I know it's a blessing to have him for a while longer and I am very very lucky on that front. But having it put into those terms is fairly hard and, well, final, if you know what I mean. Mum has said that she'd rather none of us went to see him once the chemo starts again on Thursday for a few weeks, as he finds it v distressing. So that was the last visit for a bit.

Kayz - you XMIL does sound quite odd - so unfair on your XH and the boys. What reasoning is she using?

I haven't caught up with the last thread and this one enough, I apologise.

Indith - are you ok? Where are you? Can I come and help at all in the day so you can have a snooze and your DD can play with mine?

DDs go to nursery tomorrow for 2 days and I don't start work again til next week. Marvebloodyllous! I have SO much to do. Proper cleaning post NYE party, ironing, shopping, thank you letters, the works.

Trace - I saw you have done a big post and I need to read it, sorry! Will do!

Anyway, I hope that's enough. PLLLLEEEEEEEASE can I find out who my Secret Santa was? I read the Hunger Games in about 5 hours and loved it. What a brilliant fun book! xxxx

Kayzr · 02/01/2012 18:52

Well XMIL is tired despite they only go every other weekend. The boys aren't disiplined and XH still shouts at them. They wake up too early never before half 7 though (she always brags at me when she knew I was getting up at 5am with DS2)

What really really pisses me off is that she would be fine if just DS2 went and not DS1.

I am fuming about it.

Not to mention being worried about the pregnancy as MW couldn't find the heartbeat 2 weeks ago. That is starting to get to me as well. Sad

I will be back soon to read the last few post properly and catch up.

Indith · 02/01/2012 19:53

Beans you lovely thing. Durham quite far to come for a spot of babysitting though Grin. Your New Year sounds fab and just what you needed to give you a little break from worrying. Your dad sounds as though he is doing very well and enjoying every moment he can. I hope you have many more lovely times with him over the next months :).

LadyT Envy at your trip. You could do with a break too after all the illness, enjoy it! Sure dd1 will perk up again as winter heads off. A break from bugs and more time outdoors as the weather improves will surely see her eating more. How does she eat at pre-school? I assume she has lunch there?

Kayz how pg are you now? They don't even try to find the heartbeat until pretty late on here, didn't even do it the appointment after my dating scan, I think it was the one after that so try not to worry, it can be a very tricky thing to find. Playing devil's advocate, I understand how frustrating it is for you about XMIL and that there are are clearly some issues with her behaviour towards the boys but I can understand it from her point of view too that she feels having them so often is too much. It cannot be easy for her to have ended up with her ds back in the house and being expected to have the boys sleeping over so regularly. I know my MIL would not want the kids staying over so much (in fact she has never had dd to stay without us and has only once looked after her on her own as she feels dd is too much hard work) and for my MIL that is without the extra issues of your XH shouting at them and any other issues. Is there no room for compromise with her with perhaps them staying overnight once a month instead of once a fortnight?

Dd sort of slept last night. Please let her do it again tonight! She is so excited about starting pre-school and chattering away ab out her friends who go there.

Party invites written for 6 of ds's classmates. Argh! How to entertain 7 4/5 year olds for 2 hours? Ds wants a castle for his cake, I'm thinking of running along that theme and getting them to make costumes. Is it being too ambitious if I get white t-shirts and pre-draw outlines on them for a dress/armour/sash and cloak so they can colour them in in fabric pens to be a lady/knight/lord? Thought that could occupy them when they get here before we hit part games then hopefully food will keep them happy for the rest of the time!

Resolutions:

Shout less (a frequent resolution of mine that never lasts long).
Be honest with myself and dh and if I have any signs of pnd this time GET HELP.
Make sure I start doing exercise (gently and gradually) as soon as I can post baby.
Eat more healthily (once the christmas chocolate all gone anyway. Can't waste food now can we Hmm).

Kayzr · 02/01/2012 19:59

Indith, I am 15w+4 and was 14 weeks when the MW tried to find the heartbeat. I'm hoping this week goes very quickly.

The XMIL thing has really pissed me off as she will have XSIL girls all the bloody time even with just 10 minutes notice. But she won't have the boys with loads of notice.

Kayzr · 02/01/2012 20:01

Oh and XH isn't living with XMIL he is sofa surfing with mates and his sisters. So it is just 4 nights a month.

Indith · 02/01/2012 20:03

14 weeks is early to find a heartbeat with a doppler. Try to relax. Like i said, they didn't even try at that point here.

And if she is happy to have other grandchildren then I'd be very Angry too. I shall cease trying to see her side of it.

sybilfaulty · 02/01/2012 20:19

Very quickly on as I've a Christmas tree to dismantle:

Beans, will text you darling.

Kayz, you can't worry about a lack of a HB til 20w as baby is so small and only has to be in wrong position for nothing to be heard. Round here they don't get the doppler out til 18w and even then say if they can't hear anything it means nothing at all. You are doing fantastically. Please try not to worry too much.

LadyT, I think 2012 will be the year all your housing comes good. You have a lovely kitchen after all.

