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To expect people to take there shoes off? Sorry rant ahead!

(327 Posts)
Damash12 Sat 16-Mar-13 22:07:46

We've recently had a new carpet and it's not f@@;ing rocket science to see we have added a shoe rack near the back door but why do people look at you with a put out expression when they ask the question "do I need to take my shoes off?" and you reply "yes". And what's worse is those that know but still choose to walk in and just not bother or the best one, those that keep their shoes on and bloody tip toe around the place, like that makes it ok. I've actually had 1 visitor roll there eyes when I've asked them to come round the back, it's about 5 yards FFS!! Rant over!

louisianablue2000 Sun 17-Mar-13 23:35:49

I think it's so precious to demand people take their shoes off to protect your carpet. I wouldn't wear dirty shoes in someone's house but if I'm nicely dressed my shoes are clean. There's an episode of Sex and the City about this!

Even worse are people who insist on removing their shoes uninvited when they come to my house. It feels overfamiliar and makes me itch, yeuch. I never wear shoes at home normally (because it's home) but put them on when we have people coming round so they don't think they can take their shoes off.

OrbisNonSufficit Sun 17-Mar-13 23:37:22

Tee hee hee someone said the 'c' word...

sneezingwakesthebaby Sun 17-Mar-13 23:40:00

If your shoes have been outside, they aren't clean.

pigsDOfly Sun 17-Mar-13 23:52:52

No Fierce, dog's feet are cleaned before coming into carpeted part of the house when she's been outside.

WafflyVersatile Mon 18-Mar-13 00:02:30

And her bum?

pigsDOfly Mon 18-Mar-13 00:19:50

Didn't say I was neurotic about it Waffly, or particularly logical. I just don't like people's shoes all over the carpet, especially if it's been snowing or raining.

Anyway, my dog's bum is delightful. smile

WafflyVersatile Mon 18-Mar-13 00:45:29

I remember a particularly enjoyable routine of Stewart Lee's where he goes on about his mum's cat's paw towel she kept in the downstairs wc.

WafflyVersatile Mon 18-Mar-13 00:46:43

Other people's homes* are a foreign country.

*and families.

crashdoll Mon 18-Mar-13 09:49:31

PigsDOfly I also wipe my dog's paws and also wipe my shoes. Same thing, right? Incidentally, the grass is so wet and muddy in the garden, I am considering getting the dog wellies, so perhaps I am PFLF (precious first laminate flooring). shock

LondonNinja Mon 18-Mar-13 10:13:38

I'm almost tempted to bring in the 'what do we do if other people's homes are too cold/hot?' and 'can we wear coats in others' freezing homes, or is it rude to try to stay warm?' debate. That was just as polarised.

But I won't grin

exoticfruits Mon 18-Mar-13 10:25:24

You just do exactly the same-put up with it. I will take my shoes off if asked-I just try and avoid visiting in the future!

KellyElly Mon 18-Mar-13 11:39:10

I personally think it's rude to ask your visitors to take their shoes off. Unless they have been trekking through a bog surely a wipe on the mat will suffice.

themaltesecat Mon 18-Mar-13 12:12:48

If you expect people to take off their shoes, you have to provide slippers.

zlist Mon 18-Mar-13 12:35:48

I don't like shoes on carpets but I also don't like asking guests to remove their shoes. For this reason I have hard floors over nearly all of the downstairs on the house. It is also a pain to keep taking my own shoes off and on if coming in and out of the house a lot!
I usually stop say I will take my shoes off (before I actually do it) if I am invited into part of someones home that has carpet - if they don't want me to then they simply stop me and I'll keep them on (unless it is a party where everyone else is keeping their shoes on!).

When I take my shoes off I am wearing SOCKS... (not grossing you out with my bare feet)

TheBigJessie Mon 18-Mar-13 12:49:01

Here is a question for the legions of carpet lovers on here. Why, oh why, since you are all obsessed with keeping them 'nice' do you buy pale coloured carpets....? It seems that some of you live your lives in a constant panic that your wonderful white carpet or sofa will gain a mark or blemish of some sort and then you would probably have a meltdown. This is no way to live - and I would HATE to live with a person like that, it must be so stressful for your families.

I don't and have never bought anything cream, whether sofa or carpet. My landlords, on the other hand... Do you get the point I'm making?

When I have bought carpets, they were dark red or blue (it cost £100 for the entire flat) and I still didn't want people wearing shoes inside. I don't want to sit on dirt from outside while watching television in my dressing gown.

exoticfruits Mon 18-Mar-13 13:10:52

NO,NO and NO! I do wish people would get the message that although we may not like it we take them off-however I am not going to wear anyone else's slippers.
I am surprised that people wear socks all year. From May to September I have shoes on bare feet.

Jins Mon 18-Mar-13 13:33:17

Oooh I love a shoe thread.

We're a shoes off on carpet house. Most visitors don't get past the hall or the kitchen so the issue doesn't arise. One room downstairs has carpet and most people take their shoes off when they go in. If they don't I'm not overly concerned.

In other people's houses I try to do what they are doing. If there's piles of shoes all over the hall then I take mine off. If everyone is tramping round in shoes then I leave mine on. (If I spot a Henry Hoover I'm never happy about taking my shoes off because the carpetes will be dirty smile)

In all I'm pretty easy going but what I WON'T do is put a pair of manky guest slippers on my feet. Oh no. Slippers are fucking revolting things and I'm not padding round someone's house in a pair.

