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Do you think a hairdresser would/could unknot dd's hair?

(21 Posts)
mynameisnowsonicthehedgehog Mon 28-Jan-13 11:39:15

My twin sons are mixed race and have very long tight afro hair, so it can get very knotty very quickly, dts1 (ASD) really struggles on hair wash day, which is thankfully only once every two weeks.

I use coconut oil to saturate the hair, then leave for around 15 minutes. I then use a wide tooth comb and gently comb through, preferably whilst watching a dvd with a snack (distraction.)

I also use a satin head cap, like an old fashoined mop cap to reduce the effects of the rubbing through the night, this really helps. He wouldn't wear it at first but we persevered and he puts it on himself now.

Lastly I spray their hair daily with a mixture of conditioner and water to keep the hair conditioned therefor reducing knot build up.

Not the same level of actual hair problem (a DS with quite short and very fine hair that does not tangle), but to avoid the ambarassment of him screaming non-stop in the hairdresser (not because of the haircut but because of becaing made to stay in one place), we have a lady from a nearby salon come to the house. It works very well.

imogengladhart Mon 28-Jan-13 11:19:28

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Crawling Mon 28-Jan-13 09:58:03

Try some gloss serum (frizz ease) It works lovely on dds tight curly hair.

pinkpaperpiggy Mon 28-Jan-13 09:57:03

Thanks for all the ideas and support everyone.

mrslaughan The mobile hairdresser is a great idea. I know a friend of mine uses one so I'll ask her for the number. I never thought of it myself.

mrslaughan Mon 28-Jan-13 09:35:28

Do you know any mobile hairdressers? My neighbor is one - actually this is how I meet her, she put a card through the door advertising her business . dS at that point was hopeless about haircuts , but he is now fab. I think because it made it no pressure, we put on his fav movie, hairdresser very patient about how ticklish he is (helped that nice coffee and homemade cake supplied LOL) and now he is fab.
Very proud of him - even went to proper barber pre-Xmas and had full service, including hair washed.
Think key was taking the stress out of it

neverputasockinatoaster Sun 27-Jan-13 23:20:15

DD's hair ties itself in knots if you look at it in the wrong way! DD has no official diagnosis but a raft of sensory issues and she too detests the tangle teaser brushes.

Things I have done that work - conditioner on the bottom of the hair when washing but not on the scalp. Letting her hair dry before attempting to brush. Plaited everyday for school (but she won't tolerate sleeping in a plait!)

We have 2 Kent hairbrushes that DD will let me use and I find they are ok.

We have kentbrushes.com/shopexd.asp?id=38&catid=1 and kentbrushes.com/shopexd.asp?id=41&catid=1

I start at the bottom of the hair and hold as close to the roots as I can. if things are really bad I spray on some detangler.

I also let DD brush my hair first (and then run away fast to brush the muss out as soon as practically possible!)

DoubleYew Sun 27-Jan-13 22:44:45

Once you've got it untangled (I rub loads of conditioner for ages in the bath before trying to brush), spray in some adult hair serum - I got some Aussie stuff on offer in supermarket. Ds rubs his head back and forth on the pillow a lot as he sleeps badly, his hair has been much easier to deal with since I started doing this once a week.

zzzzz Sun 27-Jan-13 22:38:15

Plats will definitely help, day or night, they are life savers.

sunshine175 Sun 27-Jan-13 22:33:45

Lots of sympathy. Dd has same issue. We use loads of conditioner in bath -use adult one for extra dry hair. Leave on for 10 mins. Then brush through -she will allow me to use a baby brush starting at bottom of hair in the bath before rinsing. To be honest the breakthrough for us was she decided to let me plait it for her for bed. I watched a bit of pride and prejudice and noticed they went to bed in one plait and we tried it. It has stopped it getting so matted each morning.

bochead Sun 27-Jan-13 22:00:51

If you go to a hairdresser that specialises in black/mixed race hair then they'll have all sorts of hints/tips/tricks up their sleeve for dentangling including special spray invented for the purpose wink

(says the lady who has such horrible hair that a blow dry takes 6 hours - my hair can dreadlock overnight).

zzzzz Sun 27-Jan-13 20:41:09

Oil helps a lot. Camellia is the best and will lead to lovely glossy strong hair. It is very pricey though (I use Elemis and have used the same bottle for 5 years as it is very thin so you only use a splash), tangle teaser here too. Put it on dry hair, leave it all greasey for a couple of hours (or ten mins), then shampoo as normal, no need for conditioner. Once a week or every other week.

