So..... apparently parents with ADHD children are "unscrupulous&q uot;. Still if it paves the way for cutting DLA then that's okay - after all we're just milking the system

(103 Posts)
DillyDaydreaming Sun 06-Feb-11 13:26:58

here

What a pile of shite.

My son received his ADHD diagnosis alongside one of ASD. I didn't SEEK the diagnosis and never even considered it until the paediatrician brought it up. The paediatrician based that opinion on extensive observations and reports of my DS - it certainly was not "just a tick box" affair. Even then it was not conformed for several months for further observations and assessments.

And if the head teacher quoted is SO sure it's just a parent milking the system why is she aiding a positive diagnosis by ticking her "tick boxes" in a positive way>

Stupid bloody woman - just hope she never gets withing 100 feet of MY son because with teachers like that he needs NO enemies. In fact she might wish to meet my son - he is NOT disruptive/bouncing off the walls. Instead he is much quieter and struggles to maintain focus and attention enough to understand the curriculum without visual aids and support. Nor is he on any medication.

What a shite report and what a shite head teacher. We are not all milking the system - as a mother and as a health professional I can tell you there are many more of us who don't seek a diagnosis because we don't suspect ADHD until it is suggested.

Still if it makes people feel more friendly to the idea of cutting DLA I assume that's okay with Shiney Dave and his pals in power.

angryangryangry

And fwiw - all assessments of my DS suggest he will do well in life - he will work (just as I do), pay taxes (just as I do) but hey - lets stuff ALL parents doing their best - shuffle them all into the "shit parents" pile and cut off all support - that'll learn em!

salomawe Mon 11-Feb-13 19:50:53

My stepson has been through this process and was diagnosed with ADHD so I thought I would share his experience with you. He was diagnosed at age 7 years and 6 months old. After a year medicated with Concerta (Methylphenidate Hydrochloride) in April 2012 his mum could no longer cope with his behaviour and constant arguments, so she said she didn't want him living with her any more. The medication gave him motor tics, stomach ache, itchy skin, insomnia, lethargy, lack of appetite, high blood pressure, affected his short term memory and slowed his cognitive processing. He continued to make slow progress at school where the teacher told him she didn't have time to teach him and the only sessions he enjoyed at school were lunch time, play time and home time. He moved in with me and his dad and changed schools. I withdrew the drug completely within the first week, changed his diet to a more natural diet (high protein, vegetables, fruit, complex carbohydrates, no sugar or simple carbohydrates, only water or milk to drink), introduced discipline, routines, boundaries, exercise, constructive play, verbally teaching all tasks he needs to learn, regular bedtime 7:30pm 7 days a week. Out of bed 8:00am Monday to Friday, 8:30am Saturday and Sunday. After a follow up assessment at CAHMS November 2012, his blood pressure had gone back to normal, they were not familiar with the severe learning disability non verbal learning disorder, I had uncovered and suggested he no longer needed to be on their register as he did not now appear to have ADHD. Spending time understanding my stepson's needs, I uncovered a hidden severe learning disability. The disability is effectively invisible unless you know what you are looking for. He does enjoy going to school now but has difficulties with adaptive learning, creative writing, social cues, language interpretation (takes everything literally) and organising himself (slow adapting to a switch in learning environment, getting changed for P.E, packing bag at end of lessons, poor spacial awareness, low self awareness, poor and slow writing ability, poor comprehension, can't read between the lines, doesn't understand anything that has not been verbally taught, can't adapt previous learning to new situations, inability to think creatively. Having persisted with the Local Education Authority and not accepting their initial refusal to assess him for a Statement of Special Educational Needs; the assessment is now in progress and as part of that assessment CAHMS have provided on my request, a referral to a paediatrician to examine a neurological cause of his impaired learning progress and behaviour. Could your children be saved from the debilitating side effects that come with medication? It is definitely worth exploring a neurological cause and a process of managing the challenges with alternative intervention as described in this post because your child could also have an invisible learning disability.

Just coming back to this. Ugh, didn't realise this was such an old thread. Yes, WHY on earth dredge it up other than to cause trouble?

<gets back to DS's impossible DLA forms>

Triggles Thu 03-May-12 21:29:45

sorry... NO point...

