To speak to this boy about his tattoos. And how?

(56 Posts)
pouffepants Sun 17-Feb-13 19:27:15

A young lad of 15 lives next door, he hangs around with ds sometimes, and is really lovely. Often in and out of our house, and really chirpy and friendly.

He has got a tattoo, on his lower stomach, of his niece's name. It has been done by his dad, who has a new 'career' plan every week, and this week's is tattooist. The tattoo is wonky, and has a capital letter in the middle, and is of a weirdly spelt name anyway.

The other lads think it's hilarious, but are not laughing, they are deliberately telling him that it's really cool, and are 'fake' saying how cool they think his parents are for doing it. They are egging him on to show as many kids as possible. He's absolutely lapping it up and strutting around, and making a show of pulling down his waistband in a posey manner.

One of the boys told him straight, it looked stupid, but he was just told that he was jealous that his parents weren't so cool.

Anyway, I now hear that's he's intending on getting mum tattooed on one arm, and dad on the other. Even though ds thought the original one was hysterical, he thinks this is too silly to leave, so has attempted to tell him it's a bad idea, but has also been accused of being jealous.

So should I attempt to speak to him? He's never going to listen to me anyway is he?

Disclaimer, I've not seen the tattoo, but all the boys agree that's what it looks like.

StuntGirl Sun 17-Feb-13 23:01:14

I think someone upthread raised an interesting point; they asked if someone was cutting or branding their child would people be up in arms about it. There is a form of body modification similar to tattooing called branding, and one called scarification. Branding burns designs onto the skin, and scarification involves cutting the pattern into the skin. If the dad decided to get into one of these markets and practised on his son, would it be fobbed off by anyone? Or rightly seen as the abuse it is?

DeepPurple Sun 17-Feb-13 22:52:16

Littlewhitebag shock you work with abused kids and wouldn't investigate a parent assaulting their child? I think you are in the wrong job!

A child of 15 cannot consent to a tattoo and a parent cannot consent on their behalf.

Get the police involved - it is assault.

CSIJanner Sun 17-Feb-13 22:46:03

Tell you what OP - if you don't want to report your law breaking, health risking twunt of a neighbour, PM his name address and his sons name to one of us and we'll do it for you with no blame nor onus on you.

Your neighbour will have his equipment seized, will be slapped with fines and will face 2 years in jail for exposing his son to Hep, HIV, infection etc, plus from your sons description, piss poor artwork etched onto his child's body for life.

Unlicensed Tattooists

StuntGirl Sun 17-Feb-13 22:44:33

To be honest there are actually no qualifications or training schemes or anything at all for tattoo artists. It's a totally self-regulating industry (that's why there are so many shit ones). Whoever said anyone can do it is bob on. To open a tattoo studio you need a licence from your local council, and to pass the inspections, and that's it.

But yes, I suspect he knows less than fuck all about safe practices, and that's a dangerous thing.

Remotecontrolduck Sun 17-Feb-13 22:39:56

It's not so much that it's a 'child protection issue' getting a tattoo at 15 (well, it is I suppose), it's the fact that his dad is doing it himself, with no training, leaving him open to disease, infection etc.

Plus, the poor lad is going to be so embarrassed about them in a year or twos time and be desperate to get rid. Laser removal is very very expensive. The one he has is easily hidden, anything on his arms are not. I'm 99% sure he'll regret this. Report to police to save him several grand in laser removal.

You wouldn't investigate a father effectively branding his underaged son?

Would it be investigated if he was cutting him or burning him and leaving permanant scars as long as he had the child consent because he thought scars look 'cool'?

No-one under the age of 18 can get a tattoo regardless of parental consent.

foreverondiet Sun 17-Feb-13 22:28:43

You have to report it to social services and if he has showed loads of people no one will know its was you.

StuntGirl Sun 17-Feb-13 22:19:27

You are wrong littlewhitebag.

I am surprised to find the child protection authorities wouldn't take action on a father tattooing his child, I find that very sad sad

We have been in similar situations, its hard but the official people understand this.

