Mumsnet Talk

can anyone help me with how to tell a 'decent' social story to my 4.8yr old DD please?

we just had a meltdown because she fell over and i was trying to tell her a 'social story' about a girl i knew who fell over and got her tights wet, about how she worried all the way home about what was under the wet bit and how it wasn't really hurt under her clothes, just cold..

this was met with 'mum! that's not a story, that's me'! (cue more crying and stomping) and was not impressed at all

any help please?

I'm no expert but I think the social story's are supposed be be used daily and not at the time of conflict/ issues

There are formulas for how to write them but I can't remember all of it. There certainly has to be only one directive message and lots of reassuring statements . The language needs to be really simple with one idea per page.

How about (assuming your dd is like mine and gets hysterical and strips the instant a drop of water gets on her)

I like running and playing

When I play I wear my clothes

Sometimes my clothes get wet when I play

It's ok to wear wet clothes, they dry really quickly while I play

I like to run and play

Ok it's a bit rough, I'm tired..., but that's the kind of thing I was taught.

Sorry, I got half way through and couldn't remember what upset her.... I knew I'd missed the point. I can't think of what I want to say about it being ok to be cold and wet but maybe someone who's brain isn't asleep can chip in!

my OP was a bit garbled i wrote it as she was eating her dinner, so thanks for understanding any of it

yeah, i gathered i messed it up

she's terrified of hurt skin. bumps/bruises/cuts/grazes...all result in meltdowns.

and water in her eyes. and of being left behind. and of doors wbing closed on her. and....

it's so tiring isn't it?

Some info here www.autism.org.uk/living-with-autism/approaches-therapies-and-interventions/skills-based-interventions/social-stories-and-comic-strip-conversations/how-to-write-a-social-story.aspx

thanks, i'll have another go

I have a copy of the NAS's guidance notes for writing social stories. They are much easier to follow than Carol Gray's method. I can email them to you if you like - PM me.

i think that's what yanny has linked to, streaky, are they different?

all help is gratefully received tho

They are similar but not quite the same. The ones I have were in bullet points - they may be more or less the same pointers but not sure. It's quite a long time since I did their course and the notes weren't available online at the time. I can still email the typed ones if you want them - just shout .

How about something like;

When I fall over.

I like to run, jump and play.
Sometimes when Im running or jumping I might fall over. If I fall over, it may hurt or I may get wet and dirty. This is ok.
If I am hurt, I will tell my mum or helper. If I have a sore that is bleeding, they will help clean my sore and put a plaster on. This will make me feel better.

Sometimes if I am wet or dirty, I cant tell if my sore is bleeding or just sore. If it is cold outside, I cannot take off my trousers or tights to check. This is ok, and my mum will look after me. I will try to stay calm and walk home nicely. When we get home, my mum will check my sores and give me a plaster if i need one.
My adults will be happy that I have stayed calm and walked nicely.

HTH