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Stopping contact? I feel like a bad person.

(1 Post)
Dogsarebetter Fri 07-Aug-15 15:02:24

So previous post here http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2414719-Maintenance-and-stbxh

I'll try not to drip feed. He is still refusing to pay. He has now decided that I need to either collect or drop off as well as its unreasonable that he does both. This, added to the previous threats of violence against me and dp (threatening to shoot us while kids were in the house for example, unfortunately it was over the phone and I have no proof) and his increasingly unstable behaviour, for example we arranged that if I agreed to collect the children last weekend then he would pay maintenance, he then refused to pay maintenance and refused to bring them home telling me I had to collect them, so I arranged with his family member to collect them (they were at her house while he was at work, which isn't a problem) all fine so I thought, he then goes mental because I had collected them "behind his back" (?!!)
Oldest isn't his but he has been around since a baby, but he has no PR. Youngest is his. Told him he will have to see a solicitor to arrange contact as this isn't working, he's gone mental again and has told me he is "taking them as usual" on Saturday and "I can't stop him"
Am I unreasonable to stop contact until solicitors are involved? Unfortunately I've done such a good job at hiding his EA and unstable behaviour from the kids, they think he's bloody great and want to see him angry which makes me feel crap.

If only they knew he stole all my money and made us homeless after years of EA which is why we split in the first place sad

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