Am I going too far in telling my dss that they can't sing these 2 songs?

(31 Posts)
GreenPetals Thu 13-Dec-12 15:51:49

The songs are 'I am sexy and I know it' and 'Sexy lady'.
I am increasingly getting annoyed with the lyrics and this idea that women are only sexy and have to be sexy.
dcs are just 8 and 9yo so have no idea what they are actually signing/saying but still...

toomuch2young Thu 13-Dec-12 15:55:40

In unsure of your meaning op?
I'm sexy and I know it is a cheesy song written and performed by men, who are not the stereotypical 'sexy' at all!! Have you seen the awful slightly amusing video?
Your taking it to seriously. Though I am very against the sexualisation of children this doesn't sound the case at all here.

SantaIAmSoFuckingRock Thu 13-Dec-12 15:58:01

when you say 'sexy lady' do you mean gangnam style?

mindalina Thu 13-Dec-12 16:03:45

Ah interesting. My son who is five has recently been singing 'I'm sixty and I know it and I really wanna show it' and I couldn't work out what he was on about. Presume this is one of the songs referred to by OP. I suspected it might be a corruption of sexy and tbh, it made me feel very uncomfortable as well. I think it's completely reasonable to tell them not to sing those songs in the house if it irritates you for whatever reason.

RubberDuck Thu 13-Dec-12 16:04:15

I sang some horribly inappropriate songs as a child before I knew what they were all about. I think it's a rite of passage grin

Besides, if you make a big deal about it, then it just draws more attention to the lyrics.

SantaIAmSoFuckingRock Thu 13-Dec-12 16:12:09

i agree with rubberduck

GreenPetals Thu 13-Dec-12 16:14:19

Yes to a rite of passage...

But I do have an issue with the association of sexy and lady/woman. You never hear anything like this about a man being ... what by the way? Why not associating woman with clever, interesting...

Increasingly, I have some issues with the dcs are learning at school re the role of men and women. I see my dcs coming back with comments such as 'Oh mummy can't build a cupboard as well as daddy' (whilst I was actually building said cupboard!) as well as question that are 'scientific' directed at DP (when I am the engineer in the house!).
I am getting more and more the feeling that I need to counterbalance that because they seem to 'absorb' all these messages at school wo understanding (and too young to do so) but I know it will stay (Same story than the teacher who was telling me that girls couldn't do as well as boys in maths/science hmm)

RubberDuck Thu 13-Dec-12 16:19:36

Um, but in the first song it is the man who is singing I'm sexy and I know it so the label is being applied to both equally.

I agree that pop songs do have some awful lyrics, but they're going to be exposed to them BECAUSE by definition they are popular. As they get older you can use them as teachable moments (actually, we use computer games as our big teachable moments at the moment - as I prefer RPGs which have the option of having a strong female lead and we've had quite a few discussions on the assumption that women can't be strong or the hero) However, until they're old enough to even realise what the words even mean then the rest is going to go a bit over their heads. Mostly it's a catchy song they're singing along to completely oblivious.

(Has fond memories of belting out Relax by Frankie Goes To Holywood and Let's Talk About Sex by Salt n Peppa)

SantaIAmSoFuckingRock Thu 13-Dec-12 16:38:18

i'm too sexy- right said fred grin

CajaDeLaMemoria Thu 13-Dec-12 16:42:48

Agreed, you need to listen to both songs and watch the videos.

I'm Sexy and I Know It is performed by a group of men who parade round in thongs, and generally poke fun at themselves. It's funny. It's popularity has continued because the Australian and UK male swimming Olympic teams remade the video themselves. No women involved. It's men who are being labelled "sexy".

Gangnam Style is mostly in Korean, but there are two versions - one with just Psy with the heyyyy sexy lady chorus, and one which is sang by a woman.

I'd be very aware that by stopping your DCs singing these songs you are making them "naughty", and therefore they'll probably do it more. Everyone is singing them.

Your other issues sound fair enough, but nothing to do with those songs, or any songs. You'd need to speak to the school about that. Perhaps encourage the school to invite in female engineers/scientists/mechanics/builders?

RubberDuck Thu 13-Dec-12 17:04:50

Actually one song atm really does give me the chills - Hey You Beautiful by Olly Murs as I feel it feeds into rape culture:

You say that you don’t
But I know you do
Playing hard to get, get, get
Girl I’m onto you, you
Telling me no, no,
You really mean yes, yes
Let yourself go,
Why don’t you confess

But again, a small child won't understand the significance AT ALL, whereas for a preteen it could be an opening into starting to talk about the concept of enthusiastic consent.

So, I do get what you mean about song lyrics and popular culture giving bad messages. I just don't think you can counteract them effectively by making them taboo.

RubberDuck Thu 13-Dec-12 17:05:43

(And now I really need to dig out some old Right Said Fred tracks, thanks Santa grin)

drownangels Thu 13-Dec-12 17:08:09

There are plenty of songs you could 'ban' because of your concerns but I wouldn't have said those two.

<<bloody love 'sexy and I know it', especially the vid!!>

SantaIAmSoFuckingRock Thu 13-Dec-12 17:18:40

grin

i'm noticing a trend with these songs by men reffering to themselves as sexy not being anywhere close to actually being sexy! grin

nellyjelly Thu 13-Dec-12 17:21:26

I love LMFAO. It is a funny song about men not women.

SomeTiggyPudding Thu 13-Dec-12 17:28:07

Do ya think I'm sexy? By Rod Stewart.

SantaIAmSoFuckingRock Thu 13-Dec-12 18:02:44

see ^ trend.

LittleTyga Thu 13-Dec-12 22:32:38

My Ding-a-ling! My Ding-a-ling! I want you to play with my Ding-a-ling!

Lyrics from my youth blush

SantaIAmSoFuckingRock Thu 13-Dec-12 22:37:28

grin

TheDoctrineOfSnatch Thu 13-Dec-12 22:51:51

Tiggy, did you have to? I'm eating!

ivykaty44 Thu 13-Dec-12 22:54:39

'I'm sixty and I know it and I really wanna show it'

I love this grin

muddledmamma Fri 14-Dec-12 22:19:40

My little boy is going through something similar. He gives it the pelvic thrusting dance moves and everything. hmm I try to avoid making an issue of it. This is the world our kids live in and if you ban it they'll only rebel or resent you for making them feel so different to their friends.

What you can do is gently instil your values into them so they grow up aware that they need to think about what they're seeing. But little kids just need to feel loved first and foremost. Keep them close, have fun with them, and they'll respect your views on bigger issues when they arise.

My ds (6) is constantly singing one direction live while we're young, and it does make me cringe "tonight lets get some and live while we're young" and "leave the pictures on your phone", but he doesn't understand the lyrics; agree that it's part of growing up, can remember my mum hating me singing "I wanna sex you up" - that's got to be the worst one for a child to sing!

Darkesteyes Fri 14-Dec-12 22:39:02

shock at the Olly Murs song. Not my type of singer so ive never taken any notice of those lyrics before. FFS.

familyfun Fri 14-Dec-12 22:44:57

my just 2 year old was heard singing "ooh sexy lady whoop whoop whoop bambam style" this morning blush. dd1 is 5 and knows the dance as they all do it at school.
she wants one direction cd for xmas, dp has bought her disney cd, not sure she will be pleased

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