From what i understand of this thread (as i cant really find any others) its a place where youre told if youre being unreasonable/selfish or a bit of an ass...
Ill start off by saying im 15 years old (I turn 16 in February of 2015) and ive not long found out im pregnant, going by my period and calculations im between 10 and 12 weeks (also have been semi attached to the bathroom for the last month...)
ive had a LOAD of problems in the last 6 years, including domestic violence within my family (mother and father) which only really became apparent to me when he faced going to prison (when i was 8/9), when i was 13 i was sexually attacked by a family member, sorry if this is too much to share but im anonymous so not much more i can do to give you the whole picture :/ when i was 13 up until i turned 15, my life hit a downward spiral. drugs, sex, alcohol and worse was fair game to me... i attempted to overdose one week after i was attacked, (was living with my dad at the time we no longer speak due to these events) no one found me, no one came for me and no one looked for me... i woke up 11 hours later covered in my sick which smelt of whiskey and had bits of paracetamol in it, luckily my body had rejected it and i was fine. but the original point that no one came looking burned into my brain. i moved back in with my mother, where i got ALOT worse, drinking 3x more, smoking 60 a day, not going to school and not bothering with anything constructive, id go out at 7;30 to take the bus to school and be gone for 3 days easily. i also started self harming around that point. even now im covered in scars across my forearms, thighs, hips and wrists.
throughout this time the relationship id had with my mother suffered alot. she attacked me twice, told me to go play with my razors, told me she'd be better off without me. i think maybe she suffered too due to her own past with my father, i took stuff out on her too. in these last few months while ive gotten better shes gotten progressively worse, shouting constantly, crying, screaming, hitting me every so often and most recently pinning me to the wall with her knee, by my stomach, id found out i was pregnant just days before, so i walked out and came to my boyfriends house. im happy here and its calm no shouting no screaming no hitting and no atmosphere. she knows she is to blame for my RECENT behaviour (which includes just coming to my boyfriends, to basically hide from the world) the last time she called the police to report me missing i was getting texts and emails from police officers until i called the number id been sent and said straight up that id be home when ready and its no ones concern (yes it was a bit bratty of me i'll admit that) i rarely go 'home' to my mothers, im there at most 8 days a month all together because i just cant stand it there... today is my big sisters birthday, shes 22, shes pretty neutral to our mother because she suffered it to and left home at 16 as a result, i cant even go to my sisters to wish her a happy birthday because my mum will be there and does always try to cause a scene if and when she can :/ i think you get the jist. sorry i went on so long... basically i just wanna know if its bad of me to run for the hills as fast as i can as often as i can until im 16 (again if calculations are correct baby will be here april ish i think so ill be 16), put my baby first and cut down contact with my mother completely? i love her, i feel guilty for this but she just makes me feel so hurt, frustrated, on edge and angry :/ also sorry if im in the wrong place just wanted to know that, be helpful to get perspective off older women too (no offence..)
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AIBU?
Not sure if im in the right place but I need advice regarding pregnancy/my mother.
51 replies
Random1999 · 15/09/2014 05:00
OP posts:
Frusso ·
15/09/2014 11:32
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