reality checks for girls

(5 Posts)
Cornflowerdreams Thu 14-Feb-13 20:58:07

I think I come from that generation when girls were told they could do anything they wanted and to call yourself a feminist was a bit outdated, out of touch.

So I even though I saw pockets of inequality here and there, I tried to overlook them, ignore them and move on.

All went relatively OK until I had children. It was like going back to the 50's and without any warning! I felt angry, very angry. The way people start to perceive you at work when they find out you're pregnant, when you come back from maternity leave. It's not awful, but it's not a comfortable place to be, as opposed to when you didn't have children.

To add to the anger, at home, the inequality of expectation was also felt, big way.

I could say, and maybe this is not the right approach, that anger has brought me to feminism. Anger is not a good emotion, but working on it, and trying to do something to turn that anger is something positive is what I've set my mind on doing. I'd teach my daughter that.

mobellydance Thu 14-Feb-13 20:20:18

My DD is just 3 months, and I really worry about how to find the best way to give her the strength and confidence to deal with the inequalities she will doubtless face.... Excellent article, I have shared it on facebook, as I have a number of feminist friends on there... As well as a few sexist ones who could use the education...

LineRunner Thu 14-Feb-13 16:53:45

I agree it's good to teach girls to be angry with injustice.

Interesting my DD's main complaint about her college lecturers/teachers is that if she is angry about a perceived injustice (often sexism) she is asked to sit out until she calms down, or go to the welfare office, rather than being listened to.

So we have to teach the teachers as well, to listen to female anger, not just pack it off to the nearest counsellor.

DD says that the teachers are much more sympathetic to internalised female anger, that which is turned in on itself, such as eating disorders and self-harming.

I am disappointed that in my lifetime the 'gobby' label still applies to a young female with a voice and a sense of injustice.

snowshapes Thu 14-Feb-13 13:22:04

thank you for this - I am printing it out. Definitely food for thought, but only a quick reply as am at work.

HoleyGhost Thu 14-Feb-13 09:25:18

m.jezebel.com/5984059/you-cant-empower-girls-without-a-reality-check

This article interested me because I grew up thinking we had equality and that feminism was no longer relevant in the UK. The reality was not something I was prepared for, and I think I would have made better choices had I understood.

I want my DD to feel that she can do anything she sets her mind to, but to be ready for the challenges along the way.

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