Think our neighbours are feeding our cats

[converseconvert]

For the second day in a row I've spotted our youngest cat being let out of our neighbours house. This along with him not coming home at night or in for food during the day for the past couple of weeks has me guessing that he's being fed by them. Our older cat is still coming in for food but isn't eating as much as usual. Both cats are still in good health and are obviously getting food from somewhere just not here.

Also a bit of backstory. Our neighbours are relatively new (moved in beginning of summer) and have commented how friendly both our cats are and how they've found them asleep in their house. I told them to chase them out house but they just laughed it off and said they must have followed their cat in. This was during summer when they had their back door open. They've also commented how the cats are frightened of our dog.

Since they don't have their door open all day now (neither them or us have cat flaps) and I know for certain that our cats are not frightened of our dog I assumed their was nothing to worry about. Now our youngest cat doesn't seem to want to come home and I've clearly seen him coming out of their house twice. I need to say something to them don't I? How do I tell them to leave my cats alone without coming across as rude or causing a rift?

[cozietoesie]

Oh dear, converse. I always read this sort of OP with a sinking heart, having gone through (with the owner) the 'Catgate' threads on AIBU.

Myself, I'd drop them a gentle and jolly note asking them not to feed your boy because you need to know what food he's getting. (It depends on your relationship with them, really. You might wish to add - 'and don't take him in' as well but I leave it to your judgement.) Then see how it goes before you actually go across to see them about it.

[cozietoesie]

The latest Catgate thread.

\link{http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/1358674-Catgate\Catgate}

[converseconvert]

Thanks cosie. We are on speaking terms so I might just make a joke about him sneaking in their house again and say I think he been scrounging done elsewhere as lost interest in ours and it's upsetting kids him not coming home.

Feel so sorry and also angry for OP on catgating thread. Don't think my neighbours at that stage but think they probably do think they saving my cats from my terrible (big soft) dog.

[cozietoesie]

Oh no - Catgate is extreme. It gives one perspective though I think.

[BeatTheClock]

I think you should say what you've seen and that you've noticed your cats aren't hungry. I know you don't want to cause a rift - who does with neighbours after all, but in the nicest possible way tell them to stop now bece it's concerning you. How on earth do they know that your cats are scared of your dog

[Bilbobagginstummy]

One of my cats is an incredible social butterfly and visits many neighbours.

I always say that I am very happy for him to visit them, but please:

• don't feed him, and
  
• send him home at night.
  
  Fortunately no one has ever failed to do the above (in 11 yrs and 3 different houses). I think he's had the odd titbit and I know he goes to the pub so I daresay he gets bits there, but I have always found that if I am clear about the above - including that I am happy for him to go visiting - then people are very good about it. They generally like having a furry visitor for whom they have no responsibility.

[sashh]

Before Mystery Cat moved in my next door neighbour's cat would come in but I had a 'do not feed' rule.

[cozietoesie]

He goes to the pub ?

[colditz]

Buy a collar and write "I am on a special diet, please don't feed me" on it. Only a real crotchbag would ignore that.

[converseconvert]

Beat they seem to have the idea that Akitas are prone to attacking cats. I know they have a lot of bad press but wasn't aware of the cat thing

I'm impressed at cat going to pub though wondering what his favorite tipple is now?

[Bilbobagginstummy]

He goes to the pub

Don't think he drinks, though, just joins the old men snoozing in the corner.

[gobbin]

We had this issue with our old cat who died in Aug. and our next door neighbours. Made doubly awkward as they fed him in our house on the odd occasions we went away. In earlier times he would also be allowed to sleep on their bed overnight.

I had to speak to vet about it and he recommended that we told them they MUST stop feeding him as he was borderline diabetic (he wasn't). This worked, finally.

In retrospect, I should have been much firmer, much sooner. You need to be polite but firm and make it absolutely clear that you are the only person responsible for feeding so you can monitor how much they're getting and that you insist that they don't allow them in.

We had nights where WE would have to wait for THEM to let OUR cat out of their house before we could get him in and go to bed. They were dictating what we did in our own home!! Never, never again.

Let it continue and be prepared for one huuuge can of worms to be opened!

[Fluffycloudland77]

We had a cat when I was little who used to go to the pub barbeques and come home with sausages and burgers or chicken joints.

He'd stink of fags and bbq smoke.

[ditavonteesed]

op are you me my problem nieghbour thread I would nip in the bud asap as 4 years later on and I am still fuming and not really getting anywhere, basically we pay the insurance and vets bills for cats that we never see.