I have found the RSPCA can refer you on all situations. We have never regretted it

(I sound like a loon but seriously, we have not regretted it)

littlewhitebag Sun 17-Feb-13 22:04:39

It is not a child protection or SS issue. I work in this area and we would not investigate this. Maybe the Police would look into it or some professional body related to tattooing. Also i think (could be wrong though) that if the parent agrees then a child can get a tattoo.

jeanmiguelfangio Sun 17-Feb-13 21:58:54

No one is going to know its you that has reported it, if the boy is showing lots of people then anyone could report them. What happens if another child wants one, boy says my dad can do it, and before you know it there are even more problems. Report the guy, who knows where is can lead- there are reasons why there is so much legislation to protect people

lastSplash Sun 17-Feb-13 21:52:51

As posters above have suggested - report it to the school. Do it anonymously and they will have to act (after checking it's true). Unlikely it will come back to you for neighbours to be pissed off about.

HollyBerryBush Sun 17-Feb-13 21:44:15

TBH with you, if he's shown it to other teens, they will comment on it to teachers anyway.

People do do it - I frequently see 15/16yo's with them, just as they are about to leave school in the summer term. They love showing them off hmm. I love pointing out they have just marked them selves out as identifiable next time they get nicked!

StuntGirl Sun 17-Feb-13 21:39:07

Oh FFS fine OP, don't do anything. But equally don't come asking for advice on what to do if you're not willing to actually take any action. The father has acted illegally, immorally and irresponsibly. It's abuse. And if his friends and even other adults in his life won't stand up for him then I really feel for the poor lad, he stands no chance.

countrykitten Sun 17-Feb-13 21:31:56

Report your concerns to the school - and stress that no one must know it is you that has reported it. They can then 'catch sight' of it and take it from there.

Sometimes we teachers have to be a little devious!

HollyBerryBush Sun 17-Feb-13 21:21:31

Social Services on this all the way - you can do that without leaving a name>

It cant come back to you - he's shown all and sundry the tattoo.

I'd also phone his school - dont need to give your name.

Remotecontrolduck Sun 17-Feb-13 21:16:48

Oh dear, you need to report this before he lets his dad do something he's REALLY going to regret. He needs protecting from himself, and his dad who's clearly a bit unhinged. Who'd do that to their own son?!

Lazer treatment is insanely expensive, please don't let his dad deface him any further. Poor lad is going to be mortified in a few weeks time.

TroublesomeEx Sun 17-Feb-13 20:55:11

OP, the dad's plans, long term or otherwise, are irrelevant.

You need to report this to the police. They will deal with the legal side of things and raise a safeguarding alert with the LA who will deal with the CP side of things.

You do need to do this. It's not akin to child abuse, it is child abuse.

I will echo the calls for you to report this. His dad is using him as a practice canvass. As much as vegetarians will hate this, pig skin can be used for this. A 15yo will think think he is 'cool' and 'hard' for this is, it's not it is akin (imho) to child abuse.

sunshine401 Sun 17-Feb-13 20:18:07

This type of behavior is becoming more and more common!! It is disgusting report it for the sake of investigation but the outcome will not be great. Which is a shame. Dad will most likely be finned and cautioned which will hopefully be enough to discourage him from being so stupid in the future.
sad poor lad.

pouffepants Sun 17-Feb-13 20:15:07

I'm not sure what the longterm plan is, but I expect it to go the way of his previous plans.

Including, running an american diner, ice cream man, clown, butlins redcoat, hog roast, dog breeding, and roofing. None seem to last very long, so I expect this to blow over pretty quick. But the son gets to keep a few momentos by the looks of things.

sukysue Sun 17-Feb-13 20:11:42

He's 15 and he needs help. It is a child protection case imho it needs referring to social services (which anyone can do) and I'm sorry op but in your heart of hearts you know what you have to do good luck.

StuntGirl Sun 17-Feb-13 20:10:16

I'm not 100% on the legalities of that bit but I suspect sadly not as long as she is over 18 and no money is exchanging hands. If he is charging to do it out of his house with no licence then THAT is definitely illegal.

specialsubject Sun 17-Feb-13 20:09:09

tattooing a 15 year old is the same as tattooing a baby in the eyes of the law.

please report. Child abuse.

pouffepants Sun 17-Feb-13 20:07:16

If it had been on the sister, who is 18, would it still have been illegal because he's (presumably) not licensed?

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