Why on earth would you go state if you could afford private?

(1000 Posts)
Schmedz Wed 20-Feb-13 11:51:37

This thread is for Maisie and happygardening wink. I like dares!

seeker Wed 20-Feb-13 13:11:42

And what Abycat said.

NewFerry Wed 20-Feb-13 13:12:29

"This thread is for Maisie and happygardening . I like dares!"

You are aware that HG has one child in state school while the other boards at private school aren't you? confused

Arisbottle Wed 20-Feb-13 13:13:41

Seeker we still have 2 more to go grin

We tend to see a job through until it is done though! Something I picked up from my state school!

seeker Wed 20-Feb-13 13:14:38

It's a wind up thread, new ferry. No reason why we can't tell them, thought!

Steppemum - yes, we do have more money than most, and as such some might call us rich. Fair enough.

We have only gone private for secondary though, and that is 6 years in Scotland, not 7 as in England. Plus, we can't quite afford it out of income so have saved up in advance.

But as you say, rich means "having more money than us!" I would call us well off certainly, but not rich.

TotallyBS Wed 20-Feb-13 13:15:24

Many parents choose a state school despite having the means to go private because their local state is the right fit for their DCs. Just because one is well off does not mean that by default that they want to hot house their DCs or that they attach much importance to their DCs being educated in grand historic buildings.

Other parents prefer a state school because it, goes their reasoning, offers their DC a more diversified education. Well, my local comp is predominantly white MC Brit families whereas the local indie is a mixture of Asians, Orientals, Africans, Europeans and of course British. So it's a bit silly for some parents to argue that their DCs are getting a more diverse education at their predominantly white MC Brit state school.

Some parents will argue that they don't believe in buying an education for their children. Of course them paying a premium price for a house near the school gate of a highly ranked state school isn't them buying an education for their DCs .

JakeBullet Wed 20-Feb-13 13:17:04

My son is in state school (primary) at the moment and it has been fabulous for him. However approaching secondary level (he is only Y5 so far) I wish so much I could afford a private school for him....he is autistic and I am not sure he will cope in MS secondary. State special schools seem to only cater for extreme special needs and my DS is in between. Would love to have the option if private now.

steppemum Wed 20-Feb-13 13:18:54

socareless - sarcastic 'get off the thread' comments not necessary

It may surprise you to know that people do actually consider these things when they don't currently have the disposable income.

The op says 'if'

So - 'if' I could afford it, would I send them to private school?

The answer is probably not, for the reasons I listed
And also for the reasons I have listed I might think differently if all our local schools were crap and/or I lived in a place (eg London) where schools are struggling with being over subscribed.

As I said, I have thought hard about looking for bursaries and/or scholarships as ds is very bright, and we have decided not to ie, not to choose private by that route either

MirandaWest Wed 20-Feb-13 13:20:52

If I did have the money for private education but had good state schools I would rather the DC went to state school and we spent the money on other things.

nagynolonger Wed 20-Feb-13 13:22:38

Because my eldest 3 were already doing very well at a state comp before I discovered MN and found out that it mattered.

If only 7% go to private schools it's fairly obvious that outside the SE a much lower percentage do. In this area every child goes from village primaries to the feeder comp. That includes DC of teacher, doctors dentists etc.

Paying fees for all six of my DC would mean giving up more than Skytv and holidays. It would never have been an option. Also I wanted a large family.

Branleuse Wed 20-Feb-13 13:26:16

Maybe it just is that there are good state schools here. There really are and lots of choice. They certainly advertise which schools catchment area houses are in on estate agents boards etc (for the good ones in affluent areas)and there are very middle/upper class state schools.

When someone is walking with their children in their little private school uniforms round here, its usually assumed its a status symbol rather than necessary.

Im not dead against private or anything, I just havent really seen it as necessary,

maybe I just dont care about my kids as much as the private school parents do ;)

TotallyBS Wed 20-Feb-13 13:26:52

Schmedz - it isn't a no-brainer. An affluent area doesn't by default equal outstanding academic state schools.