Db - your resolutions look good. I try to do the same ones each year - shout less, eat less, drink less, worry less etc. Am always the same by Jan 4th or so though. I do feel a strange calm this year though. Was lovely today to my horrid ex friend who has been a cow and even nice to the threatening next door neighbour. I feel my halo glowing already. Saint Sybs. Has a nice ring to it, dontcha think?!!

Back later, once tree in front garden.

OP posts:
SummerLightning · 02/01/2012 20:48

HI all,
Happy New years to you all!!

Have had a lovely Xmas and New Year, MIL here over Xmas, in an extreme stroke of luck she lost her voice, haha. No seriously, am getting on much better with her these days, since DH had a big fight with her and told her to stop going on about how DS behaves badly (he really doesn't actually for his age) and she has. Which probably basically means she is lying but that's fine by me if the atmosphere is better when she is around!
At my parents for New YEar, with my bro and SIL as well. My parents out for the night on New YEar too so got to have dinner with just bro and SIL which was nice. Steak, which I cooked so nice and rare. MMMM. Then bro and SIL fell asleep before midnight on the sofa (they do have a four month old refluxy baby and bro is newly qualified doctor - hmmm, am I trying to convince myself my conversation was not boring??) beans your new year sounds ace!! I am not brave enough to get that drunk these days. Well actually I did once a month or so ago and I was sick. For the first time since i was 18! Oh the shame.

Thankyou thankyou to my secret santa ( Effie). Lovely choccies, actually my fave so all scoffed finally and lovely baileys mug!

Anyone get any good Xmas pressies? I asked for a Kindle and didn't get one so just bought myself one with the money that DH had spent on a dress I didn't like (plus was also handwash only - what was he thinking?) plus some of my own. Very exciting, anyone got any recommended but not too hard to read books? beans I have read the hunger games, super exciting and super fun, there are two more you know!

trace I am sure I am getting more forgetful. Dh is worse though. I just don't understand how he can reread books without knowing he's read them before. but he has a photographic memory for computer programming commands. Weird. But actually the latter would be useful in my line of work rather than remembering the plot of some crap book. Also DH cannot remember which clothes belong to which DC (if they are not pink or blue), or anything like that. Or where anything goes in the kitchen. It drives me mad! But i am afraid I don't have any advice on it. Any progress on your house?

Sybs I like the sound of saint sybs. May the calmness continue!

My news resolutions - hmmm, get fitter and have more fun this year. Oh and to try and actually think about my career a bit rather than drifting along. And not to spend loads of time pissing around on the internet (this doesn't count), and also to stop swearing in front of the kids (full stop would be good)

kayz your xMIL sounds a piece of work. If they're tiring her out can she not just tell XH to get on with it himself for at least some of the time? Sounds like from what the ladies above say that the HB thing is totally nothing to worry about so try and relax!

indith sorry you are lacking in sleep. I do think that being pregnant is really knackering and you may be pleasantly surprised when DC3 arrives, when are you due? I don't know - whenever I've thought, I can't possibly cope, things seem to get a bit better at the last minute. But I hope you are ok!

Right gotta go now, DH bringing us a takeaway as one last treat before new year diet starts (tomorrow, eek)

JollyBear · 02/01/2012 21:40

Hello all,

summer Was your DH offended you returned the dress?! DH bought strictly 'on list' this year so all good Smile.

kayz I'm shocked your midwife even tried with a doppler. I never saw one before 20 weeks. Annoying re your MIL but not sure what you can do.

ladyT Have a lovely trip. I'd love to go somewhere very snowy. We've always talked about going somewhere for DD1's birthday but it would have to be next year or else it wouldn't be school holidays. Will there be anywhere to play cricket that isn't frozen?!

syb I'm yet to tackle the tree. Very saintly start to the new year, well done!

beans Wow, you amaze me with your energy. Up till 2, awake at 6! We stayed at the in laws and had a lie in. Blissfull!

indith At DD's party we did: 1, crown decorating, 2. treasure hunt - chocolate coin treasure, 3. games, 4. food, 5. Goodbye! The treasure hunt went really well. I can explain what we did if you like.

trace Re memory. I used to have a very good memory. I would say hello to people in the street and realise they served me once in a shop months earlier or similar. Now I can't remember a thing. I don't recognise people I've chatted to at baby groups the week before even. I'd ask if it could be anything to do with your meds but be assured you don't sound abnormal to me!

New years resolutions: I don't usually bother but DH and I are so disorganised that I fear our girl's are going to be the sort of children that miss school trips because we don't return slips on time Blush. SO, I am going to get us organised. There will be systems, order, folders, dividers, and a sense of calm surrounding all our houshold affairs. This year I will be able to find the car insurance when we need a new MOT Grin. Not done anything about it yet but Rome wasn't built in a day Wink.

SummerLightning · 02/01/2012 21:46

jb not not offended, as he had actually bought me two dresses and I liked one so he was actually very pleased with himself. The one I didn't like was actually pretty expensive (60 quid) so I'm glad I took it back rather than pretending I liked it!

