Mumsnet Talk

Hi I'll try to keep this short I am currently looking after my 14 year old goddaughter, her parents separated and neither 'wanted' her so she came to me initially while they sorted themselves out but then she asked to stay, enrolled in school etc. she seems very happy her behaviour has gone from being really bad to being excellent I have 2 ds s and she is lovely with them. Doing well in school etc. I let her go out to a youth club on a Friday night that is supervised and my dp collects her. She really is gorgeous thing is the other day she asked me about sex just that she had read a lot in magazinrs and she and her friends would like to know the truth -mechanics i think -as she is Confused. How much is too much information? I suddenly feel hopeless ill qualified! I told her sure and will sit down one evening this week, we are very open generally because of the unusual situation. Would a good book help? I lost my virginity at 14 far far too early, now I don't think she is having sex and am obviously glad she came to me but just unsure, can anyone with teenagers help any and all advice welcome!

confused.

This sounds a little bit of a strange and unusual request, if you don't mind me saying. What is it exactly that you would like the well-meaning strangers of mumsnet to tell you about sex?

Just a quick question

Have you registered with Social Sevices that you have undertaken an informal fostering arrangement ?

I talk to foster dd all the time about sex when she asks - she quite often forgets things like in yr 6 they explained the mechanics to her but only a few months ago (now 13) she said she didn't realise she had a vagina and an anus - so bear in mind that one talk won't do it.

Whenever we watch 'Friends' something new comes up - recently I've explained blow jobs and the female orgasm to her because of episodes. Also we've had quite a few talks about std's as she'd heard of herpes/crabs from older children at school.

I'm sure a mumsnetter will recommend you a book - I haven't used one.

Thanks all sorry if my post was unclear, i am just unsure how much information. Laurie - friends episodes-love that idea to bring up possible questions and guess will just discuss as these things come up, had a momentary panic sorry. And yep all official channels are informed.

Is she not seeing her mum at all ?

Do it in a child-led way - talk specifically about the mechanics so that she knows what goes where but otherwise be led by what she wants to know.

For example - I won't be telling dd about 'anal bleaching' (have you seen the thread on here about it) until she asks

Thanks think as you say I will just follow her lead. Wow just looked u that thread definitely will not be mentioning that unless she does !! She is seeing her Kim whenever she wants - very complicated

Her mum