8 months, not on solids yet... Help!

(14 Posts)
OpheliasWeepingWillow Sat 29-Sep-12 14:47:06

DD had silent reflux so we weaned her at 16 weeks. LOVED all food, purees you name it. Then she started refusing bottles so we stepped back from solids in case she had allergies.

Meds now have reflux under control but she just won't eat solids! It's been three months since she took anything with a spoon. She will chew on the odd carrot stick and perhaps accept a tiny bit from a pouch but that's it.

Otherwise she gags, splutters, cries, screams, kicks when confronted with food.

Pediatrician says to drop a milk feed and she will eventually eat as so hungry. Feeding specialist says start with ice cream on our fingers. Well that didn't work. So now what?

Am confused, disheartened and anxious.

What to offer her? When? How do I mask my own anxiety about her not taking solids?

She will take medicine from a syringe just fine and bottle feeds are now great. I just want to help her to eat!

lorisparkle Sat 29-Sep-12 15:01:21

I would take her back to the Dr / specialist.

Some thoughts - does she sit at the table with you when you eat? Could you put a little bit of what you are having on her tray or even have her sit on her lap when you are having a very 'child friendly' meal. She might be more interested if she is eating other peoples food! I would not try and feed her, encourage her, etc but leave her to it. Relax, chat to your DH instead. Model playing with some puree on her tray - without getting her to try it. She might just put her fingers in her mouth and think that tastes nice! I'm no expert though.

Rubirosa Sat 29-Sep-12 15:03:26

I would also try letting her sit on your lap and take things from your plate - something like a roast dinner or pasta would be a good one.

sleepywombat Sun 30-Sep-12 04:35:51

Hi I'm in a similar position.

My ds2 is 9 months & has developed a food aversion. He has silent reflux, food allergies & colitis. When I started to wean he would take everything keenly but it caused diarrhoea & writhing in pain all night long, so I left it a few weeks before trialling foods to let his system calm.

A few days ago, I tried him with a little food again. He either point blank refused or took a tiny bit off a spoon & gagged & retched.

Despite medical professionals telling me I have 'missed the window for weaning', I am remaining calm & taking it slowly. I have made puree really runny & just offered a tiny little at the same time every day - for the last few days, he has grabbed the spoon & sucked the food off, so we are making progress! I think he couldn't cope with the texture of thicker puree at first.
He still will not pick up food blw style, although he is quite happy to eat random bits of cardboard he finds & his brother's sticker collection(!). So I'm offering him a little every day in the hope that one day he'll give it a go.

My main issue is that there is so little I can offer him due to the allergies.

I really would advise against limiting her milk feeds in the hope that she is hungry enough for solids. Atm, she associates hunger with milk not food & replacing the milk will make her angrier & hungrier & less likely to eat imho.
I know plenty of 'normal' children who have not been interested in solids until they were at least 1, so I really wouldn't worry. If there is an issue with chewing & swallowing further down the track, you can always seek speech therapy or similar for her.

It is also v important to keep your cool, even when frustrated she isn't eating, because babies do pick up on these things. Just offer her a little, stay calm & smiley, don't put food/spoon right into her mouth - let her take if she wants, if she gags/cries/refuses, say 'never mind' & give her a milk feed. Then try again tomorrow. That is what I'm doing, anyway!

Good luck!

Sorry to generalise, is the paed a man? DD is easy to wean but she didn't want food when she was hungry until around 8-9mo. And she ate 3 meals of solid food (not purees) from 6mo. Before they understands solids, they only want milk when hungry!

I think I would stop all solids for now and have her back on full milk feeds. 8 months is still actually quite little, my two were BLW and neither ate anything much until they got the hang of it at about 9 or 10 months. Then they started to drop milk of their own accord. I would just offer milk and have her up at the table with you when you eat and put a couple of bits on her tray if she's looking interested.

BertieBotts Sun 30-Sep-12 09:12:10

I would also try a BLW type approach and try not to stand over her or panic if she isn't eating, she will be getting what she needs from milk. DS barely ate until he was 22 months old - whatever I tried he wouldn't.

I agree that she won't understand that food can satiate her hunger so it's best to let her experiment with it when she's not hungry, otherwise she'll just get frustrated and associate it with feeling sad/hungry.

OpheliasWeepingWillow Mon 01-Oct-12 04:07:41

Thank you everyone. I agree with you BertieBotts Whispers wombat and all that the BLW approach makes a LOT of sense but it's so slooooooow and I worry that it will never happen. But! Over the last two days I have offered her loads of carrot, cucumber and celery sticks and she has sort of gnawed on them suspiciously.

I must remember not to make a big deal out of it all with her. She does sit on my lap at meals and I let her grab and make a mess etc.

sleepywombat I think missing the window of weaning is arrant nonsense! otherwise half the world would still be taking bottles. Silent reflux is horrible isn't it sad and I can't imagine what it's like with allergies and colitis.

I have had some success with pouches in the last 48 hours. I sit her on my lap in front of a TV program (sad face but it works) and finger feed her pear puree, then try the pouch at her lips and repeat until she lets me squirt some in. This morning two squirts and no gagging which is a MASSIVE improvement.

So, she has milk 5 times a day. One hour before each milk feed I am going to try the pouch method.

I'm going to try the pouch method for 3 weeks. If that hasn't worked I will go back to the drawing board.

Goodness, don't worry about it working at 8 months, that is still pretty young on the weaning journey! Gnawing on carrots, cucumber etc sounds brilliant! How about trying softer stuff like ripe pear with the skin still on so she can hold it? Pasta was also a good one at this age.

Rubirosa Mon 01-Oct-12 09:26:07

I'd be a bit cautious of raw veg too at this age incase hard bits get bitten off and become a choking hazard - well steamed carrot or brocolli or roast veg sticks might be better.

BakingBunty Tue 02-Oct-12 12:46:14

My DS stopped eating completely at around 8 months. It turned out that he just hated being spoon fed and just wanted to do it all himself. So I second/third the BLW approach! Fruit toast is a really good thing to try... soft, sweet and easy to hold.

OpheliasWeepingWillow Wed 03-Oct-12 03:52:40

Babies are such a puzzle. This morning I popped some cold mashed potato in her mouth and she ended up eating at least a tablespoon of it in the end with me using my fingers.

hmm

eatssleepsfeeds Thu 04-Oct-12 18:29:12

You've probably done this but also completely distract her during feeding. When mine have played up, I would take to throwing and catching balls, singing like a loon and reading stories, showing pictures. Give her toys to fiddle with and then just sneakily pop the food into her mouth when she's not looking. Works with my 8 mth old when she's being a bit of a bugger. It will resolve itself in the end. Don't worry too much. X

OpheliasWeepingWillow Thu 04-Oct-12 21:47:42

Thank you! In the Night Garden is now our go to feeding programme grin and DH is the resident loon smile

Yesterday we managed 2oz of a pear pouch, some hot chocolate licked off a plate and a piece of lemon muffin. No gagging! Progress has been made. Hopefully I have not spoken too soon.

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