Triggles Thu 03-May-12 21:29:26

Star I reported this earlier tonight. I see point in the person renewing this thread other than trolling.

StarshitTerrorise Thu 03-May-12 21:14:16

And the reason parents in genuine need have to fight tooth and nail is because of ignorant people like you, not because a number of any significance manage fraud.

StarshitTerrorise Thu 03-May-12 21:09:22

'how are the medical people suppose to react,to them the child may well have ADHD the background of these poor kids will not be scrutanised,regarding parenting, lifestyle housing,etc etc,nobody in a proffesional capacity is gonna turn round and say they may be culpable for their childs behaviour are they

thats how its obtained and the people that are blagging it get CAB/social worker etc to do form filling'

You clearly know nothing of the diagnostic process. The FIRST thing that is scrutinised in often barbaric ways is the parenting and environmental aspects. Parents are put through hell and sent on training etc. it is only when nothing seems to work that, years later, with swarms of now involved different professionals who have got to know the family and parents, can reports be written that eventually lead to a medical Dx.

God help the kids with ADHD AND crap parents!

StarshitTerrorise Thu 03-May-12 21:01:03

Why has this zombie been raised now?

perceptionreality Thu 03-May-12 20:57:13

Until seeing the recent comments on this thread, I had no idea that there are people who are actually jealous of families who have children with special needs because they get extra financial support from the state. Children who will never in a million years be able to live the lives that NT people can.........

ouryve Thu 03-May-12 19:36:30

Oh, loving, how sweet of you to resurrect a year old thread so say how unfair on your poor children it is that kids with disabilities and their families have life soooo much easier because they get so much for free.

Term time job? I went out for lunch with my parents, who I only get to see every few months, on Monday and school were frantically trying to contact me because DS1 had gone into a violent rage over a maths book. No, the money he gets for having ASD and ADHD haven't cured him or made him any less miserable but, even with another child in receipt of DLA, plus carers' allowance, my income is far smaller than when I had a full time term time professional job which I couldn't go back to. It replaces a lot of broken stuff, though.

Triggles Thu 03-May-12 19:23:38

I'm going to respond to the only bit of intelligence in the thread at all and say this....

Party bags are shite anyway. Why give them out at all? hmm grin

perceptionreality Thu 03-May-12 10:34:32

Yes loving, perhaps you would like to swap with me and try to cope with a 10 year old who destroys things, spends her day trying to escape out of locked windows and doors, can't talk (much) and runs in front of cars. Oh, and who also can't dress herself, feed herself and is up all night.

After all she's got the same problems as your child right?

parents who have children like this cannot easily work full time or at all. And our children will never be able to work as adults did you ever think of that?

(wonders why I let myself be drawn into this)

perceptionreality Thu 03-May-12 10:23:49

"there are parents that claim fraudently im afraid,it happens,trouble is these kids dont stand a chance in life because of their parents,ive seen it a couple of times myself,i know the process isnt easy bt these kids often show "traits" that is not through a medical condition but crap parenting,

how are the medical people suppose to react,to them the child may well have ADHD the background of these poor kids will not be scrutanised,regarding parenting, lifestyle housing,etc etc,nobody in a proffesional capacity is gonna turn round and say they may be culpable for their childs behaviour are they

thats how its obtained and the people that are blagging it get CAB/social worker etc to do form filling"
____________________________________

This is absolute bolleaux. The DWP themselves have said that DLA fraud is almost non-existent.

Furthermore, HCPs giving a child a diagnosis because they don't want to tell the parent they are not parenting properly?? (laughs) You clearly have no idea how difficult it is to get a diagnosis in writing from a HCP even when the diagnosis is obvious.

People like you are the reason why children with genuine difficulties are instead considered to be 'naughty'.

FanjoForTheMammaries Thu 03-May-12 09:12:09

Can't believe someone has dredged up this thread just to start a bunfight.

DLA is not for kids struggling the same as other kids just going through a difficult time.

My DD gets it and she can't speak or feed or dress herself and is still in nappies at 5.5. Hardly the same as being a bit fed up at school.

Loving, you should be ashamed to post such tripe.

thekidsrule Thu 03-May-12 09:04:59

nice,sorry the comment i made was at amber not you

apologies

NiceHamione Thu 03-May-12 07:22:09

The kidsrule I am not venting my anger and I did point out that when people try to play the system IME they do not get away with it, although there is a perception that they do.