Also if someone is hovering preciously and paying more attention to the carpet than the conversation I will laugh at them with DH when we're home and never go back smile

Shodan Mon 18-Mar-13 13:46:08

I personally feel that demanding/asking people to remove their shoes is unspeakably rude, but if you really, really feel that your made to walk on floor is that precious, then why not provide these? I wouldn't (and don't) put on slippers that may have been worn by other people, but would be happy to put these on.

I do have friends that remove their own shoes in my house- that's fine. Some people take their shoes off in their home, making it clear that they would prefer that I do too, but never demand it- so I take mine off, as a matter of courtesy, though I would rather leave them on. Sometimes I remember to take my own slippers to their house, in which case it's all well and good.

But I really don't want other people's bare feet on my rug, tbh. Who knows what nasty foot infections they may have?

weegiemum Argentina Mon 18-Mar-13 13:53:23

I really can't remove my shoes. I've got a disability which affects my feet (numbness) and also my balance. I can walk in specially chosen shoes (I don't need medically ordered shoes) but tend to stagger/fall if barefoot, or in socks or light slippers. Had to wear shoe covers when dd2 had an anaesthetic and I slipped and fell.

If you're unhappy having me in your house with shoes on, then thanks so much but I'll not come. I'm not prepared to be embarrassed by slipping and falling to keep your floor clean!

I wear them in my house too. You might want to avoid it, the carpets might be perfectly clean minting!

TattyDevine Mon 18-Mar-13 14:31:04

Uh, I don't get this whole carpet hating thing nor do I get the take your shoes off carpet worshipping.

I have some carpet in my house (not much actually, mainly wood floors downstairs except for the formal sitting area) and I don't make people take off shoes. Why? Because I think its rude, and because my floors get cleaned regularly regardless of who has or hasn't walked on them.

I don't particularly want people taking their shoes off, though if they are more comfortable doing so then they are welcome to do so.

I once had an electrician come to do something downstairs in a wooded floor area, and he took his shoes off. He was being polite I appreciate, but he had such sweaty feet he left big damp footprints about bless him. Those of you who think shoes are dirty would possibly be inclined to run a mop around after seeing that too no doubt...in which case you wonder what the point of dictating either way is.

I guess not everyone has damp socks like my sweaty teddy bear of a sparkie but there you go...

mechanicalsam Sat 17-Aug-13 03:44:03

I do hate these people who think of ones floor coverings being of no importance and should be allowed to walk across them wearing their outdoor shoes.
Firstly someone’s home is not an industrial workplace, it’s for them to live in and to have a privacy away from the humdrum of life. It’s also up to the individual how they want to treat their home. It’s not for people to comment as to what it is that they think they should do in someones home.
I think wearing shoes indoors is dirty, it makes me feel dirty and I have seen homes that have carpets that are rotten due to the constant traffic of outdoor footwear.
If someone wants to keep their home clean and choose not to wear their shoes indoors then that should be respected. The indoors shoe wearers of this country, think that a vacuum cleaner is going to pick everything up in a carpet and it will be restored to a clean pristine condition. WRONG!! a vacuum cleaner has a dust bag the operative word is on dust, not dog shit, oil and grease, any form of chemical, remnants of peoples vomit, spit and bodily fluids. Not to say foxes and other animals urine and dead meat they have scavenged from a bin. We have Rats who leave veils disease, very nasty.
Think of this, would you drive you car or motorcycle through your house, what’s on the tyres.
We like to lay on our carpets, the grand children play with their toys and as for one who commented to say that the kids do this outside, it’s not until a thorough inspection of the ground is made before this happens.
I do ask these indoor shoe wearers to get a wet clean white dishcloth and then clean the bottom of their shoes, just see the dirt which has been impregnated into the sole.
I think if people consider that they will upset their friends by asking them to remove their shoes, then these people, are not friends worth having, as they bear no respect for the way you live.
The shoes wearers just walk in and say goodbye, leaving the home owner with the great expense of cleaning or replacing their carpets, to bring their home back to how they like it.
I can only say that people who go straight into a house with their shoes on are too bone idle to take them off, have no respect for their home or other peoples. I wish that we could find a way of showing them the error of their ways and change their attitude to one of respect for other peoples property and health. After all, it took years to stop the smokers damaging our health

Bogeyface Netherlands Sat 17-Aug-13 03:51:48

I find it a very English thing - people just tramp all their filth and shit through your house. This is the only place in the world where people are not brought up wit ha common set of values to respect other peoples homes.

biscuit

The shoes wearers just walk in and say goodbye, leaving the home owner with the great expense of cleaning or replacing their carpets, to bring their home back to how they like it.

After one visit from a shoe wearer?! OTT much?!

I can only say that people who go straight into a house with their shoes on are too bone idle to take them off, have no respect for their home or other peoples. I wish that we could find a way of showing them the error of their ways and change their attitude to one of respect for other peoples property and health. After all, it took years to stop the smokers damaging our health

So wearing shoes in your house is akin to someone sparking up in your lounge? Prepared to be corrected but AFAIK dirty shoes dont give you cancer grin

treaclesoda Sat 17-Aug-13 07:12:36

I have never ever been in a house where people remove their shoes on entering, its like some mythical tradition that I've only ever come across on mumsnet. But if someone asked me to I'd be happy to oblige.

I'd be mightily pissed off if they expected me to guess that they wanted me to take my shoes off though, and then bitched about me because I didn't read their minds.

daisychain01 Italy Sat 17-Aug-13 07:36:37

I dont ask people if they want me to take my shoes off, I just do it anyway. Nobody is offended then! No big deal, it just shows consideration IMO

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