I would try something like massage oil (ie the carrier oil not the scented bit) and if it works think about camelia oil.

Ineedmorepatience Sun 27-Jan-13 20:38:28

I have resorted to olive oil in the past pink, I know what you mean about the tangle teezer they do make a wierd noise.

OT recommended massaging Dd3's scalp before attempting to brush. It helps to desensitise(sp) the scalp. It does actually help a little bit.

The other thing I do is put loads of conditioner on in the bath or shower and then brush it through, start at the ends and work upwards.

Good lucksmile

tabulahrasa Sun 27-Jan-13 20:30:42

When my sister was about 7 we got chicken pox, my sister said it hurt to have her hair brushed, so my mum just didn't brush it for about a month,we then went to stay at my dad's for a couple of weeks (summer holidays).

My stepmum attempted to brush DS's hair, but just couldn't at that point - so she took her to a hairdresers and they did it no bother. DS doesn't even remember it so it can't have been that traumatic and I know it didn't take long enough for me to start complaining, so half an hour tops.

Moomoomie Sun 27-Jan-13 20:18:30

i have found using a hair drier to heat the hair whilst you brush really helps. I keep a small hair dryer downstairs to use on dd hair every morning. Not sure how it works, I suppose it releases the natural oils.
Also keep hair trimmed, lot worse when it needs a cut.

pinkpaperpiggy Sun 27-Jan-13 20:12:32

Thanks for the replies so far. We have a tangle tweezers but she hates the sound it makes it her hair. Sounds can be a big issue for her.

I get so anxious about it that I stress her out whereas my sister wasn't bothered and got on much better.

marchduck Sun 27-Jan-13 19:31:03

Hi pinkpaperpiggy, I have been there! I posted on here for advice about DD's first haircut, because I was so worried about it. And of course, I got brilliant advice.
DD is pretty well behaved, but once her hair gets past a certain length, it is very prone to tats and she does not like it being brushed.
I phoned a small neighbourhood salon (one that still has those chairs with hairdrying hoods over them. I told them that DD had communication difficulties, and hadn't had her hair cut before. They were fine about it and said that they had a special chair for children etc. DD was brilliant - DH and I stood either side for her, and the hairdresser was great. She was very young - but just had that ease that some people do - she did a great job, brushed out DD's hair,then cut it quickly - no fuss or bother. I gave her a big tip because she was so good (and so cheap compared to what I pay).
What I have found works with managing DD's hair is to keep it collar length - less prone to tats - and `TangleTeaser' brush is effective.

Icedcakeandflower Sun 27-Jan-13 19:18:28

Dd has very fine long hair which got knotted and matted easily. I bought Tangle Teazer which is amazingly effective. Boots and Amazon stock them. They look like cheap Barbie brushes grin but really work.

I used to take her to a hairdresser who frowned at me every time she came across a knot - needless to say we stopped going there!

If she's willing to have her hair cut short, that would of course be the best solution!

pinkpaperpiggy Sun 27-Jan-13 19:17:28

Thanks inppropriate I have tried every detangler known to man. My next option is to buy coconut oil.

Part of the problem is that when she is stressed/ill/upset she rubs her head into the pillow. She has been ill quite a bit lately so it is very bad at the moment.

So many things bother her - she hates the sound a plastic bristle brush makes through the hair, she hates the smell of too much conditioner etc.

She used to be a lot worse but she did a course of Play Therapy that really helped.

inappropriatelyemployed Sun 27-Jan-13 19:11:56

Have you tried detangler? There was one Avon did which was brilliant. Also try lots of conditioner.

DS used to fiddle with his hair leading to knots. When they get too bad, I cut into them - vertically with scissors downwards. That seem s help.

I'm sure a friendly hairdresser would help if all else fails!

pinkpaperpiggy Sun 27-Jan-13 19:04:16

If I let them know in advance and was willing to pay over the odds if necessary?

She has sensory issues and hates having it brushed. I brush it every day with a soft bristle brush but I can't keep on top of the knots and it is in bad way.
DD is 6. She has a very dry scalp and fragile hair which makes it worse.

I know we should have it cut but she really loves her long hair.

She will not sit for me to do it properly but she has let my sister do it in the past. Sister not around at the moment.

Would it be awful to ask a hairdresser to do it? A hairdresser would know the right products and method and could probably do it much faster.

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