to not sit on my DFs' sofa?

(73 Posts)

Now I have the never erasable knowledge that they frequenty have c-e-x on it.

Bleurgh.

It's not wipeable pleather either.

Groovee Thu 12-Jul-12 22:25:41

Nice to see chaos has sorted out that blinking posting malarkey but is having a c-e-x crisis. She'll be posting shaos as her name next.

Take a plastic bag with you and sit on it and if the friend says anything say you've become incontenient

Freshletticia Thu 12-Jul-12 22:55:54

We had to replace a sofa after DH (then BF) and I had way too mich sex on it every friday when the kids were at their dad's
It collapsed at one end and I wasn't leaning over the arm at all grin

FormerlyTitledUntidy Thu 12-Jul-12 23:03:21

I only ever have sex on the couch. Dd2 is still in with us, so we don't want to wake her. In fact the bed is the only place I don't have sex.
I don't think my friends would care.
<<disclaimer, am 26>>

My DF proudly told me in lurid detail all about their frequent c-e-x (?) on the beautiful white sofa on which I was having tea & cake.
She expected me to be envy then saw I was shock so reassured me that she always covered it with a sheet first.

Who said romance is dead?

TeWiDoesTheHulaInHawaii Fri 13-Jul-12 13:21:45

I like to tell my childless friends that I gave birth on our sofa. They pull great faces grin

SoleSource Fri 13-Jul-12 14:27:11

Sex is for wherever two consenting adults fancy! As long as no children around or objecting adults!

I had sex on the sofa, bed, park, on top of a wheelie bin, up the wall, floor, snow, car, sports stadium, bus stop lolol

SoleSource Fri 13-Jul-12 14:30:04

hotel bed, swimming pool, the sea, top floor of a tower block, i went to a swinging club once etc I couldn't have sex there, it was not my thing.

Groovee Fri 13-Jul-12 14:48:02

haha this made it on to the talk round up.

Mangrove Fri 13-Jul-12 16:37:34

Funny!

Chaos must've only dun the CEX 4 times if my maths is correct :O Maybe 5 <generous>

SaggyOldClothCatPuss Fri 13-Jul-12 22:48:46

WOOHOO! This made the roundup! That brightened up the end of a grotty day! smile

MsOnatopp Fri 13-Jul-12 22:51:05

ah just ask to join in next time. Then you wont mind sitting on it smile

MrsWembley Sat 14-Jul-12 10:46:26

Chaos, how exactly were you told about it - proudly by the participants or sneakily by someone peering through the window?

shewhomustbeEbayed Sat 14-Jul-12 10:53:32

I am a community psychiatric nurse and I used to visit a client whose partner had killed himself on the sofa, there was nowhere else in the lounge to sit except the sofa ( he bagged the computer chair next to his computer ) so "The sofa of death" it was every time. Makes a c-e-x sofa seem happy by comparison.

Dawndonna Sat 14-Jul-12 11:02:46

Top of a 37 bus. Behind the Afghan restaurant on Chelverton Road. Train going from Waterloo to Putney. A gig or three. All with the same chap.
Those were the days!

DialsMavis Sat 14-Jul-12 11:45:27

I am also nearly a virgin. I fear DP (partner of 7 years, friend of 12 years and father of my children) will never give in and admit it is his turn to buy some condoms. I was going to do it (to show I am better person) but he has now gone away with work until the 30th of July.... We are both stubborn fools, but we have both taken it too far this time smile

fizzfiend Sun 15-Jul-12 18:32:20

OP...this might freak you out a bit but every time someone kisses you on the cheek, just imagine where their mouth might have been......

itsMYNutella Thu 19-Jul-12 13:09:20

I'm imaging several scenarios as to how OP came by this information but perhaps it was something like this???
Chaos "I heard someone had a sofa of death, can you imagine sitting on something so freaky??"
friend " well have had kinky fuckery allll over exactly where you are sitting right now" <smug smuggy smugness>

itsMYNutella Thu 19-Jul-12 13:10:10

I am also crying with laughter at this whole thread, thank goodness for the talk roundup!!

hippermiddleton Thu 19-Jul-12 15:16:13

c-e-x is fine. I thought it was going to be one of those 'my Dad lets the Alsatian sleep on the sofa - AIBU to insist on a plastic sheet before I sit down?' ones.

diddl Thu 19-Jul-12 15:27:48

One of the funniest threads I´ve read in a while.

Was laughing so much teenage daughter told me not to forget to breathegrin

"It's not the sex, is it, it's the telling."-yes-how did that come about?

<checks own sofa for tell tale signs>

I thought this thread was about a DFS sofa grin

mrsalwaysawake Fri 20-Jul-12 11:14:11

Yes, do tell us exactly how the telling came about!

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