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I find my DH so rude, I just don't see how I am going to be able to live with this for the rest of our lives

(76 Posts)
timeismoney Sun 27-Jan-13 20:40:56

Maybe this sounds like a small thing but I just find my DH so rude at times, and it is impossible to ever get him to see or apologise when he's been rude as he just dismisses me with a 'whatever' or accuses me of the same behaviour when I haven't done anything remotely similar.

We have issues with our 4 year old and rude behaviour from her atm, yet DH doesn't seem to see that he models behaviour to her and that if he is rude to us she will pick up on it and see it as normal.

For example, after lunch today our 4 yr old asked if she could help tidy up and he told her to "get out of it" and "jog on". When I tried to point out to him that perhaps she's rude because he speaks to her in that way he did his usual passive-aggressive door-slamming "whatever" refusing to discuss it even when I try to discuss it with him rationally.

Our two year old now walks around saying "shut up, whatever" if someone says or does something she doesn't like.

Yesterday I went to the shops and bought a 6 pack of soft drink. Dh is sitting there this evening drinking one and then goes to the kitchen so I ask him to get one. He replies that it's the last one and he's just about to have it. I ask him very politely if I could have it as I haven't had any of them (he's drunk 5 in the last 2 days) and he's just had one and he chucks it down on the table, slams the door, sits in his chair and turns the telly up.

I try to speak to him about it, to try and explain my point of view "whatever" turns telly up.

I literally can't communicate with the man and I hate the affect the way he is is having on our dc.

Pagwatch Thu 31-Jan-13 17:07:31

Yes. But a good father was still the thing reached for as a good point when it is patently untrue.

So by all means we can split hairs about whether good sometimes can be reasonably paraphrased into great in a very brief post.

But let us not pretend that it is doing anything to help the OP see that her DH is a dreadful influence within the home.
It is petty, pedantic and an unhelpful diversion.

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