I would like your treasure hunt idea jb! We are having a small party for DS at the weekend, though think there may only be a handful of kids there so not sure we need anything fancy to do.

Beans36 · 03/01/2012 09:55

DD2 up from 1-4am and then for the day at 6.45. Little beggar. Although, her room has 2 outside walls and it was freezing in there last night. And you could hear the storms. I am exhausted. But lucky me, I have two days off now! Have written about 5 thank you letters this morning, and about another 10 to go. Inlaws one is going to be a biggie (so to speak).

Off for a smear now. Joy.

SL - buying yourself a Kindle is such a good idea. I am going to buy myself a top today or tomorrow. I just really fancy one for some reason. Nothing in mind, just a potter.

We let a friend from NCT's parents stay in our place over Xmas as they came down from Scotland and we were away, so no point in spending money on a hotel. As a thank you, they've sent us a £75 gift voucher for a lovely lovely restaurant in Balham. How kind is that? DH and I need to get a date booked in for our first date night of my New Year's Resolution!!!

xx

Artichohohohokes · 03/01/2012 11:06

How kind of your friends Beans. That tale makes me want more friends who live outside London but like mini-breaks. I'm glad you had a nicevisit with your Pa. I hope this week's chemo goes well.

Summer - I bought MiL a kindle for chrimbo and was so impressed when I set it up for her that I now really want one. I am reading a v interesting book about the lives of the Bletchley Park code breakers. If that might interest you let me know and I will look up the actual author and title.

Indith - that sounds like pretty severe sleep deprivation you are experiencing. You poor thing.

Lady - I'm glad you had a fun new year. Sorry about your loss if tenant though. January it hopefully a good time to let London property so fingers crossed for you. And fingers crossed that your DD1 relaxes about food again and that your agent finds an enthusiastic publisher soon.

Did anyone else read the Observer article on Sunday about the differences between English and French parents? It claimed that not only were French children better behaved (they have no concept of the terrible twos) but they all sleep through from two months! Stupidly it did not explain how the French make this happen. I expect it was a load of bollocks but I was intrugued.

New Years resolutions: no playing on internet/phone in front of DH or kids. Lose 8lbs and tone-up before I go to California in July where I will be reunited with many beautiful friends from High School. Expand my repetpire of yummy meals I can cook without reading a recipe.

DD2 starts nursery tomorrow. Just her free 15 hours a week but she has never done group childcare before so I am quite nervous. Luckily I still have this week on holiday so I am available to help her settle.

I am writing this in GP waiting room. I had a slightly blocked ear on 30 Dec and decided to attack it with a Q tip. Huge mistake. Shoved wax further down and made myself profoundly deaf. I ignored it for the sake of DH's 40th and our friends staying for New Year (we had such fun) but on New Years Day it started to feel like a real build of pressure and my balance felt squiffy. Have tried everything to get it out (olive oil, special drops, hot water bottles etc). Of course I have not been able to see a doc for love nor money. There was a six hour wait to see a GP at our local walk-in centre yesterday. I nearly cried and had a real loss of faith in the NHS. Anyway I am here now so keep your fingers crossed that the doc can sort me out. Oh, and never, NEVER, clean your ears with Q-Tips!

Indith · 03/01/2012 11:08

Summer I'm very impressed at your dh buying clothes for you even if he did get one wrong! Dh still has not bought me a bag for my birthday (which waas in September) even though I sent him 3 links to ones I liked and pointed out which one I liked best! He claims he doesn't want to get it wrong, how clear do I have to be?

Books, I don't know if you can get it on Kindle but I'm half way through "All My Friends Are Superheroes". It is a short read, I only started it this morning but it is great. Sweet and a bit quirky.

Sybil you need a name change. SaintSybs has an excellent ring to it.

Jolly I did a treasure hunt last year but last year was just a collection of my friends and their kids. This it the first "proper" party with school friends and don't think the house is big enough to do a hunt in. Wish I could be a bit more confident about the weather to do one outside!

Indith · 03/01/2012 11:17

Ooooh Arti I bet you get to have your eears syringed, it will feel amazing after that!

But yes, never, ever use cotton buds in the ear, just use them to mop up stuff that spills out into the bit you can see.

Oh and I expect the French thing is a load of crap. Babies and toddlers and pretty much teh same world over. Of course there are some cultural differences and babies in traditional societies where they are carried and fed on demand a lot longer than here cry less but I rather doubt there is much difference between a French 2 year old and a British one apart from perhaps table manners due to the better habits the French have in general of sitting and eating together (sadly this id becoming more of an old streoptype than a true representation). Sleeping at night maybe has something to do with their love of putting cereals and soups in bottles then shoving them into their babies. At least they used to. My uncle's eldest is 11 now but he also has a 16 month old. The first was adopted so not bf and was given all sorts in bottles. When his new wife was pg I did a fair amount of talk about exclusive bf for 6 months before introducing solids and continuing to feed, no need for bottles etc Grin.