"There was a report the other day about how trials have showed changing the food the kids eat eliminated ADHD in a lot of cases"

The brain of a person with ADHD is different, this cannot be denied because it shows upon scans. Whilst chemicals can help to change how the brain works, they certainly could not completely remove a condition.

Some of the behaviour may be modified by changing diet, but it cannot be cured. This usually applies tofoods with additives and colourings.

Most parents don't need to be told this. Having a child that can have as little as four hours sleep, is hard going and if it was as easy as changing diet, then it would be erradicated because most parents try this, first.

Also if it was that easy, there would be no adults with ADHD, it is often forgotten that this doesn't go away at 16, just because the GP signs the patient off, but they are yet to young to be picked up by adult services.

AmberLeaf Wed 02-May-12 23:44:58

Yep.

thekidsrule Wed 02-May-12 23:35:12

really,you obviously dont know people that play the system then,get real

vent your anger that the people that do,oh sorry that dosent happen in your world does it,well it does mine

its not hard, the genuine get a hard time because they do it by the book,some dont have much experience of the benefit system, play the condition down,dont understand the language needed for a DLA claim so yes their at a disadvantage,for some this will be the first benefit theyve ever claimed,but they learn and learn who can help them,but after a real education regarding the DLA process

but yeah another load of crap i suppose

NiceHamione Wed 02-May-12 23:27:45

There clearly are parents who try to defraud the system, I have dealt with them myself but as others have said they tend not to get dla. Fraud rates with dla are very low .

AmberLeaf Wed 02-May-12 23:16:35

How comes the genuine cases have to fight tooth and nail yet according to you the fakers get it all on a plate so easily?

Its ok dont answer I know already...its because you're talking crap

thekidsrule Wed 02-May-12 23:02:20

there are parents that claim fraudently im afraid,it happens,trouble is these kids dont stand a chance in life because of their parents,ive seen it a couple of times myself,i know the process isnt easy bt these kids often show "traits" that is not through a medical condition but crap parenting,

how are the medical people suppose to react,to them the child may well have ADHD the background of these poor kids will not be scrutanised,regarding parenting, lifestyle housing,etc etc,nobody in a proffesional capacity is gonna turn round and say they may be culpable for their childs behaviour are they

thats how its obtained and the people that are blagging it get CAB/social worker etc to do form filling

BUT

i really do believe it exsists in children and the ones that genuinley have this condition and their familys doneed the extra support,not just benefits but the whole social structure from local councils offering respite to groups etc for both the child and the family

the sad case is that those that have genuine need have to fight tooth and nail for their DC's,the dc's suffer the family suffer (i would say that there must be a high % of seperations) due to stress depression,the list is endless

so yes it goes on,but i believe it does exist,i really hate the fact that the genuine have to fight so hard for even basic help

life must seem pretty tough alot of the time to those that cope with these pressures

AmberLeaf Wed 02-May-12 19:58:12

I think not all but most have found this loopwhole which pays carers if there is a disabled child and so they are jumping on it and recieveing 250 in tax credits per month extra and 50 per week as a carer thats 450 per child. Discusting why does that child deserve more than my child when he struggles with life just as much as others who are going through a difficult time?

Is your child disabled? how does he struggle with life just as much as others who are going through a difficult time [what exactly does that mean]

Lougle Wed 02-May-12 19:44:13

hmm Cory

Surely you would make them carry the picnic baskets because they get too many perks and the 11 other poor sausages don't get a look in hmm

cory Wed 02-May-12 18:02:47

"tell me this if you had a birthday party and invited 15 children out of the 15, 4 of them had ADHD would you then give those children extra in their goody bags and an extra prize for the part games? im guessing the answer is no as you should treat all children equilly."

and if you took 15 children out for a picnic and 4 of them had amputated legs, would you tell them all they had to walk up the hill, because everybody should be treated the same?

perceptionreality Tue 01-May-12 23:34:38

Lougle, people who type stuff like this

"tell me this if you had a birthday party and invited 15 children out of the 15, 4 of them had ADHD would you then give those children extra in their goody bags and an extra prize for the part games? im guessing the answer is no as you should treat all children equilly."

are really not worth engaging with.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now