5 week old - is this colic?

(35 Posts)

My DD is five weeks tomorrow, and is a pretty good sleeper at night, going 12-4, 5-7/8. She is in a bed nest (NCT), and is 80% bf, with ff top ups.

However after about 8am, she basically won't sleep. She won't sleep on me, she won't sleep in her crib, she won't sleep in the basket, she won't sleep in the sling. Sometimes she sleeps in the pram if I take her out, but she doesn't stay asleep when the pram stops. She might nap in the bouncy chair sometimes, but just as often it will make her batshit crazy with rage.

She maybe has a couple of 40 min stretches here and there, and on a good day, will go for 3 hours once in the day. This can't be right! All the books say they need hours and hours, she's getting maybe 8 hours on a good day (in 24).
The rest of the day is me rocking, singing, feeding, walking, bouncy chair, anything I can think of that might settle her. She's constantly overtired,but when she refuses sleep, I don't know how to get her to be not overtired. She's frantic half the time, totally unsettled and unhappy.
With a huge amount of work I can get her to catnap, but hardly more. The time it takes to get her to sleep means there's barely time to do anything else ever.

The evenings are worse, it's hours of screaming. Unless she is walked and bounced constantly, she screams, beetroot faced and ironing board rigid. I've tried dummies, singing, music, white noise, Hoover (this will silence her, but only temporarily), every hold I can conceive of, she gets endless winding, I cannot think what it is she needs.
Both DH and I have bad backs already from walking and bouncing her (she was 10lbs at birth, is now well over 11), and tonight I lost it with her, and sat, letting her scream and scream, just saying 'no, I'm not doing this' over and over to her. She won.

I know, I do know that a five week old can't have tantrums, but it really feels like that's what it is.

Any advice, or do I have to suck it up? I'm losing my temper with her constantly and feel like a dreadful person.

Ra88 Fri 21-Feb-14 22:34:29

Have you tried Infacol ? My DS has colic , he is usually quite settled in the day up until about 5pm - 11pm ( apparently this is prime "colic " time ) he is FF only and we had to change his milk to a comfort milk with reduced lactose , he is a lot better than he was but still struggles with his wind .

Ra88 Fri 21-Feb-14 22:38:50

And just to add , you are definitely not a dreadful person , it is so hard when your baby just cries , the first 2 weeks with DS were hell !! 3rd week in now and slowly getting my sanity back

MistletoeBUTNOwine Fri 21-Feb-14 22:47:37

Hi humpy smile
DS (6 weeks) barely sleeps during the day, especially if we're at home. If we go into town he sleeps really well in the sling, seems to like being out and about sad which is great except I don't get to rest.
I'm waiting for when he settles into more of a routine with proper naps. It WILL happen!!
Have a brew and stop trying to get her to sleep, it's counter productive!

MistletoeBUTNOwine Fri 21-Feb-14 22:48:01

*humpty

Infacol helps her wind faster, but no other effects. She won't take Dentinox, and gripe water has no effect.

She does seem more settled when we go out, but as you say, that's not v restful! I can't really keep moving for hours and hours either. That's my problem with the rocking/bouncing thing - it hurts after a few minutes.

I get so fucked off with HV/parents etc saying 'sleep when she sleeps'. She doesn't. I'm still in a reasonable amount of pain from stitches, episiotomy and piles, and all I get told is 'you need to rest more'. I can't, unless I put in earplugs and let her scream herself hoarse.

mistletoe I can't really just 'wait' for it to pass. I either have to bounce/rock/walk her, or listen to her scream. That's pretty much my choices. As for not trying to get her to sleep, I don't really follow? Just ignore her? If she's fed, and changed, she will fuss and fuss and then scream if not picked up and bounced. I know you're trying to help, and I am aware that it ought to get better in a few weeks, but I have no idea how to get through those weeks.

LittleBearPad Sat 22-Feb-14 00:02:00

What happens if you put her in her car seat and drive.

The evening bit sounds like colic.

I always went with sleep begets sleep so if you can keep walking with her in the day then I would Nd hope it makes her less tired and sleep better.

It will pass. Hang in there.

TheScience Sat 22-Feb-14 00:05:14

Sounds like overtiredness rather than colic.

How soon do you start trying to get her to sleep again in the morning? I'd leave it no more than an hour after waking up.

Sleeps begets sleep with little babies, so maybe try a few days of really working on naps and see if that helps? Even if it means walking with the pram 4 times a day.

PuddingAndHotMilk Sat 22-Feb-14 00:09:17

Might it be silent reflux?
Back arching after feeds? Fussing on and off the breast?
Check out some of the other symptoms online but I think that might be your culprit?

You're doing a great job mamma, be kind to yourself thanks

maggiemight Sat 22-Feb-14 00:14:33

I think it's sposed to last for 11 weeks so you are nearly half way there. My DD1 had colic, a miserable time for us and her, and I found the more stressed I was the less well I slept.

It's years ago now and I think she gradually improved then it stopped completely at 11 weeks. I wonder if a warm something on his tummy might help, I didn't do that but as it is like tummy cramps/spasms that might help. One of those wheat-filled things warmed in the microwave (but def not hot).

