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Premature birth

Worried about my friend

3 replies

coochybottom · 26/09/2008 22:21

My friend and I both have twins. Despite complications I was lucky enough to reach 37 weeks and my twins were born without needing any special care. My friend,however, was not so lucky and her girls were born at 28 weeks weighing 2lb8 & 2lb2. They are now lively 3 year olds but she cannot help but worry excessively every time they are ill.She wont send them to nursery even if they have colds and says she is thinking of keeping them from going to school "until they are stronger". She is quite frankly wearing herself out and has also not been well. To me, send them to the nursery& give yourself time to recuperate but she wont!They only go one morning a week as she is so protective. Even the GP has told her not to worry so much,that they are absolutely fine now!I can only imagine the stress of what she went through and have tried to be supportive.Can anyone offer any advice on how I can help her to move on?

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BibiThree · 27/09/2008 23:28

TBH, I was much the same for the first year of my dts life, they are 14 motnhs now and I'm starting to relax, but I was much, much more protective of them than of dd1 (which doesn't seem possible as she was my pfb) - I have to force myself to relax about them and their heath.

They were born at 35 weeks due to igr, no massive health issues apart from being tube fed and kept in for 2 weeks, so I didn't go through the ordeal of having babies in special care, but something did happen inside my head whereby I felt that every tiny thing was going to take one of them away from me

I hope your friend turns the corner soon.

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kateri · 28/09/2008 01:51

My twins were born at 32 weeks, and were 2lb7 and 3lb10. They were in SCBU for a month.

I think I'm doing it wrong, though, as I'm totally lax... barely clean anything, wouldn't occur to me to try and 'protect' them from getting ill.

My excuse is that I'm boosting their immune systems with all the filth they roll about in and germs they get exposed to - and to be fair, they've never really been ill a day in their lives. (They're 14 months now)

Really, twins are exhausting enough without making EXTRA work!

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coochybottom · 28/09/2008 08:11

You seem to have a good attitude kateri. Wish some of it could rub off on my friend. I have told her that the best way for them to "get strong" is to be exposed to some germs and get immunity. I am worried that when they start school they will get everything going which will make her feel worse!