to be pissed off with my brothers

(90 Posts)
McNewPants2013 Sat 12-Jan-13 00:52:09

every friday night i go to my mothers, sometime for a few bottles of wine or sometime for a few cup of tea. I live 5 minutes walk to my house.

however my brother's feel the need to walk me home. I don't need walking home. What do they think would happen grrrrrrr

DIYapprentice Sat 12-Jan-13 21:23:23

YAB(abit)U. I can understand why you think they are treating you as though you are an adult, but they are being caring and sweet. Do yourself and them a favour - next time put your arm through theirs, lean into them, and have a lovely brother and sister chat as you walk home. Take this as an opportunity to get closer to them, and become FRIENDS, and not just siblings. They sound lovely and I'll bet your relationship with them will be even more fab.

GinGirl Sat 12-Jan-13 21:19:30

YABU, sounds like something my brothers would do if we lived in such close proximity. They are gently protective of me (am older than them), much more so of the younger siblings - to the extent that the sister directly below them would have boyfriends vetted as a teenager.

Though come to think of it, one of my brothers turned up on my DSs first 3 dates with her now DH, and she is older than them as well!

bootsycollins Sat 12-Jan-13 21:15:03

It's really sweet and shows they care. Bet you have a good chat and a giggle while your walking too.

AmIOverReacting Sat 12-Jan-13 21:11:53

YABU they care about you and want to make sure your safe, there's nothing wrong with that

ProphetOfDoom Sat 12-Jan-13 21:10:23

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

I assumed the few bottles of wine was between all of them. Op, mother,brothers, maybe more. I agree if the op has a few bottles, too right she is taken home!

diddl Sat 12-Jan-13 19:59:59

I agree if the OP has been drinking it might be the best she is escorted home.

But if no drink or a couple of glasses then I don´t see the need.

I think it's different making sure that someone who is had a bit too much to drink home and general walking home simply because she is a girl.

The first is the kind and sensible thing to do. The second is uncalled for, especially if the person doesn't want walking home.

BoneyBackJefferson Sat 12-Jan-13 19:35:28

Anecdotally,

Three of my friends have been invovled in accidents walking home from a night out in town.

one fell in to the road and was hit bay a car. The driver stopped and took them to hoispital.

one fell through a window and had to get the owner of the house to ring for an ambulance to have there arm sticthed up.

The last one fell off the kerb and hobbled home, went to the doctors later in the week to find that the srain was actually a ripped ligament.

Accidents happen to those that have had a few drinks.

YANBU. I have this issue when I go round to a friends house. She always makes her DH walk me home. I find it really embarrassing and uncalled for. The more I say no thank you, the more that she insists.

I'm not a child and I'm absolutely able to get myself home OK and keep my self safe. I also refuse to live a life ruled by fear, that I need walked home "just in case" something happens.

CwtchesAndCuddles Sat 12-Jan-13 19:23:57

Your mums wants to be sure you get home safe, your brothers are happy to do it? I don't see the problem.

Yes the chances are you would be fine walking home alone after a few bottles of wine but is it worth taking a chance if you don't have to just to make the point that you are an independent adult?

diddl Sat 12-Jan-13 19:16:04

So if OP doesn´t want them to walk her home, why should she have to go along with it?

Is what others wish to do with regard to her more important than what she wants?

FiveGoMadInDorset Sat 12-Jan-13 18:38:48

A very gentle YABU. Your mother has brought up two sons with manners.

LadyBeagleEyes Sat 12-Jan-13 18:29:26

I don't see it as male chauvinism at all, I see it as brothers looking out for their sister.

LilQueenie Sat 12-Jan-13 18:23:10

YANBU I understand this. Other adults telling an adult how to live. It feels like being treated like a child and so you think they see you as one no matter how well meaning they try to be. Why do they think whatever could happen to you could not happen to them? Male chauvanism maybe?

McNewPants2013 Sat 12-Jan-13 16:37:07

The talk was in a joking way.

Next week when they walk me home I will just say thanks and be greatful they care.

JustAHolyFool Sat 12-Jan-13 15:37:58

Going against the grain, this would also piss me off.

YABU

My DH always walks my mum home if she been babysitting or like on Christmas day and she left about 4pm. She lives less then 5min around the corner.

When I give lifts home on a night out I always wait till the person I've drop home has gone into their house before I drive home.

It just the way both DH have been brought up.

Latonia Sat 12-Jan-13 15:13:59

OP your brothers sound lovely and I'm jealous. Would you like to swap them for a sister who you will only hear from once a year if you're unlucky? I'm convinced she's an alien but no-one will believe me.

maddening Sat 12-Jan-13 15:10:43

Stop feeling unnecessarily pissed off and feel all warm and glowy that you have people who love you smile

DontmindifIdo Sat 12-Jan-13 13:47:38

Your DB's have obviously had it drummed into them that a lady shouldn't be made to make her own way home. Yes, they are also then vunerable walking back from yours to their house, but they know that too, therefore they are saying by doing this that they would rather put themselves out and put themselves at risk than you. Thing is, if you have been raised with this, even if you know rationally that they are just as much at risk walking back and that most women are perfectly capable of looking after themselves, it's hard to 'unlearn' being a gentleman.

I would say your mum has done a good job raising her DSs.

(I have heard the view that young men are more likely to be targets of muggings than woman because they are more likely to be walking alone - people like your DB's make effort to make sure woman get home safely but don't bother about male guests, so therefore the male guest is more likely to be attacked)

StrawberriesTasteLikeLipsDo Sat 12-Jan-13 13:31:59

Stealth boast?!

Pigsmummy Sat 12-Jan-13 12:11:41

I got mugged on my own street a few years ago, I would love to borrow one of your brothers to walk me home!

HecatePropolos Sat 12-Jan-13 11:00:57

I am nearly 40 years old and my mother makes me phone her when I get home after visiting her.

People who love you - worry about you. It doesn't mean they see you as incapable.

More that they worry that something that is out of your control will happen to you.

My mother knows and says what a good driver I am. She doesn't think I am incapable of driving myself home. She worries that someone else who IS a shit driver will come along and drive right into me grin. That won't happen because I am unable to drive. It will happen because someone else was grin

don't interpret their caring about you as them saying you are lacking in some way.

It's the rest of the world they're worried about! grin

WhatchuTalkinBoutPhyllis Sat 12-Jan-13 10:56:53

YABU

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