She was fine once that passed and there is no sign of any long term effects (amazingly!).

milkjetmum Sat 22-Feb-14 01:17:02

Our dd was colicy and a battry powered rocking swing was our life saver. We had the graco zebra loving hugs swing. swaddled her up, dummy in, and put her in at max speed with max volume white noise. This was the way we got her to take daytime naps, and it would usually buy us enough time to eat our dinner at least in the evening. Once she was sound asleep we would turn it off and transfer her swaddled to her basket.

It does feel like an eternity when people say don't worry Theyll grow out of it at 3 months... Just take it one day at a time. Good luck.

No car, sadly, or I'd drive her round in circles if it helped!

Will have to keep on trying with the naps. At the moment, I offer boob almost as soon as she wakes, then when she's fed and changed, start trying to get her back to sleep. If/when she seems super alert, I put her on her playmat for ten mins or play with her, pulling faces etc.
So often, she has a good feed, goes sleepy, then startles or farts or coughs or otherwise wakes up as she's on the point of sleep, at which point it's like she's missed the window for sleeping and we enter the vicious cycle of overtiredness, as she cries until her next feed.
She's just had her usual 4.30 am feed, and I am now cuddling her through several rounds of startling/stretching herself almost awake. If I manage this, she will go into proper sleep, but v often I lose and the startle/stretch/hitting herself in the face wins and she wakes up.
Swaddling so good when she's calm. When not, it makes her insane with rage.

LittleBearPad Sat 22-Feb-14 08:18:40

Hope she fell asleep and you got some sleep too.

Can your DH (or mum or another family person/friend) take her for a walk today for an hour or two so you can get a break?

If it helps read ab

LittleBearPad Sat 22-Feb-14 08:19:55

Read about the fourth trimester (google it). It won't help her sleep but it might make you feel better that this is all normal and it will change in a few weeks.

littlebear she did! thank you. The walk/break is a great idea, I'll ask DH, I'm sure he would.
I'll read up on fourth trimester, thanks for the suggestion and for bearing with my complaints; the evenings just seem endless, and it helps to have advice and sympathy.

Okay, decided to take your advice and focus on naps today. She woke at 8.30am, fed (boob) unwillingly, with quite a lot of latching on and off, but I think this is because she has a cold.
Then she fussed for nearly an hour, start-stop crying, needed changing, lots of winding, then decided she was hungry, had 15mls of formula which she puked back up. More crying and fussiness, endless walking, bouncing, singing, rocking, and it's now 11.20 and she's yawning, but wide awake.
The pattern is different every day, sometimes she cluster feeds first thing, the puking is only occasional, so I'm pretty sure it's not a serious factor. The only constant is the refusal to drop off to sleep.

So, what do I do? I can't force her to sleep, and she is determined to refuse to sleep, despite clearly needing to.

MissHC Sat 22-Feb-14 12:48:52

Right this is exactly what DD was like. She's now 13 weeks and has been on anti-reflux medication since 2 weeks which has made a big difference. My mum said to get her checked for silent reflux. Symptoms were a lot of swallowing, always blowing 'bubbles', screaming in agony with arched back.
Get her checked by your GP. Good luck!

MissHC I'll ask them to check at her 6 week checkup. She feeds well in the night, and goes back to sleep peacefully, though, which is why I don't think it's a physiological thing. But worth checking!

It's now half 1 and she's had two ten min naps since 8.30am. She's fretful and fussy, but refuses to settle. Still.

MissHC Sat 22-Feb-14 13:49:05

Yes DD was fine during the night as well the first 10 weeks. Got quite bad after that which is why I finally took my mum's advice and took her to GP. I thought she was just 'colicky' as that's what you read in baby books.

LittleBearPad Sat 22-Feb-14 14:38:20

What would happen if you put her in her pram and just walked (or DH did).

Alternatively what happens if you let her sleep on you during the day. Thr latter meant I watched a lot of shit tv but dd dud sleep.

Finally try baby got colic on YouTube. It sounds awful but it worked wonders.

TheScience Sat 22-Feb-14 14:40:25

Will she go to bed with you and feed to sleep?

JiltedJohnsJulie Sat 22-Feb-14 15:28:30

What happens if you offer the breast again? Has she been checked for tongue tie? Have a read of the symptoms and see if anything sounds familiar smile

MistletoeBUTNOwine Sat 22-Feb-14 16:17:12

I meant trying as in hoping she'll sleep so you can... Came out wrong, baby mistletoe barely slept last night so I'm all fuddled. Dp took him downstairs at 8 this morning and I slept til 11.30 (he gave him a bottle grin) was bliss!
Could your oh/ anyone else take her for a few hours so you could catch up?

littlebear took her for a walk at 2, she woke once while out for a feed, and once when we got back. I think we've made a little progress today, as she is now back asleep (on me, but that's fine, I can happily spend a few weeks on the sofa under a sleeping baby!) and seemed happy at both wake ups.

That tongue tie link is v interesting; I've been topping up with formula, assuming that was b/c of her size (98th centile) but maybe she's not bfing properly, she has some symptoms... How do I get her checked? HV?

Thank you for the advice!

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