Dromedary Wed 20-Feb-13 13:32:47

State primaries have advantages over private schools, in my view. From what I have seen they encourage more independent working, and have a more interesting, fun and practical curriculum (eg I much prefer the way that they teach maths and English - the maths is based on practical methods of doing the kind of maths you need in day to day life, rather than pure algebra, and the English is far more creative than the grammar, spelling and comprehension stuff they do in private schools). They are also well geared at teaching different ability groups within the same class, which is not always the case with private prep schools. And there is more diversity in the other children there, which I think is likely to make your children into nicer adults. There is less of the issue of other children going on lovely holidays or having big cars, etc. And you have a right to have your child in the school - if you disagree with the head over something you're not liable to have your child asked to leave the school. Also the risk of having to withdraw the child if you lose your job etc isn't hanging over you.

seeker Wed 20-Feb-13 13:34:15

" An affluent area doesn't by default equal outstanding academic state schools."

No. But it is likely to indicate a higher achieving peer group. In general for all sorts of reasons, better off children do better at school than poorer ones. Please note the use of the phrase "in general"

trinity0097 Wed 20-Feb-13 13:45:48

I hate how people with very little experience of private schools always assume that every family is really wealthy. I work in a prep school and we have children from a wide variety of family incomes, many parents work really hard to afford the fees and sacrifice things like holidays etc to afford the fees, others are multi-millionaires and can afford to come to school occasionally by helicopter! Some families are extremely hard up, you wouldn't know it to look at the children, but the school might have paid for their uniform when it needed replacing. I would say that the bulk of the parents are very middle class and for many the fees are paid in full or part by the grandparents.

1805 Wed 20-Feb-13 13:53:06

We can afford private (with help), and I always intended dc to go to state school. No one in either my or dh families have ever been privately educated. my brothers kids are state educated, you get the picture......

DC both started local primary, and we were so shocked at the lack of ambition / low aspirations / low expectations we took them out. Both dh and I visit private and state schools in our jobs and the difference for us made the decision very easy.

However, if the local school had met our expectations, they would still be there.

Nobody can make any judgements about state v private because schools and children vary so much.

I think what would be wrong would be a parent denying their dc an opportunity to be happy/fulfilled/(in any walk of life) purely because of their own political views.

seeker Wed 20-Feb-13 13:54:59

I don't assume that every family at private school is really wealthy. However, I know that every family at private school is significantly better off than most. With the exception of the few who are on full bursaries.

But I'm not sure why matters on this thread-which is an "if you could afford it" question.

1805 Wed 20-Feb-13 14:13:41

Seeker - you can't say that!

lots of choice of state schools...

Bwaa haa haa!
Here we had the choice between non-denominational and catholic. We are atheists BTW. Some choice! Oh, unless you count the choice that goes "you can put a non-catchment school on your form but if it's a good one you haven't a hope in hell of getting in!"

morethanpotatoprints Wed 20-Feb-13 14:19:11

Maybe the local state school is better than the nearest private school.
Maybe it suits your needs better.
Maybe it offers greater opportunities.
Because it is a parents responsibility to provide their dc with an education and this is what they have chosen.

seeker Wed 20-Feb-13 14:20:16

What can't I say?

TheSecondComing Wed 20-Feb-13 14:23:32

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

1805 Wed 20-Feb-13 14:27:31

Yes NGNB - that's what I want. Here we are semi rural and have the choice of........1 secondary school, and I think I counted 6 private seniors easily within reach, and more for dd.

We enjoy our lifestyle and chose to buy the education rather than move into the city.

Had the options been 6+ state schools and one private, I know where the dc would be. (state).

1805 Wed 20-Feb-13 14:29:15

Seeker - the bit about KNOWING the financial situation of every privately educated child in the uk.

Speculate yes, but Know - no!

seeker Wed 20-Feb-13 14:33:46

But I can know. You cannot send you chd to private school unless you have access to more disposable income than most people. There was a
Long thread on the subject recently.

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