If I admit that I have PND, what will my GP/Health visitor do?

[Swaliswan]

I know that I'm not feeling right. I know that if I'm being honest, I have PND. I also know that I don't want to be labelled or given antidepressants. I was like this after DC1 and things resolved with more sleep. DC3 is a poor sleeper. I'm trying to work on him learning how to re-settle so that I can actually get some deep sleep. I haven't had any deep sleep since DC3 came out of hospital about 2 months ago. He is now 5.5 months old. I don't know what else to write other than I feel like I can't cope. I need to snap out of this and then I'll be more able to cope with our 3 little ones again...

I think admitting you have a problem is half the battle won. The other half is actually doing something about it. I'm not sure what help can be given by gp or health visitor it will depend on their resources and you may be disappointed, but if you do not ask for help it can't be given.
So, I'm praying for you that you will pick up the phone and make that call. What you have said on here explains it very well, so print out what you have written on here if you are afraid you will not get it across because you are crying.
Best of luck and let us know how you are getting on.

Hi there, I know how you feel, I have three, my third is now 18 months and when he was 6 weeks I went to my GP because I was so tired and so anxious and stressed. You don't have to take antidepressants, I was offered them, tried them, hated them, stopped. So I tried other methods such as a bit of hypnotherapy, I had some group therapy run by the local health visitors which was brilliant, I am at the moment going through CBT councelling which is wonderful (albeit rather late in my opinion but the waiting list was 12 months), I tried some homeopathy too. I feel lots better now. I don't think I was labelled. There are things you can do besides taking pills to help and your GP will be able to help you :)

It differs from area to area what your GP or HV will do, as well as what they think about how seriously depressed you are. I get the impression that these are some of the kinds of things which mumsnetters including myself have been offered:
(some or all of the following)
simply a follow up appt in a couple of weeks to see how you are
leaflets eg from the postnatal illness association
therapy- one to one or group, short or long
meeting you weekly to see how you are
putting you in touch with other depressed mothers eg a local discussion group
advice on exercise, diet, coping strategies, things which are worrying you like sleep
drugs/ offer of drugs (they will not be forced on you)
referral to homestart, if wanted
putting in touch with specialised services like mother and baby units (if you are very ill)

My strong advice is always to talk to your GP or HV and not to suffer alone.

Support offered varies a lot from area to area. The only thing you can do is ask. Also a lot depends on the serverity of your symptoms.

If you don't want to take medication then you coud try online CBT like
www.livinglifetothefull.com

These are good books.
www.amazon.co.uk/Resilience-Factor-Finding-Strength-Overcoming/dp/0767911911/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1307453203&sr=8-1

www.amazon.co.uk/Brilliant-Cognitive-Behavioural-Therapy-Improve/dp/0273724908/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1307453243&sr=1-1

Nine years ago I found group theraphy with health visitors a complete disaster. Gawd knows what my health visitor was thinking of when she referred me.

I know that my health visitor runs a 10 week postnatal depression course but I am a bit fearful about what I would be letting myself in for!

The thing is, I know that this has started from a lack of sleep and getting more sleep definitely helps. If someone could tell me that in a month's time DS would be sleeping better than that alone would help me feel like I could climb out of this hole. But, as I don't know when I am going to get the sleep that I need or if that will be enough to 'sort me out', I feel like I need to do something. I know that antidepressants would help but I'm not keen on taking them whilst BFing, I don't know if I could look after the 3 DCs during the first week or two of side effects and iirc, they were OK at helping me feel better when I had them before but I was quite numb to the happy moments and I don't want to miss out on feeling the joy of motherhood.

DH is trying to help out more at home although I don't think that he really understands what I am going through. He is away quite often this month and that isn't helping. I am trying to get more rest myself and do things that interest me but sometimes it is hard to get to sleep or get the motivation together to do something that I enjoy. I look around at the state of the house and feel disheartened/overwhelmed. I know that even if the house was tidier/cleaner than I would mentally feel better but DS is such a clingy boy that so often things don't get done and then I feel like I have failed.

I need to work out a flexible plan about how to get on top of things, get enough rest and when to go and ask for help if I don't improve/get worse. It's not fair on the children to live with me like this so I need to sort something out.

Sorry to go on, it helps to write it all down.

Swaliswan, I think you have to ask your HV what exacty the course involves. If she is teaching you relaxation techniques or thinking skills or assertiveness then it could be really helpful.

The group theraphy course I went on was a disaster as I was far too ill at the time.