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If your first child is disabled then you should not have anymore children..

(32 Posts)
SoleSource Sun 10-Feb-13 16:33:21

Two women have told me this.

Upset me

Are they right or wrong?

(My DS is blind, Autistic)

feelthelies Mon 11-Feb-13 00:14:38

shock 70s?

Terrible.

The T4 programme sends shivers down my spine, but I see it as a past era. I was born in the 70s.

Scary.

BeeMom Mon 11-Feb-13 01:07:38

I did it the other way around - my second child is the more involved one, but we later found that her brother has the same condition. I have been asked whether I wished that DS was worse so I "would have known to stop having kids".

I replied "no, but I bet your parents are thinking twice" (in the most drippingly sarcastic tone I could muster). I only said it because it gave me an extra few seconds to visualise my hands around his throat.

Some days you just want to choke the stupid out of people.

MariusEarlobe Mon 11-Feb-13 01:22:33

Sole my cousin has four children,one has severe Sn and will never life independently, the other three (two older one younger) are all NT. But if they weren't then so what.

I was watching call the midwife tonight and they were at an institute in the story for children with sn.

My aunt grew up in such a place until it closed, she had no more sn severity than my dd who has mild learning difficulties. Made me angry.

ouryve Mon 11-Feb-13 10:33:04

Of course, they're wrong. Besides, DS1 wasn't diagnosed until after DS2 was born. We would have stopped at two, regardless, but we did feel we couldn't cope with any more children and took steps to make sure we couldn't have any more. That was our own personal decision based on our own, personal circumstances, though. There might be times when we hmm at other people's choices when it comes to having a family, simply because we don't think we'd want to do the same, in their shoes, but we would never dream of imposing our own beliefs or thoughts on others.

Obnoxious, ignorant people shouldn't be allowed to breed and pass their nasty values and attitudes onto their offspring.

SoleSource Mon 11-Feb-13 14:23:23

I am an.idiot. I know they are being stupid but I take it on board.

Also had lots of comments about DS needing a school bus when we have a motability car...


Cheeky fuckers!!

elliejjtiny Mon 11-Feb-13 14:38:06

I have 3 children and another on the way. DS1 has mild hypermobility, DS2 has EDS and uses a wheelchair. DS3 has hypermobility. Not sure about DC4 yet. People say this to me. Personally I think they only have the right to comment if they are providing significant amounts of respite. Yes DS2 costs the state money in DLA and carers allowance but someone who comments DC might cost the state far more if they become a drug addict, have 10 children on benefits or become paralysed or suffer severe brain damage in a car accident.

elliejjtiny Mon 11-Feb-13 14:41:31

PS feel free to have 10 more children with my blessing. I think I'll be stopping at 4 due to the practicalities of heaving a 7 year old on and off the toilet while being hugely pregnant and the non existance of a contraption with 2 wheelchairs and 2 buggies that can be clipped together or be separated grin

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