Me and Dave, Dave and Me, or Dave and I?

[SlinkyB]

Please can someone tell me which example I use when?

Some friends caption photos on fb with "Dave and I", but I thought that was incorrect for some reason? I always think it looks too posh for common-as-muck little ol' me, so never use it anyway!

Does anyone have a quick and easy way to remember, pretty please? I'm such a novice with grammar so be gentle

[PurpleWithRed]

Take out Dave and see How it looks. "This is Dave and I" becomes "this is I". Which is wrong. "Here are Dave and I on the beach" becomes " here I am on the beach".

[Purpleball]

Remove Dave from the sentence and you get your answer.

Can you get me a drink = can you get Dave and me a drink

Is there room for me = is there room for Dave and me

I like chips = Dave and I like chips

[DaphneMoonCrane]

Easiest way is to take the other person out of the equation.

Here's a photo of (Dave and) me. (You wouldn't say 'a photo of I'.)

But

(Dave and) I went to the shops. (You wouldn't say 'Me went to the shops'.)

[LineRunner]

Dave and I screwed over the country, said Gideon.

Gideon said, the country has been screwed over by Dave and me.

Subject, object. Take Dave out please take Dave out and it might be easier to see.

[DaphneMoonCrane]

X-post with everyone

[nickelbarapasaurus]

It always depends on context - if you and dave are doing something then it's
"dave and i are doing something"

but if you're just talking about you and dave, then it's
"i'm talking about me and dave"

in Australia, they use "i" more often, but take dave out of the question and it sounds weird.

(there is a disclaimer for archaic language, and one mood or tense or something, but it's far too complicated, so just stick with this for now)

[Steppeoneggs]

and to add to purple, you always name yourself last, so it can never be Me and Dave.

Many people think This is Dave and me. is wrong because they think you have to use I all the time. They are wrong.

[nickelbarapasaurus]

it's polite to name the other person first, but i don't think it's fundamental.

me and dave does sound more common than dave and me, though

[SlinkyB]

Loving the x-posts! Ok, so, the only time you would write "Dave and I" is when it was followed by something like "Dave and I went to the beach". Yes?

Vaguely remember reading before about removing the other person's name to see how it looked/sounded. Also read it's better manners to put yourself last?

[TheOneWiththeNicestSmile]

In formal speech it's preferable to say "X and I went"

Informally, "me and X went" is acceptable (but "X and I went" is still better)

Agree with all PPs that removing X from the phrase clearly indicates whether me or I would be better

[unholyalliance]

Remove the other person is how I taught my children...it also helped to think of us=me/ we =I ...it was given to Dave and me ( it was given to us) vs Dave and I were given a warm welcome ( in Richmond, or similar ) ( we were given a warm welcome)

[Steppeoneggs]

well, I was taught that you always name yourself last, so to be correct, you never say me and Dave.

[YonicScrewdriver]

Liney, I haven't mentioned I love you yet this month, have I?

[unholyalliance]

I think it is infinitely more important to know when to use me or I, than to always put yourself 'last'. (And since my kids' teachers seem unaware, it appears it will be solely up to my DH and me to teach them)

[LineRunner]

No Yonic, it's only the 7th.

[YonicScrewdriver]

[nickelbarapasaurus]

yes, Dave and I went to the beach.

whenever Dave and I do something, I say "dave and I did it".

[SlinkyB]

Thanks for your help all, I'm sure this question has been asked a squillion times!

What about when/where to use "myself" in a sentence? Like when you see people write "Myself and Dave went on holiday there once..." Does the same rule apply re: removing the other person's name and seeing how it looks and sounds?

I think I need to invest in a book

[unholyalliance]

I think 'myself' is often used erroneously when 'me' or 'I' should be used. 'my husband and myself were given' ....again thinking in terms removing the other person gives the answer.

[DrankSangriaInThePark]

You need to ask if 'myself' could be substituted by something like 'on my own'. If so, it's OK.
'I made the cake myself/on my own.
Or if it's the same subject and object with a preposition:
'I took a picture of myself' is fine, but not 'I took a picture of herself'
It is terribly over-used for some reason.

[prism]

Earlier thread:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pedants_corner/2287423-Communication-between-ourselves-and-you

[MumSnotBU]

LineRunner you should offer that Dave and I post as an election poster

[nickelbarapasaurus]

myself is reflexive.

"i can do it myself"
"dave can do it himself"
"you can do it yourself."

basically, you need to already have referred to the subject in the sentence.

"talk to myself" is wrong if you're not talking about you talking to yourself
(ie, in corporate speak)_ - it's mainly because people have had it drummed into them not to use "me" so they think that they can never use "me" when actually, they can use "me" when "me" is correct.

I talk to myself
I invite you to talk to me
You can talk to yourself, but you should really think about talking to me
I'll talk to you

[nickelbarapasaurus]

you can talk to me

[unholyalliance]

'on behalf of my wife and I', at the opening of every wedding speech, really grates. It sounds all wrong to me!