this is why i HATE facebook sometimes....feel so left out and pissed off (sorry for FB related aibu)

(85 Posts)
MoodyDidIt Tue 12-Feb-13 09:32:08

its half term here, and i just found out - through the evil FB, that 3 of my good friends and all their DC's are going on a day trip today (don't want to say where as may out me)

and they haven't asked me

and they have had the chance to because i have spoken to them all in the last few days...and its not for any reason like no room in the car or whatever as they are going on the train

i feel like i am back at school....DC's and i would have really loved to have gone with them. why haven't they invited us?

i feel like i can't ask any of them directly because i will look needy and stalkerish....as i have only found out about it via them all tagging eachother in multiple statuses about how soooo excited they are hmm

we are all 30-something btw, not 16. i am sad sad

Springdiva Wed 13-Feb-13 10:08:09

I don't know, group outings can turn out quite fraught and 3 is not a good number.
Also often there is a difference in behaviour standards between different families and your DC's endearing fun loving behaviour could be someone else's devil child.
Don't assume what you are missing is a great success --- even if it looks that way on FB tomorrow, they aren't going to post that X was a grumpy cow and Y's DCs need throttled.
You are making assumptions.

Latara Wed 13-Feb-13 10:36:15

This sounds like my experience with 2 of my friends - they socialise more with each other because both have DC (I don't have children); I've seen the photos on FB & try to be understanding but it still hurts at times.

Latara Wed 13-Feb-13 10:37:17

Meant to say YANBU definitely.

MoodyDidIt Wed 13-Feb-13 16:37:22

Awww latara i had the same thing, when i was younger and hadnt had dc, and my friends all started having dc i found that they all started hanging out together and not asking me as much....i found out later that they thought i would find it boring being around them and their dc which was actually true tbh blush

however things have changed now i have dc and we are closer than ever

its hard though when its all on fb though, at least fb didnt exist back then in the mists of time pre having my dc

HoldMeCloserTonyDanza Wed 13-Feb-13 17:15:14

Are their DC much older than yours then?

If you have toddlers and theirs are bigger they might have wanted a trip tailored to the older kids?

AmberLeaf Wed 13-Feb-13 17:33:51

Yeah that sucks.

It doesn't matter how many other friends you have or how mature you are, that hurt feeling from being left out is not nice.

The FB part of it makes it a bit of a statement too 'we are here, you are NOT'

You know the best thing is to rise above it, but it still smarts a bit.

Southeastdweller Thu 14-Feb-13 20:51:24

Did you speak to your friend?

LiveLoveBoogie Thu 14-Feb-13 22:44:14

I'd be tempted to post something along the lines of

"Ooh sounds like you've got a nice trip planned - we would really love to come along but have something much better planned

Another idea is to organise something and invite them all along - lead by example

bumperella Thu 14-Feb-13 23:01:47

FB is like that though. It brings out the " ooh, you saw Freind A on Tuesday, but I saw her on Wednesday for longer and we had loads more fun" in some (otherwise normal) people.

It's horrible, really, but best to either ask one/other/both directly (not on FB) or forget it.

MoodyDidIt Fri 15-Feb-13 08:26:48

hi southeast, no i have not said anything to any of them. i decided to leave it in the end. have had a really good half term doing lots with different friends so i am trying to focus on that rather than being (possibly) left out by the other friends

however, one of them (from the group who went on the trip without me) did text me yesterday just asking how i was and if i had a good holiday (was away last week with dh) and if i wanted to meet up soon confused...to which i just sent a friendly reply back to her

oh and i so know what you mean amberleaf re fb tagging in places etc being such a statement of "we are here having LOADS of fun and you are NOT" it sucks

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